Most Helpful Customer Reviews
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35 of 41 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
Shame on you, Philip Kaufman!!!, March 1, 2004
Although I wasn't too impressed with the "Twisted" previews, when I saw that Philip Kaufman directed it, I fairly flew into the theater on opening day. Is this the same Philip Kaufman who directed excellent masterpieces like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers", "The Unbearable Lightness of Being", and "The Right Stuff"? If it is, I fear he's been replaced by a pod person. And what did high-grade stars like Ashley Judd, Andy Garcia, and Samuel L. Jackson think when they read this poorly thought-out script?The story, about a newly-promoted homicide cop (Judd) who has peculiar sexual habits and then discovers that, one-by-one, her gentlemen partners are getting beaten to death, does have potential, and one can imagine what someone like Hitchcock could have done with it. But the screenplay and direction are so cliche-ridden and unbelievable, it was truly hard to not laugh all the way through it. There was a moment, when I considered that maybe it was supposed to be a spoof. Humorous moments include Judd's Jessica character repeatedly getting polluted, passing out, and then jumping off the sofa to run immediately to the scene of a crime, without so much as brushing her teeth, but all the while looking like her usual knock-out, gorgeous self. When Jessica comes clean to her superior (Jackson) about her realtionship with the victims, does he think that maybe he should at least TRY to take her off the case, especially since all the bodies are "signed" with a cigarette burn, and Jessica constantly keeps a unlit cigarette with her that she never smokes but taps furiously on tables? Then there's the repeated shots of Jessica's elderly, Oriental neighbor gawking at her through the window, that's thrown into the movie only to go nowhere. Oh, yes, there is also the rest of the San Francisco police department, played by a cast of "actors" who must surely have gotten their parts because they're related to one or more of the producers. Their portrayals of police officers are the most politically incorrect and boorish charicatures you're likely ever to see on the screen. One of the guys, who gives Judd a particularly hard time all through the film, does a turn-around at the end that only a dime-store trash novelist could dream up. The climax and resolution is a fiesta of incredulous humor. I did give the movie two stars: One for Ashley, because she does try her best and looks great; and another star for the beautiful "City by the Bay" scenery.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Sirens anyone?, February 28, 2004
"Twisted" is a howler, a straight-to-video script with three good actors - Ashley Judd, Samuel L. Jackson and Andy Garcia - turning in the worst performances of their career and one pedigree director - Philip Kaufman - shooting a few pretty scenes of San Francisco and then apparently calling it a day. Paramount dumped the movie in late February to catch a few wayward moviegoers suckered by the trailer; instead the studio finds itself up against Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Christ," robbing Judd of her fan base of young, impressionable southern women. That demographic should take heed: This is no "Kiss The Girls" or "Double Jeopardy." It's not even "High Crimes," a more apt title for these lost two hours.Judd, flouting about in a boy's haircut again - no actress gets more mileage out of the exact same look - plays Jessica, a San Fran homicide inspector working her first case with grizzled, creepy partner Mike (Garcia). The murders are the work of a serial killer who burns victims on the hand with a cigarette then beats them to death. The hitch? Every dead guy has had a rough, nameless one-night stand with Jessica, who gulps red wine and conveniently blacks out on the night of the murders from intoxication. The police chief (Jackson) has an interest in seeing Jessica succeed; he has raised the girl since her father, a cop himself, went on a killing spree, shot his wife, then committed suicide. Is Jessica working out her rage during the blackouts? Is it another pining for Jessica's affections? "Twisted" provides about nine possibilities. The screenplay, by Sarah Thorp, raises the stakes in the poker game of tin ears. A lawyer threatens to attack Jessica "with both guns blazing!" Another character exclaims "they put me on the no access list!" The killer, whom I will not reveal, seethes, "I did this for you!" Another murderer who has no relation to the central plot whispers, "You're just like me!" Jackson's character refers to himself as the "master" and likes to preface lines of dialogue with the word "Test!" Basically an exercise in red herrings, Thorp supplies Jessica with a cigarette she does not smoke and Mike, who presumably makes six figures, with a dingy houseboat that might double as a murder house. There are creepy dreams, whispers in the night, voices in the wind, a box stuffed with childhood dolls and murder photos, harassing cops down at the precinct, a crazy ex-lover, an elderly Chinese neighbor in the window, numerous allusions to seals, and a shrink (David Strathairn) who prods Jessica for emotional truth and might as well be listed as "Filler" in the credits. Well, "Twisted" is just an awful motion picture, coherent but preposterous, riddled with the kind of coincidences and misunderstandings only teen comedies usually suffer. Judd, who strode confidently into the movie business with "Ruby In Paradise" and "Normal Life," now seems perfectly content to play the same tomboy sweetheart again and again, all false trust and feisty vulnerability, wounded and bamboozled. She's still cute and quick with a look, but pluck at 35 plays a little different than pluck at 27. Garcia has simply morphed into a ham; he clearly loves it, and will eventually find a role that suits that lifestyle choice. Jackson is an embarrassment in an embarrassing role. Are the parts in "Basic," "xXx" and this movie the ones he wants to make sure rappers don't get?
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
No progress toward wellness for sick puppy Ashley Judd, November 14, 2004
Don't watch this. Don't risk having nightmares about Ashley Judd as I've had. Back when she drug all my sensibilities through the mud with EYE OF THE BEHOLDER, I took a small solace in the assurance that a movie couldn't get any worse than that. But now ghastly Ashley has proven me wrong. I think I'd rather see her play an acknowledged serial killer (however much the the movie pussyfoots around in moral ambiguity about it) than see an equally mad woman legitimized as a cop. Yep, a cop. That's what she plays this time. I guess I must admit EYE OF THE BEHOLDER, as vacuous as it is, seduced me somewhat with Ashley's macabre sick puppy persona. It made me really want to see her get better. Something inside me wanted to see her use her talents (which are nothing if not far above her will to make decent movies) to do something really worthwhile and elevating. So guess that is why I threw caution to the wind and went to see TWISTED. But the cop she plays therein never saw a civil liberty that she wasn't fixing to ravenously trample upon. In the opening scenes, she is arresting a suspect. After she has his hands cuffed behind his back and him helplessly onto his knees, she says, "One more thing!" and then kicks him in the nose as hard as she can! Story resolved, or at least it should have been. Time for this cop to go the way of the beaters of Rodney King. We still do believe that Rodney King was wrongly treated, don't we? Apparently not, if even the limited credibility that this movie has usurped is any indication. She goes on being a cop and treated as the movie's hero! But her unrestrained rampage is by no means over. She will become quite understably a suspect in the murders she's investigating. But she will madly assault her colleagues when they sugggest that it is understandable that she's become a suspect. For better or for worse, the movie never suggests any "turn about's fair play" notion. While she's a suspect nobody ever kicks her in the nose. The movie goes on through a supposed resolution that cannot at all dig this lurid misfire out of the hole of its premise. While the original real villain of the movie proved herself villainous from practically the start, but gets to go on to be "vindicated" as a "hero", the "real villain" gets exposed as a villain only in the end. Do yourself a favor and don't bother with this. It is nonsense. Avoid it.
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