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Guards! Guards! (Mass Market Paperback)

~ (Author) "This is where the dragons went..." (more)
Key Phrases: lucky arrow, eighth son, Lady Ramkin, Supreme Grand Master, Brother Watchtower (more...)
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (103 customer reviews)
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Product Description

Here there be dragons...and the denizens of Ankh-Morpork wish one huge firebreather would return from whence it came. Long believed extinct, a superb specimen of draco nobilis ("noble dragon" for those who don't understand italics) has appeared in Discworld's greatest city. Not only does this unwelcome visitor have a nasty habit of charbroiling everything in its path, in rather short order it is crowned King (it is a noble dragon, after all...).


About the Author

Terry Pratchett is one of the most popular living authors in the world. His first story was published when he was thirteen, and his first full-length book when he was twenty. He worked as a journalist to support the writing habit, but gave up the day job when the success of his books meant that it was costing him money to go to work.

Prachett's acclaimed novels are bestsellers in the U.S. and the United Kingdom and have sold more than twenty-one million copies worldwide. He lives in England, where he writes all the time. (It's his hobby as well.)

Product Details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 384 pages
  • Publisher: HarperTorch (July 31, 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0061020648
  • ISBN-13: 978-0061020643
  • Product Dimensions: 6.7 x 4 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (103 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #8,382 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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    #11 in  Books > Science Fiction & Fantasy > Authors, A-Z > ( P ) > Pratchett, Terry
    #59 in  Books > Literature & Fiction > Women's Fiction > Single Women
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Front Cover | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
This is where the dragons went. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
lucky arrow, eighth son
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Lady Ramkin, Supreme Grand Master, Brother Watchtower, Sergeant Colon, Captain Vimes, Brother Plasterer, Brother Fingers, Brother Doorkeeper, Corporal Nobbs, Sybil Ramkin, Brother Dunnykin, Lupine Wonse, Watch House, Mended Drum, Lance-constable Carrot, Night Watch, Elucidated Brethren, Unseen University, Goodboy Bindle Featherstone, Sweetheart Lane, The Summoning of Dragons, Pseudopolis Yard, Scoone Avenue, City Watch, Filigree Street
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The Truth by Terry Pratchett
Night Watch by Terry Pratchett
 

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103 Reviews
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4.7 out of 5 stars (103 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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21 of 21 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars The people united can never be ignited!, December 29, 2002
By Daniel Jolley "darkgenius" (Shelby, North Carolina USA) - See all my reviews
(TOP 50 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)      
Discworld really doesn't get any better or funnier than this. For the first time in the series, we get an extended up-close view of life in the remarkable city of Anhk-Morpork. We are introduced to such wonderful characters as Captain Vimes of the City Watch and his singular subordinates Nobby, Colon, and the giant dwarf (adopted) Carrot; the formidable Lady Ramkin; and Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler. The remarkable fashion in which the Patrician Lord Vetinari runs the city is explained in some detail, we begin to really get to know the Librarian of Unseen University (who was of course turned into an orangutan some type back as a result of a magical accident), and Pratchett gives us a basic rundown on the theory of L-Space under which all libraries work and are magically connected.

Everyone knows that dragons do not exist, not the type of giant mythical creatures who fly around breathing fire all over the place. Thus, it comes as something of a surprise to people when Anhk-Morpork begins experiencing incidents of the body-melting variety; such a perpetrator can only be dismissed for so long as a giant wading bird, however. It seems that a group of unimportant have-nots has been wooed into a secret society bent on teaching the haves a lesson or two by magically summoning a dragon to carry out their wishes. Naturally, things get out of hand, and the dragon finds a way to establish permanent residence in reality. Declaring himself king of the city, preparations are made to turn over treasure and begin sacrificing maidens. The City Watch has long been nothing but a joke in town, especially after the establishment of proper guilds virtually eliminated illegal illegality, and Captain Vimes and his men have no desire to enforce the law anyway, unless enforcing the law somehow involves drinking copious amounts of alcohol. Young Carrot (who has just found out he is a human and not a dwarf after all, all six and a half feet of him) amazingly volunteers for the Watch and actually tries to enforce the law, thereby causing a bit of controversy at first. Then the dragon business comes along, and the City Watchmen take it upon themselves to try and overcome the wossname since no one else, aside from the noble swamp-dragon enthusiast Lady Ramkin, seems to offer much resistance at all (even when extolled by Sergeant Colon's rally cry "The people united can never be ignited!"). Of course, the odds of solving such a crisis as this are a million-to-one; odds of a million-to-one guarantees success, as everyone knows, and the problem comes in making sure your plan's chance of success does not miss the mark; it can't be a thousand-to-one or even 999,999-to-one odds because you've never heard of anyone succeeding with those odds against them, now have you?

There is so much that goes to the very heart of the Discworld in this novel that one cannot begin to list it all here. Captain Vimes and the City Watch members are some of the most human characters in the series, and they also happen to be very funny. Virtually everything about this book is terribly funny. The only question I have about this novel is how in the world the inept wizard Rincewind managed to be completely absent from such a dangerous situation as the one represented by the dragon to the city. It's really best that he does not appear in these pages, though, as it would take something away from the incredible appeal of the City Watch characters. If ever a Discworld novel were required reading, it would have to be Guards! Guards! If you can't enjoy this book, then Pratchett's Discworld series is not for you.

