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My Kitchen Wars (Hardcover)

by Betty Harper Fussell (Author) "COME IN, COME IN. I've just made coffee and it smells, as good coffee should, of bitter chocolate..." (more)
Key Phrases: kitchen wars, New York, Mother Fussell, New Jersey (more...)
3.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (9 customer reviews)


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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review
She may be a cookbook author, but Betty Fussell's extra-tart autobiography is no ordinary gastronomic memoir. For starters, her attitude toward cooking ("the one activity, besides tennis, in which housewives were encouraged to excel") is decidedly ambivalent. A chapter entitled "Attack by Whisk and Cuisinart" paints a devastating portrait of entertaining as a competitive sport, in which women who spend weeks planning and executing elaborate dinner parties must "pretend there'd been no labor, no expense, no fatigue, no sweat ... the aim was to look like a hot tomato while remaining cucumber-cool." For another thing, anyone with Fussell's gift for apt metaphor should enjoy chapters like "To Arms with Squeezer and Slicer," or "Invasion of the Waring Blenders," whose titles wittily encapsulate their content and would be wasted on mere recipes or recollections of Chefs I Have Known. Instead, she limns the experience of a generation of women who flung themselves into domesticity after World War II with mixed results, which in the author's case included an ultimately failed marriage to cultural historian Paul Fussell (who is not treated gently here). Smart, funny, even appetizing at times, her book takes one woman's story as a case study of the role food plays in our lives and in our culture. --Wendy Smith

From Publishers Weekly
As befits a noted food historian and writer (I Hear America Cooking), Fussell recounts how the domestic wars of her childhood, marriage and family life played out in a succession of kitchensAin brilliant vignettes marked by appealing humor, biting irony and unflinching honesty. In the house where Fussell was born, the scene of her father's delight in squeezing oranges became, before Fussell was two, that of the death of her high-strung mother, with an open tin of rat poison mutely testifying to the cause. Until Fussell escaped to college, she endured the harsh restrictions of a hostile stepmother whose favorite appliance was the pressure cooker. At school, Fussell concentrated on the primary mission of every girl in the late 1940s: landing a man. When she married Paul, a literature student, the inevitable wedding present of that eraAa Waring blenderAsymbolized the beginning of a sophisticated lifestyle. Paul focused on his career in academe, while Betty enthusiastically embraced her role as wife and mother, and turned entertaining into a competitive sport. In the 1960s, the Fussells' circle turned to erotic excess: Betty recalls drunken wife-swapping and her own illicit affair, and she offers gossipy tidbits about Kingsley Amis and Philip Roth. Paul's book, The Great War and Modern Memory, brought him acclaim but, according to Betty, he continually demeaned her writing efforts. Their marriage failed after his homosexual affair with a student. Fussell was finally able to make her own way using what the French call a "batterie de cuisine" (kitchen artillery), displaying her considerable talents in such publications as the New York Times and nine of her own books. Agent, Gloria Loomis, Watkins Loomis Agency. First serial to the New Yorker; 8-city author tour. (Oct.)
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 238 pages
  • Publisher: North Point Press (October 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0865475776
  • ISBN-13: 978-0865475779
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.6 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #1,058,965 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

9 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
3.9 out of 5 stars (9 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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36 of 38 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Exhausted., December 22, 1999
By sally barry (Liverpool, NY) - See all my reviews
I finishesd this and am exhausted. She lived a lifestyle I had vaguely read about, like the Maoris or Amazon Indians or Eskimos, and all I can think of is, how did she do it 20 or 30 years ago? Life among the "intelligensia", heavy drinking and wifeswapping and cooking the entire gourmet Julia Child repetoire, copper pots and truffles and pate...parties, parties, parties, from 4 to 75. Elaborate French dishes painstakingly prepared from scratch. She even sewed her own dinner gowns, for crying out loud! Trips to France on ocean liners, eating their way through France...studying, writing, intellectual discussion of Shakespeare, adulterous canoodling with a neighbor. I thought the husband was a professor but he must have made a mint - where did she get all the money for all the wine, the exotic ingredients? Where did she get the time, the energy? I am in awe and wonder at this slice of I-don't-know-who's-life. (By the way, the marriage broke up for good when she found her husband with another man, which I saw coming from her very first description of him.) Real food for thought, somesthing like reading farm journals of the pioneer ladies who had to make their own soap, churn the butter, and sew all the family's clothes....how did she do it all? Where did all those guests come from, to all those parties, in costumes yet! How could she possibly raise two children in the midst of this madness, and how did they turn out? (They are given short shrift.) She does not get my sympathy, but I found this book fascinating. I give it four stars for presentation, but am mystified as to what the ingredients are and how they got there.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars from another era, August 8, 2000
As I read this book, my mouth dropped open more and more---not so much because of all the mouth-watering food descriptions, as because it seems like a tale from another time, as remote from my own as Chaucer's stories. Betty Fussell is original and engaging; her work is detailed and sensuous like that of the medieval bard. At one point she quotes an even more famous bard, Shakespeare, "An expense of spirit in a waste of shame," referring to the obsessive amount of time and energy she and her faculty-wife peers spent on their elaborate party meals.

