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What age do you stop buying nieces/nephews gifts?


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Showing 126-150 of 213 posts in this discussion
In reply to an earlier post on Feb 17, 2012 7:07:32 PM PST
Frankie says:
I don't see anything wrong with stopping the gift sending at a certain age but I do believe that you should have talked with them a head of time (as adults) so they would not be expecting something... You feel they are adults then you should have treated them as adults... You must feel bad for the way you handled it or you would not even be asking this question... Even YOUNG adults have feelings and I assure you not only have they talked about this but there were hurt feelings at the time no matter what is said or done after the fact...

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 17, 2012 9:24:18 PM PST
Melissa says:
Unless your like my family and have around 30 nieces and nephews. (I have 9 Aunts and Uncles) That's $300-600 a year on Birthdays, not to mention Christmas :O Lol

Posted on Feb 17, 2012 11:32:46 PM PST
Judi Fryer says:
I'll stop buying them Christmas and Birthday gifts when one of us passes away or I become mentally incapable of making decisions. I love my neices and nephews (blood, great-niece or nephew, those by marriage, and those that live with my brother's family by way of being exchange students. I love them all and want to remember them at holidays.

Posted on Feb 18, 2012 3:48:23 AM PST
Frankie says:
Buy them gifts or not... My point is that don't just stop on half of the children (young adults) in the household with out speaking to them and explaining your own (PERSONAL) reasons...

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 18, 2012 7:23:49 AM PST
PZAZ says:
I agree that it's not "sad" to think about stopping giving, especially if you don't get thank you cards! I can't believe how most people are telling you to just keep buying gifts. I say it ends around 18 - 20 yrs old but let them all know so they don't take it personal. Our family stopped shipping gifts because of the high cost. It was costing more to ship than the actualy gift cost. It's hard in these times to come up with the extra money at Christmas. I like how you handled it because I think it's exciting to get anything and hopefully they appreciate it. Also, it's their parent's fault for not making them send thank-you cards since they were young. My daughter has to send a thank you note within 2 weeks of receiving any gift and she doesn't mind whatsoever because that's normal to her. I very rarely get a thank-you note from even the adults.

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 19, 2012 2:45:41 AM PST
Charles says:
I think 15 yrs old is too young. They`re still kids..In my family the age is 22 or when they get out of college!!

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 19, 2012 3:02:44 AM PST
Charles says:
I have NEVER heard A 12 yr old is not a kid!! A 12 yr old IS a KID!! YOU`RE CHEAP!!!I`m so glad Your NOT in MY Family!!

Posted on Feb 19, 2012 3:17:45 AM PST
we stop when they bring a date.....or go less. Totally stopwhen they have kids.

Posted on Feb 19, 2012 3:38:37 PM PST
Asuigeneris1 says:
If you don't like them, don't buy them anything...if you do like them, at the very least send them a card.

Posted on Feb 20, 2012 7:18:24 AM PST
Ellie S says:
When they graduate from high school or drop out.

Posted on Feb 20, 2012 7:24:52 PM PST
My husband got birthday gifts from his aunts (who had no family of their own) until we had children (around 25). However, those same aunts suddenly have the non-married kids (2) and 7 grand-neice/nephews to buy for, so they have since decided to do name drawing for the adults (single or not) and just make sure they buy for kids. By the time I had my first job I already had 13 neices/nephews (youngest of 7 siblings, does that to a person) and never did by for them. I did take them out to eat, brought a few to my dorm room when I was in college so they could 'shop in the big city' (woo hoo!) or invited one or two over as it was convenient. You really don't need to buy for everyone in your life. And I didn't feel the need to make sure I spent $3 on each of them if I took one out for a blizzard. Some of them lived close enough to have a greater impact/more interaction/etc, and some of them lived far away but kept in contact better than others. It is natural to be closer to some extended relatives than others and I guess my thought would be, when you see something that fits in your budget that you KNOW one of them would truly like, get it! This does mean that the ones you have a closer relationship will likely benefit more from your finances/gift giving/invitations lunch/icecream/coffee whatever, but that is natural. None of my neices/nephews have had a problem with the fact that I am constantly talking books with one of them and child-rearing with teh one that's raising kids, or otherwise tailoring my interactions with them based on shared interests/close relationships. Money doesn't grow on trees, families grow bigger, life happens, young adults can understand that... or they need to grow up a little more.

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 20, 2012 8:03:50 PM PST
KKehler says:
Same exact same thing happened to me - and with 18 years of no written-even emailed thanks yous for $100 each amazon certificates every Christmas as they lived several states away and spent holidays dealing with divorce arrangements of multiple families. I stopped when the youngest turned 18 this year. The older one got married in June and I sent $200 in certificates - and didn't get a thank you for that either - and not the only one. I think they believe that me seeing wedding photos on facebook was enough. So sad. amazon is going to lose too! lol . . .

