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Dear Lover
 
 
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Dear Lover (Paperback)

~ (Author) "When you feel deep into your heart, you feel love..." (more)
Key Phrases: feminine sexual essence, offering your heart, masculine shell, Chocolate Love, Masculine Insensitivity, Yearning Is the Key (more...)
3.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (21 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Product Description

Are You Ready to Open to Love’s Deepest Bliss?

Every woman knows the fairy tale: find the right man, give him what he wants and needs, and he’ll love you forever. But when the myth you’ve been asked to believe fails to deliver—when you sense you’ve been settling for far less than you know in your heart is possible—how do you attract and keep a man capable of meeting what you most passionately yearn for? In Dear Lover: A Woman’s Guide to Men, Sex, and Love’s Deepest Bliss, David Deida explores every aspect of the feminine practice of spiritual intimacy, from sexuality and lovemaking to family and career to emotions, trust, and commitment. Written as a collection of letters from a man to his "dear lover," here is this internationally acclaimed writer’s invitation to practice love as a living art, as you discover: • Why your man is always your choice—and how to pick the man of deep integrity who will satisfy the needs of your body, heart, and spirit • "Sexual essence" and the three stages of loving: how to understand your fluctuating capacity to experience divine connection with another • Knowing when to end a relationship and how to deal with the "him-shaped void" your absent man leaves behind • Daily exercises to help you and your partner move from separation to openness in two-bodied devotional trust Ultimately, what every woman wants is to give and receive love fully. Whether you’re partnered or alone, Dear Lover reveals that "your love is the same love that yearns to open at everybody’s heart. You will attract and inspire a man as willing and able to open as you are. Constant yearning is the call to open and give yourself to all as love’s offering."



About the Author

Acknowledged as one of the most insightful and provocative teachers of our time, bestselling author David Deida continues to revolutionize the way that men and women grow spiritually and sexually. His books have been published in more than twenty languages. His workshops on a radically practical spirituality have been hailed as among the most original and authentic contributions to the field of self-development currently available. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 184 pages
  • Publisher: Sounds True, Incorporated (March 1, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1591792606
  • ISBN-13: 978-1591792604
  • Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 5.9 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #20,340 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in these categories: (What's this?)

    #8 in  Books > Religion & Spirituality > Religious Studies > Gender & Sexuality
    #85 in  Books > Health, Mind & Body > Self-Help > Spiritual

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David Deida
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Customer Reviews

21 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
3.3 out of 5 stars (21 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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28 of 32 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars I'm going to be honest..., September 5, 2008
For me, David Deida unfortunately has some of the qualities of the children's story "The Emperor's New Clothes". There are two reasons why.

The first simply is there are large claims made to what his insights will bring. All his books promise to "guide" us into deeper spiritual understandings in the sexual realm. (And seriously, who wouldn't want that, right?)

The second "new-clothesian" quality of Deida has to do with his form of discourse. The thing about his presentation is, there are copious amounts of spiritual beauty backed up by an subtle but constant wash of judgementalism. The structure goes sort of like this: "you want this, you don't have it, I know why you don't, here is what you need to do."
But what if one does not totally agree with any of these "stepping stones" to understanding? The answer always seems to be that "you are not open enough yet to see it". "There is some blocking element in you".

Very little of his metaphoric insights about "gender" or "essence" or most any of his ideas for that matter, are ever presented as "one can think of it this way" but rather as "this is how it is". He states every belief he has about sexual spirituality with what I consider a totally unwarranted confidence.

And he has a system of "stages of growth" to pigeon-hole "where you are stuck".
So yes, of course, I want to "get it". Yes, of course, I want to have the deep blissful place that is "my potential". Yes, I really am wanting to "see the emperor's beautiful clothing!"

But honestly, while he earnestly and often eloquently gives gifts of insight into the subject, he also is rigid, arrogant, patently condescending, and as a writer, can be deadly dull and repetitive. Most of his core "beliefs" are for me painfully flawed. After reading this book, all I could think was, he really does not have much insight into the depth of the feminine essence nor a "feel for" life as a woman.

I would never recommend this book to anyone.
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37 of 46 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars superb book for any couple who wants to live in true harmony and love, January 3, 2006
'Superior Man' is for men, and an excellent book, but this is the companion volume for women, and gives deep insights into how a true man of integrity is able to and really wants to love the woman in his life. One woman, for this lifetime and even into the next. He writes beautifully and candidly, and each time I read it, I see more and more what I am able to share Tantrically with my partner. We have created bliss on a daily basis through skill, determination, discipline, and above all, love, and this from a man who is by no means easy to live with or love! Or who even thought he knew how to love, all his other relationships had failed so miserably.

Deida's advice about loving each other open to the divine even when 'stuff' gets in the way is one we would all do to remember. After all, what is more sublime than living and being in love-having that 24/7, 365 days a year, always, at every moment, is well worth it, so take the advice offered to heart, read his other books, Like Wild nights and Blue Truth, and get Superior Man for your guy, train and practice love, and Tantra, and be happy! It really does work! And as good as it sounds in the book, it is even better in real life!
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19 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Deeply profound, poetic help with love challenges, June 19, 2006
By Shellster (Oregon) - See all my reviews
My hubbie and I took turns reading this book and Deida's "Way of the Superior Man' out loud with each other. WOW, I literally cried as he read Deida's words because it seemed that finally someone understood what I have longed for all my life. Sure, there were things I didn't like hearing, and even disagreed with, but overall wonderful insights and leaps of growth in our relationship directly as a result of these readings.

Tho I have read many many books on the subject of love relationships--these two books are head & shoulders above any of the others.

I've never written a book review before until Deida's work...it is that good!

Shelly
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

1.0 out of 5 stars I yearn to quote a few sentences
So I am just quoting a few sentences picked by opening the book on a random page and pointing a finger at random paragraph. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Kant was right

1.0 out of 5 stars Men should not write this type of book about women..
I loved The Way of the Superior Man but this was way over the top and very very difficult to read and way to much stuff repeated.
Published 4 months ago by John Twitter

2.0 out of 5 stars Book Club Bomb
This book was not at all what we expected. This was our all female book club choice and many of us were unable to finish the book. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Veronica A. Domingo

5.0 out of 5 stars Dear Lover review
David Deida has an excellent handle on the differences between men and women. And how to use this understanding to complement one another in a spiritual / sexual partnership... Read more
Published 9 months ago by nala twain

5.0 out of 5 stars If you truly love her...
Foa all men who truly love their girlfriend... A man must be brave to open in the way Deeida explains. He must be truly brave. Read more
Published 12 months ago by Brendan Carl Clarke

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must-Read for every woman
This book has changed the way I see myself and the way that I see everyone. One of the most valuable books I have read. Read more
Published 15 months ago by healer333

1.0 out of 5 stars Total Trash
Oh, hell no. Deida is a clueless tool and this book is misogynistic tripe. Pass it on by.
Published 18 months ago by J. Chancey

5.0 out of 5 stars Great Intro to David Deida for Women
Dear Lover helped me to understand the yearning I've felt since I've been in my teens. Interesting material for women to get in touch with their own sexuality and needs--probably... Read more
Published 21 months ago by J. Wolfe

4.0 out of 5 stars He's written better stuff
I liked Dear Lover, but I feel that it's mostly similiar to Blue Truth but written for a different audience. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Kerri Knox - The Immune System...

2.0 out of 5 stars Not for any amount of Masculine Energy
For a woman who has any amount of masculine energy, this book will want to make you retch. On the other hand if you are entirely made of femenine energy, you will probably be able... Read more
Published on November 5, 2007 by Ms. Damage

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