One doesn't have to be overly perceptive to realize how good food became such a priority in her life, as she tells us how all the food was "mush" in her childhood; or to realize that, however odd it may seem, she was relieved, even "euphoric"(her own word) at the loss of her third and last baby, since from an early age, she lacked a loving mother herself.

Most of her book is about the postWWII era, an anomaly in American life, a time of great prosperity when even English professors made very good money and were able to acquire large, lovely houses and to make frequent trips to live for months at a time in Europe. Denied a career of her own in those pre-feminist times, she poured her efforts into cooking and became an "amateur" expert. (She even moaned the invention of the Cuisinart food processor, which made obsolete all those whisks and grates and sieves she had worked so hard to collect.) In an era of outwardly conservative conformity, she tells us of the troubled marriages and casual adulteries that seemed to be the norm in her circle. She had her heart broken twice: By a writer with whom she carried on an affair that lasted years, and by her husband, whom she caught in a homosexual encounter with one of his students.

I love my Cuisinart. I have been a "faculty wife" now for as long as she was, and, like all my friends, my time has been taken up with wider causes than gourmet wooden spoons and garlic presses. Yet my heart goes out to this articulate woman, born less than twenty years before I was, whose life was so constrained and frustrating. There is a wrenching sadness about this book, despite the easy and prosperous era of its setting.

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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining, but mean-spirited, April 13, 2001
By "ruthinportland" (Portland, OR United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: My Kitchen Wars (Paperback)
Fussell's book is entertaining. Her chapter title can make you laugh out loud. I think she might be fun to have as a guest at a party, but that's as close as I would want to get to her.

In this book, Fussell recounts her life story -- leading up to her successful career writing about food. Mostly it's a story of how people did her wrong, from the wickedest of wicked stepmothers who readers could easily envision wielding an axe -- to her atrocious husband, Paul Fussell. Betty Fussell, according to her version of the story, has been surrounded by mean, vicious, cruel people whose main purpose in life was to smother her spirit. Even innocent bystanding neighbors and party guests are not spared her sniping.

The people are so unremittingly awful in her story, that I quit believing a word she had to say about them before I was half way through the book. However, it did get me to read Paul Fussell's memoir as an antidote. It truly was an antidote -- with greater honesty and integrity and more human kindness, compassion and decency.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Best served cold
This is a terrific memoir, intelligent and bitchy and gripping.
Published on November 24, 2002 by rexallsobibor

3.0 out of 5 stars My Kitchen Wars is for not for cream puffs!
This is a war story of a different sort where the warrior is a woman & the battleground is her kitchen. Read more
Published on January 28, 2001 by Rebecca Brown

3.0 out of 5 stars AN ACADEMICAL AUTHOR WHO LIKES TO PARTY
This author and her husband are bright people with untold years of schooling, obviously. First half of the book was more interesting to me as it described her formative years... Read more
Published on August 31, 2000 by Brady Buchanan

5.0 out of 5 stars Relentlessly Honest, Utterly Engaging
The three reviews which precede mine are superb and capture the essence of this startling and engaging autobiography. Read more
Published on April 26, 2000 by David A. Kleist

4.0 out of 5 stars Food is a metaphor for . . . well . . . everything
Betty Fussell is truly a veteran of numerous "Kitchen Wars" in this well-told, fond yet sharp memoir. Read more
Published on February 12, 2000 by Allen Smalling

5.0 out of 5 stars Wars of a Generation
Betty Fussell published her first book, a biography of actress Mabel Normand, in 1982 at the age of 55. Now 72, she has just released her 10th, a memoir titled My Kitchen Wars. Read more
Published on December 7, 1999 by Max Millard

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