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 21, 2012 2:10:37 PM PST
I can't believe that you are suggesting that the giver is the one who is obligated to act as an adult and that these poor little kids are the only ones with hurt feelings--"children" aged 18 & above should have retained SOME manners by that time & they should act as adults and say thank you in some way. So many people complain that todays youth acts "privileged" and ungrateful--it is caused by adults pamper them, don't teach them manners and let them get away with it. If they can't figure out why the gifts stopped then, besides being ungrateful they are also not too bright. Stop giving them excuses.

Posted on Feb 24, 2012 8:13:10 AM PST
[Deleted by the author on Feb 24, 2012 8:14:26 AM PST]

Posted on Feb 26, 2012 10:26:05 AM PST
melee says:
I come from a very large family ( 6 brothers and 2 sisters). By placement I am the youngest female child and 2nd to the youngest overall. My oldest niece just turned 40. My youngest niece is just about to turn 11. Of course, I have several GREAT nephew and nieces as well, the oldest is 13 the youngest is just 3 months old with 3 pending for this Spring. Then I have my husbands family- he only has 1 sister, THANKFULLY, and she has 3 kids of her own. This is what I have done or rather tried to do; at the very least they all get a card aknowledging their birthday usually sent through the mail, sometimes they get a gift (gift cards, actual gifts, or mone), it depends on my financial situation at the time and the birthday. We do not celebrate Christmas all together, thankfully because I could never afford that. Graduating high school, college gets them $50-$100. Newborns usually get baby NEEDS, diapers, wipes, you know baby stuff. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM however, I do not always agree with them and the paths they have chosen to folllow. I try not to penalize them for that but I am human and sometimes I do. It is a rare day that I receive any thank you from the majority quite the opposite as matter of fact. This is a sore spot for me because I have my own children and the gift giving or even birthday acknowledgement has not been reciprocated by my siblings or nieces and nephews unless I have a party for my kids which cost me a small fortune given the number of people that show up. My daughters 16th birthday party last summer cost me over $500 for food and some party games, over 50 people showed up at my house for this party , all were relatives and friends of relatives as she lives with her dad out of state and has no friends here. I have told everyone attending all of my children's parties that they did not need to bring a gift, but if they wanted I offered suggestions to what they would like per their requests. I acknowledge all these birthdays because I WANT to, not out of obligation. It makes me feel good, if it's not going to make me feel good, then I don't do it...ie drug using nephew who hasn't spoken to me for several years and I have no idea where he lives, I don't send him anything, he is in his 30s. His sister, my 40 year old neice whom I speak to quite often and occasionally get together with gets a card and some type of gift usually. See what I mean...? The bottom line is if I want to acknowledge their birth I do and I do it out of my love for them and how it makes me feel, not so much for them or how it makes them feel. As a rule I have learned not to expect anything in return and thats OK with me. Hope that helps... Good Luck!

Posted on Feb 26, 2012 2:55:23 PM PST
I stopped giving my nephews gifts when they were in high school when they decided to GLARE at me (for not giving them cash in high denominations) and gave them gift certificates and candy instead. And they were eating the candy while they glared at me.
Yeah, it stopped there.

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 26, 2012 4:43:35 PM PST
sky says:
let all of your friends and family know after the age of 18 , no more gifts

In reply to an earlier post on Feb 26, 2012 4:44:55 PM PST
sky says:
let all of your friends and family know after the age of 18 no more gifts

Posted on Feb 28, 2012 1:22:34 PM PST
John Dye says:
I never stop giving family gifts. As they outgrow toys they begin getting more adult things like jewelry and items for their homes.

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 4:38:26 PM PDT
My nephew is only 9 right now, so it's not really an issue for me yet, but my sister always gets me gifts, so I would feel bad not getting her son a gift even if he was a teenager. I say, 18 is the cut-off...unless your niece or nephew gets you gifts. In that case, you should return the favor, of course.

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 15, 2012 8:01:49 PM PDT
I am 36 and my auntie still buys me gifts, maybe its just us, but we are close like that. I say you buy them gifts if its in your heart, don't feel obligated skip it till you want to.

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 9:14:27 PM PDT
We stopped getting gifts for the nieces/nephews when they stopped sending thank you cards. Figure if they won't do that, they don't appreciate the gift enough to send 'em anything.

Posted on Mar 16, 2012 5:20:37 PM PDT
Marie says:
I do not think you should stop sending them gifts, maybe not spend as much money on them but a simple inexpensive gift at least to show you care. You are never to old for presents!

Posted on Mar 18, 2012 9:13:24 PM PDT
I will probably stop buying when they are about ten.

Posted on Mar 21, 2012 3:28:29 AM PDT
Spencer says:
Never stop! They are your family members. I suggest if you live far away from them, or you don't see them a lot, then keep on sending them. If not, and I hate to say it, they'll forget about you. Gifts are the best way for them to keep you in their heart. It doesn't even have to be over $15!
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Discussion in:  Gift Idea forum
Participants:  152
Total posts:  213
Initial post:  Dec 16, 2011
Latest post:  Nov 14, 2013

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