This is the dumping ground for things that don't belong in the other threads. For things that go dump in the night....
If you've got an idea for a parody....
If it is an idea that just won't be accepted anywhere else....
If you just want to "don't let's be silly."
Well, don't let's be silly here.
Current topic thread:
I had tons of Lego as a boy. All gone now. That is one toy that's still around, after decades, like Barbie, Mr. Potato Head, Slinky, and G.I. Joe.
I've got it!!! 2001: A Space Spudyssey!
Can you picture it? Barbie and G.I. Joe play the human characters. The whole ship is lego. Once the computer, [SAL 9000 (you have to watch those copyrights!), indicated by a Slinky instead of the red light (the slinky slinks when communicating),] ejects Barbie into space, G.I. Joe is left to face the vortex and the big black lego rectangle!, at which time, on his little bed, he utters "I had tons of Lego as a boy. All gone now. That is one toy that's still around, after decades, like Barbie, Mr. Potato Head, Slinky, and G.I. Joe." And then the final shot of Mr. Potato Head; suspended in space.
our tale continues ...
So, G.I Joe finds a lovely bedroom (slightly girly but he secretly enjoys that), made of Lego, where he will spend his declining years while a sinister computer ("Open the fridge door, SAL") sings American tunes from the 1920's to him.
Barbie, meanwhile, was "rescued" by Dr. Zaius and Cornelius and taken to their planet which she soon discovers is actually a big shopping mall... to her sheer delight. In an upscale fashion shop, Dr. Zaius and Cornelius spend three long hours sitting outside a fitting room while Barbie tries on many outfits. They suddenly notice that her purse, which they are holding for her, is a black rectangle.
Unfortunately, for GI Joe, though the music is good and the ambience just right, the fridge contains only potato products. And although he realizes this is fiction, he can't bear the thought of an eternity of spuds. Thus begins his irrational hatred of the seemingly ubiquitous Mr. Potato. To sooth himself, he steps into something "Slinky" and sings "Mad Dogs and Englishment go out in the Midday Sun"; and other tasty Noel Coward treats.
Meanwhile, for Barbie, the shopping spree continues. Luckily for her, everything is free at the mall, so it is little matter about the loss of her purse's contents. And she is quite taken with the new black rectangle brassiere, which Dr. Zaius and Cornelius present to her. In fact, the low hum that the brassiere seems to emit is quite soothing. The shopping continues.
Unfortunately, for Dr. Zaius and Barbie, Cornelius was none other than "Yukon Gold" Cornelius; tamer of the Abominable and formidable henchman and spy of Mr. Potato. It was their diabolical plan to keep Barbie shopping, while they dealt with GI Joe. But what they hadn't counted on was that even Barbie could get bored of shopping. "All of the clothes are free", she lamented, "so there is no snob factor. But what else am I good for, but for trying on clothes?"
The man who knew the answer to that was light years away; making shapes on his Etch-a-Sketch. "All it makes are right-angled shapes" he observed. "There must be something in it." He wondered, did it have something to do with the black slab of lego that stood before him? Could the answer be found in dismantling the Etch-a-Sketch?
It would have to wait until he'd finished "watching Hyacinth", as he called it,
for Keeping Up Appearances was on. There was nothing GI Joe liked better than echoing Hyacinth as she bellowed ... "It's Sheriddaaaannnnn." Then again, GI Joe did like staring at his own slim-line, white, automatic redial telephone, and imagine someone calling him. It had happened once, ages ago, but it was someone who wanted Chinese take-away. If he only had a Mercedes, sauna, and room for a pony, he thought.
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