Love a la francaise (Paperback)

~ Polly Platt (Author)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description

In her best-selling books "French or Foe?" and "Savoir Flair!", Polly Platt handed foreigners the keys to delighting in a visit to France and handling encounters with the French. In "Love a la francaise", she delves into the intimate lives of Anglo-Saxons who actually lived the dream and moved to Paris - fo good, for better or worse - as wives of French men. Why? To live in the city that celebrates women, where they could discover the meaning of being women, and being completely themselves, whoever they might turn out to be. But French men with their thousand-year experience in enchanting French women are not always in tune with Anglo-Saxons and vice versa. Why do some American women in Paris fail while others bloom and thrive? And how do happy transpalnts manage their success? After dozens of interviews and in-depth case studies, Polly Platt reveals the secrets of Love a la francaise.

Product Details

• Paperback: 249 pages
• Publisher: Schoenhofs Foreign Books; 1 edition (June 30, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1601110146
• ISBN-13: 978-1601110145
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.3 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #139,924 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Worthwhile, if you remember that everyone is an individual, January 19, 2009

By	A reader (Paris, France) - See all my reviews

This book, while highly entertaining, does paint quite a dismal picture of marital relations between American women and French men! I'm an American woman who has lived in Paris for four years, and I see both good and bad "mixed" marriages here, just like I see both good and bad marriages in my home country.

I agree that it's wise to be aware of the attitudes and beliefs of a people and to guard against over-romanticizing things when making a huge commitment such as marriage. This is where Polly Platt's advice is valuable, and why I think the book is worthwhile. But not all French men fit into the same mold. I think many of the men Polly interviewed for this book were of a certain class and age, and their views and beliefs don't automatically transfer to the rest of their countrymen (my French boyfriend, included).

American women are brought up, more and more, to speak our minds and not to put up with certain inequalities, and I think (although I don't want to overgeneralize) that France may lag a decade or so behind America, in this regard. So this may account for many of Polly's subject's sometimes stong reactions to the topic of a Franco-American marriage. (Also, keep in mind that Polly had never married a Frenchman.)

Still, I would recommend this book to anyone with visions of marrying a Frenchman, in concert with one or more other excellent books out there on cross-cultural marriage, as there are also myriad benefits to being in an intercultural relationship.

Lastly, I've just learned that Polly Platt passed away at the end of 2008 of pneumonia and heart failure, at the age of 81. I saw her at a lecture just a few weeks before, and she was as full of spunk as ever. She told the most delightful story of how a French bus driver flirted with her recently. (This is one of the top things Polly said she loved about Frenchmen.) I'll always remember the glint in her eye when she told this story. She was a gifted raconteur and will be missed.

6 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Love a la francaise, October 24, 2008

By	Marika Stone "Tiger Lily" (Austin, Texas) - See all my reviews

Any non-steeped-in-the-real-France American girl who imagines that meeting and marrying a French man would be a "happily ever after" should definitely read this book, and even if their person is a 20-something French guy who doesn't seem to be like the men in the book AT ALL, there is this phenomenon after marriage where the person you thought you knew turns into their father. So ... it's worth knowing that American women are often going to run slam-blat! into a huge culture shock with French men, and Platt, an American journalist who's lived in Paris for 30-plus years, outlines exactly what the rough spots might be. I've never dated a French man, (although they've tried to date me) and after I read Love a la Francaise, I was even more glad that I had avoided them. I lived and worked in Paris and Aix-en-Provence, and met a lot of men who seemed to be looking for a little fun on the side, and would I like to go to the country for the weekend with them even though they were married? Uh, no. I stuck to my American boyfriends. I love Platt's books about French culture so much, and I love how she gathers her information and shares it.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A must read for those of us who have experienced it, June 21, 2009

By	I'm not from here - See all my reviews

As a French individual who has spend almost two decades living in the US, I have always enjoyed examining and validating my observations about cultural differences and how they affect us. Polly Platt's first book, "French of Foe?" has been very helpful to that effect. Therefore, as a French men married with (and later divorced from) an American woman, I found myself drawn even more to that this book about Franco-American romantic relationships. And while reading this book I reflected deeply and at numerous times, on both the author's comments and the insights shared by the many interesting people she interviewed.
Relationships are what makes us human (and in my opinion, what makes life so much fun), but they are, at times, so very difficult to understand and manage. What Polly Platt succeeds in making us realize through her book, is that different education, background, personality traits and regional cultures create a certain set of expectations that each of us carry both consciously and unconsciously. That is usually enough to create the constant struggle between two people involved romantically, regardless of culture and gender. She further explains that when you add to this explosive cocktail a country's History and customs deeply intertwined in the social fabric, along with all the sexual undertones between men and women that are proper to the country, you're bound to increase the level of misunderstandings and failed expectations.
While providing no obvious answers, Polly Platt helps us, in her usual humorous tone, reflect intelligently on our beliefs and behaviors and ultimately on ourselves. It might even help a few French-American couples avoid some of the traps I fell into. And that's a big achievement in itself