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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars My favorite!, December 10, 1999
By wallawallan (Seattle, WA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Guards! Guards! (Paperback)
This is the first Discworld book I read and 24 books later it is still my favorite. The plot is so twisted, and the characters well developed, its a must read! It is a fun series to read and I would recommened to everyone to read this one first. You don't have to read the series in order. Each book can stand alone although there are several "mini-series" of books in the whole series. Guards! Guards! is full of humor yet thought provoking. While you enjoy the story you also realize the point that Mr Pratchett is making about problems in our own world. So buy it now! And enjoy!
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars FABRICATI DIEM, PVNC !, February 20, 2006
"Guards ! Guards !" is the eighth book in Terry Pratchett's hugely popular Discworld series and is the first to focus on Sam Vimes and Ankh-Morpork's City Guard. Although the City Guard was once a fine and noble profession, it has fallen by the wayside in recent years. Once, there had been hundreds of members : as the book opens, the City's Night Watch is staffed only by Sam, Sergeant Fred Colon and Corporal Nobby Nobbs. Like the Night Watch itself, Sam has also fallen on hard times. Having started drinking to forget (it was possibly something to do with a woman), he now drinks to forget the drinking. Despite his faults, though, he's a likeable cynic who has a well-developed sense of fair play and identifies with the underdog.

Things start turning around for Sam and the Watch in "Guards ! Guards !". The force sees a dramatic rise in numbers with the arrival of Carrot Ironfoundersson. Orphaned as a baby, Carrot had been taken in by the dwarfs and raised in a gold mine. Until shortly before he left home, he didn't realise he was human - he'd always thought he was just tall for his species. His adoptive father decides it's best for Carrot to spend some time with other humans and 'manages' to secure a position for him in the Ankh-Morpork City Guard. Carrot, on his arrival, is viewed with some amazement : an actual, honest volunteer. He takes things very literally (as dwarfs tend to do), is very innocent (he wouldn't know what to do with a seamstress if one fell into his lap) and a lot of the humour comes from his utter confusion.

The problem for Sam and the Night Watch is presented by the Unique and Supreme Lodge of the Elucidated Brethren. Well, actually, the problem is its mysterious (and big-headed) Supreme Grand Master, an ambitious and manipulative individual. (The remaining members are bitter, vitriolic, small-minded, jealous, resentful and a bit stupid. As a result, they're very easy to manipulate). He's devised a Machiavellian plan that will involve the removal of the Patrician (Ankh-Morpork's tyrant) and lead to the restoration of the monarchy. Unfortunately, his plan involves the controlling of a very dangerous dragon - to that end, Brother Fingers has managed to 'acquire' De Malachite's book on summoning dragons from the Unseen University's library. For some reason, it doesn't seem to bother him that the book is badly burnt.

This is the first of the Discworld books to feature Sam and the City Guard. As a result, it's a pretty good starting point if you've never read any of the other Discworld books before and want to see what you're missing. Pratchett's books are always very funny and this one gets better as it goes along. Definitely recommended.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Grade-A genius
Captain Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch is not a happy man. He has a thankless job, a bunch of incompetent subordinates and he doesn't get no respect or, more accurately,... Read more
Published 3 months ago by A. Whitehead

4.0 out of 5 stars It all starts here!
This is not the best book Terry Pratchett ever wrote. Nor is it the first. However, if you're going to read Pratchett's books (and you really should. He's a brilliant author! Read more
Published 5 months ago by Stephen C. Coyle

5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful book but...
I wouldn't pay over thirty bucks for the audio book. You can get it cheaper on itunes. In fact, you can get a better price on any of the Pratchett audio books on itunes. Read more
Published 12 months ago by K. Griffin

3.0 out of 5 stars Story excellent, recording defective
The story is excellent, and one of my favorites. The problem with this 10-CD set is the recording: the initial 15 minutes of first disc contains static that makes the sound... Read more
Published 13 months ago by J. McCourt

5.0 out of 5 stars i love this book
out of all of the discworld books this one is my favorite.I love the whole dragon bit and we meet everyone for the 1st time.
Published 17 months ago by PATTY

4.0 out of 5 stars On Guards
Well this is the third of Pratchett's "Discworld" books I've read and probably the last one I'll read for a bit as I have some other stuff to do. Anyway, "Guards! Guards! Read more
Published 19 months ago by BJ Fraser

5.0 out of 5 stars The Best of the Discworld Series!
I'm a huge fan of Terry Pratchett's Discworld series; it's my "guilty pleasure." I started with this one and then had to read all of the books. Read more
Published 20 months ago by Darlene Arden

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilariously funny
I read this book while sitting in the airport, and numerous times I laughed out loud, drawing the odd attention of my fellow passengers. Killed by a metaphor. Read more
Published 21 months ago by Verin

5.0 out of 5 stars Intro to Guards
This is a wonderful book on its own, and serves is a great introduction to the Guards series of Discworld books. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Chris Hall

4.0 out of 5 stars 4 out of 5 librarians agree: "oook!"
This book was just plain fun. It has a decent plot, solid characters, chuckles galore, and Pratchett's usual rapier wit skewering various social subjects. Read more
Published on November 11, 2007 by Matthew Farrell

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