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Staying Connected While Letting Go: The Paradox of Alzheimer's Caregiving
 
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Staying Connected While Letting Go: The Paradox of Alzheimer's Caregiving (Hardcover)

by Sandy Braff (Author)
5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly
In their unflagging dedication to caregiving, spouses of an Alzheimer's patient often neglect their own emotional needs, say the authors of this compassionate volume. Braff, a therapist, and Olenik, formerly a research associate in an N.I.H.-funded study of Alzheimer's caregivers, chart the course of the disease from the caregivers' perspective, gathering stories of how they coped with the diagnosis, the painful progression and finally, their spouse's death. It is these stories that form the backbone of this book. Just as members of a support group share tales of grappling with fear, stress and isolation, so do the voices in this volume: Carolyn mourns the loss of meaningful conversation with her husband; Al misses the physical intimacy; Mamie comes to terms with the fact that her husband no longer recognizes her. The authors eschew direct advice in favor of vignettes that model, they hope, healthy ways of coping. This may frustrate some looking for concrete actions to take, phone numbers to call or other resources to peruse; the overwritten commentary, too, might grate (e.g. the authors want to "clip the wings of and enfeeble the predatory emotional effects" of the disease). But Braff and Olenik care deeply about their subject, and their book will help people struggling with a failing spouse feel part of a large and strong community.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Product Description
This book, laced with poignant stories, focuses on the emotional impact of this disease on the caregivers and offers specific coping strategies they can use to keep them emotionally sane in this chaotic time.

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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 288 pages
  • Publisher: M. Evans and Company, Inc.; 1 edition (January 25, 2003)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1590770129
  • ISBN-13: 978-1590770122
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.3 x 1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #715,943 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

7 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
5.0 out of 5 stars (7 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars From the voices of caregivers................, February 12, 2003
By A Customer
Over the four years during which my brother and sister and I arranged for, and provided, care for our mother, I experienced the soul numbing range of horrors that Alzheimer's disease visits on both its victims and their caregivers.

* The disbelief that my mother could possibly forget that she had asked me the same question three times in 10 minutes, followed by the self-hatred at my anger and lack of understanding.
* The feelings of helplessness and confusion that accompanied our struggles to figure out what would be best for her, and the absence of definitive answers from the medical community.
* The deluded belief at each particular phase of her illness that things couldn't possibly get any worse, only to watch the next descent destroy more of who she was.
* The heartbreaking relief when she smiled at me in recognition when I arrived to visit.
* The innumerable times that I had to pull my car to the curb as I returned home because I was sobbing so deeply that I could no longer see the road.
* And, most of all, the overwhelmingly empty feeling of isolation and solitude.

Now, I watch from a distance as my cousins endure the same horrors in caring for my mother's brother. But they have a reaffirming guide that was unavailable to us. I sent them a copy of Staying Connected While Letting Go.

In our high tech world, we often forget the importance of the individual human story in passing along culture, history, knowledge, and simple wisdom. But to me, the highest value of the human story is to trigger in the listener, or reader, a sense of shared humanity. Recognizing one's own experiences in the story of another person shatters one's sense of isolation. This is the genius of Staying Connected While Letting Go.

Ms. Olenik and Ms. Braff have structured their book around the stories of caregivers, who describe their experiences with their loved ones at successive phases of the illness. Neither the caregivers nor the authors try to sanitize what is frequently the unpleasant reality of facing and reacting to the confusing and disturbing behaviors that can accompany Alzheimer's. As a result, the book has a credibility that will strengthen its appeal to caregivers, while sharing the coping mechanisms of the caregiving community to which they belong.

It's extraordinarily rare to find a book that has such enormous potential to help people who desperately need a sense of community. The authors deserve our thanks!

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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent guide, January 29, 2003
By A Customer
In the family crisis of Alzheimer's, often it is the caregiver who is forgotten. This sensitively-written and compassionate book helps those in this situation cope with things - from the micro to the macro. I highly recommend it, for professionals who are helping the patients and their families, and for the families themselves. Two thumbs up to the authors for a fine piece of work.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A fabulous book!, February 2, 2003
By YVONNE - a caregiver for 15 years (San Diego, CA, United States) - See all my reviews
As a long time caregiver, I wanted to thank you so much for the gift of your wonderful book. It's a continuous support group for Alzheimer's caregivers. There were so many stories and situations I related to, since I experienced some of the same events over time. Having participated in a support group for caregivers for 15 years, I found the book to show great understanding and empathy of caregivers, and to be a real acknowledgement of all the caregivers I have known and learned with over the past 15 years. It's a great resource and will be a wonderful help to all who read it!!

Yvonne - a caregiver for 15 years.

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 		 Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent - - A Must Read for Caregivers
Caring for an Alzheimer's caregiver carries with it a plentitude of difficulties, particularly if the caregiver is a spouse. Read more
Published on January 26, 2005 by Nancy Hendrickson

5.0 out of 5 stars A recommended guide for all Alzheimer's caregivers
The collaboration of licensed therapist and Alzheimer caregiving expert Sandy Braff and Mary Rose Olenik (Staff Research Associate in the Department of Psychiatry, University of... Read more
Published on March 10, 2003 by Midwest Book Review

5.0 out of 5 stars A Compassionate, Practical Look at Alzheimer's Caregiving
This book is like an arm around the shoulders for caregivers, a tremendous encouragement.

Alzheimer's caregiving, and especially end-of-life caregiving, can feel like the... Read more

Published on January 29, 2003 by S. Smith

5.0 out of 5 stars Staying Connected While Letting Go
"Staying Connected While Letting Go", is not the typical book I buy. I received my copy from my sister and co-author, Mary Rose Olenik. Read more
Published on January 23, 2003 by John Tezak

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