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Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well
 
 
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Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well (Paperback)

by Ashton Applewhite (Author) "What happens when women turn into wives?..." (more)
Key Phrases: tableware designer, film archivist, divorcing women, New York, Judith Wallerstein, United States (more...)
4.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (29 customer reviews)

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Frequently Bought Together

Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well + Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship + Coming Apart: Why Relationships End and How to Live Through the Ending of Yours
Price For All Three: $33.41

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Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal
In contrast to those who view divorce and its aftermath negatively, Applewhite (Thinking Positive: Words of Inspiration for People with AIDS, S. & S., 1995) focuses here on the positive effects. Using case histories and well-documented research, she offers a no-nonsense, practical look at women who have come through the process of divorce and feel good about their experiences. The chapters "Law and Lawyers" and "Money and Work" address many legal and financial concerns that offer the reader good direction. Building on her own divorce experience, Applewhite offers comfort, encouragement, and hope to women contemplating the end of their marriages. The book is easy to read and includes an extensive bibliography. Recommended for popular psychology collections in public libraries.?Elizabeth Goeters, DeKalb Coll. Learning Resources Ctr., Dunwoody, Ga.
Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Kirkus Reviews
A divorc‚e enthusiastically explains why shedding one's husband can be the smartest, healthiest move an unhappily married woman can make. Applewhite, a freelance editor and writer, presents a composite portrait of today's strong and resourceful divorced woman, compiled through interviews with nearly 50 women of all ages, incomes, and backgrounds who initiated their divorces. As depicted here, marriage is too often an oppressive arrangement for women, one they can well do without. If Applewhite's figures are correct, three-fourths of today's divorces are initiated by women, and if her analysis of the situation is correct, they are better off, at least psychologically, for having taken the big step. Despite the financial hardship experienced by the women, especially those with dependent children, none regretted having gotten a divorce; indeed, some expressed regret at not having done it sooner. An admittedly unscientific sampling of women--Applewhite appealed for interviewees in The Pennysaver, Romance Writers Report, and other publictions--these confident women eagerly share their experiences of coming to the decision, going through the legal process, coping with the financial consequences, regaining their independence, and parenting and step-parenting. While Applewhite declares that this is not a how-to manual, she offers plenty of practical advice on finding a lawyer, protecting oneself and getting one's money's worth, using a mediator, and the basics of custody arrangements and child support. More significant, though, for any woman contemplating a divorce, is the hearty you-too-can-do-it encouragement that permeates the text. An empowering and comforting message for unhappily married women, but one whose validity is open to debate. ($30,000 ad/promo; author tour; radio satellite tour) -- Copyright ©1997, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Harper Paperbacks (April 7, 1998)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0060928883
  • ISBN-13: 978-0060928889
  • Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.2 x 1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #47,817 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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    #39 in  Books > Health, Mind & Body > Relationships > Divorce

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Customer Reviews

29 Reviews
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22 of 24 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars CUTTING LOOSE is uplifting and honest, July 20, 1997
By A Customer
CUTTING LOOSE takes a fresh, and certainly controversial, look at divorce, incorporating advice, helpful information, and uplifting and honest narratives from fifty or so women who left their husbands. These women are not weighed down by guilt and regret and rightfully so, because clearly they, like many women who divorce, did not take their decision lightly. Many spent months, even years, weighing the consequences before ending their relationships, often consulting a therapist for guidance (while many of their husbands refused marriage counseling). No wonder that despite the pain, the guilt, and sometimes heavy financial losses, these women are doing so well. Moreover, so are their kids. As Applewhite points out, divorce doesn't devastate children; neglectful and inadequate parenting does, and that can exist in intact families. It's about time women in bad marriages had a book that shows them that divorce can be a positive experience in the long run for them, their children, even their husbands.
What a refreshing, positive view of a difficult subject. --Nancy Darrow, well-adjusted child of divorce!
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21 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Very affirming and encouraging, September 5, 1997
Cutting Loose is not a "how-to" manual for women who are contemplating divorce (although it does have helpful information in it), nor is it a book designed to encourage women to initiate divorce. Rather, it is an extremely well-written commentary on the changing roles of marriage and divorce in our society today. Ms. Applewhite explores, with sensitivity, the issues that have led to divorce for a number of women, and how difficult it is, in almost all cases, for the woman to make the choice to leave. She also explores the many and varied feelings that go along with making that decision, many of which are brought on by the pressure of societal views, and what people still see as "right" or "normal", even in these days of supposed equal rights for women. This book took a very tough subject and explored it in great depth. Although it made me sad at times, overall I found this book very affirming and ultimately uplifting, as I read about others in similar situations as mine. I would recommend this book to anyone, married, unmarried, male or female, who is interested in exploring marriage and gaining some insight into why it doesn't always work. And for those of us who initiated our divorces, it's comforting to know we're not out there alone
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19 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars informative, frank and uplifting, September 8, 1999
By A Customer
Our couples counsellor recommended this book to me soon after I made the decision to divorce. It gave me a fresh outlook at a time when I really needed to stop feeling sorry for myself. The book also inspired me to think about the future and all the good things that can come out of confronting and subsequently leaving an unfulfilling relationship.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

1.0 out of 5 stars Not worth the money.
Not worth the money. I am divorced and not better off. Most of the women I know who divorced are not better off. The children are worse off than the parents... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Following the Star

5.0 out of 5 stars Just What I Needed
Even though it was my decision to separate from my husband of 13 years, I anguished for years before I acted. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Sun Goddess

5.0 out of 5 stars Inspirational and comforting...just when you need it
During the darkest period of my life - when nobody seemed to understand me and I couldn't even understand MYSELF - I opened Cutting Loose and found inspiration in the lives of... Read more
Published 12 months ago by Tricia V.

5.0 out of 5 stars Setting the record straight.
As the Bob named in CUTTING LOOSE, who has been in a deeply satisfying relationship with Ashton Applewhite for nearly 15 years, I was startled to learn from these reviews that... Read more
Published 22 months ago by Bob Stein

5.0 out of 5 stars Much-Needed Encouragement
Every woman who has been trapped in a terrible marriage out of guilt and fear, bombarded by all sides with the so-called statistics of divorce damage to society at large, owes it... Read more
Published 24 months ago by J. Nations

5.0 out of 5 stars Liberation!
I had been struggling for almost 6 months with the discovery of my husband's affair when one day I just lost my temper and told him what I really thought and finished with "It's... Read more
Published on February 28, 2007 by G. M. Kisler

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent -- not to be missed by the divorcing woman
When I found this book, I had read so many others since my divorce a year ago -- what I was NOT looking for was yet another book full of anecdotes and others' experiences with... Read more
Published on January 12, 2007 by Summer Roberts

5.0 out of 5 stars salvation
When my daugher was 15-months old I discovered my husband's secret hobby was maintaining a mistress in an apartment down the road from ours. Read more
Published on November 21, 2005 by Eloize

5.0 out of 5 stars onward and out
The world is full of books about how to keep a bad relationship together. Only a few, including Applewhite's Cutting Loose, give support to those of us who've learned the long,... Read more
Published on November 21, 2005 by Pam Carroll

1.0 out of 5 stars Thin on advice.....
I really didn't like this book because it's thin on any advice and long on stories about other women's situations. I couldn't find anything that really related to my own. Read more
Published on October 9, 2005 by S. Heller

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