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The Funkadelic Freestyle Substitute Teacher

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Showing 1-23 of 23 posts in this discussion
Initial post: May 9, 2012 3:16:22 PM PDT
Okay.....The Funkadelic Freestyle Lounge is dead...long live the Funkadelic Freestyle Lounge!!! I am NOT designating this the official replacement, but an interim mechanism on which we can vent until an officiial lounge replacement is hit upon. Got it?

Okay then.....

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 3:21:01 PM PDT
Do you have a license for that thing?

Posted on May 9, 2012 3:30:52 PM PDT
License? I don't need no steenkin' license!!

Posted on May 9, 2012 3:34:43 PM PDT
C. J. Vasta says:
Somebody already has an alibi.

Posted on May 9, 2012 3:38:35 PM PDT
Savage Lucy says:
It was Colonel Mustard in the study with the wrench.

No! It was Professor Plum!

I said Plum!

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 3:38:52 PM PDT
Louise says:
David, are you tipsey? :)

Posted on May 9, 2012 3:41:25 PM PDT
Louise says:
I am craving chocolate - but trying to resist. I'm going to eat a banana instead. I wish it was dipped in chocolate.....

Posted on May 9, 2012 3:42:44 PM PDT
Savage Lucy says:
That's not the only thing I'd like to dip in chocolate...

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 3:47:12 PM PDT
I'm not tipsey, nor am I Nipsey.

There's a male strip joint north of Boston called, I'm told, The Golden Banana. Have never had any interest in visiting the place, but I know women who've been there. Fresh produce is a healthful thing, and potassium is an essential nutrient.

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 3:49:55 PM PDT
Last edited by the author on May 9, 2012 4:02:14 PM PDT
Louise says:
mmmm, please excuse me for typing with my mouth full.
Yes I have no bananas, so eaten an orange instead.

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 3:56:57 PM PDT
That's what I mean. He can't have a piece of meat like that without a license.

Posted on May 9, 2012 5:27:55 PM PDT
I always wondered, why isn't the song title "No, We Have No Bananas"?

If you ask a restaurant reservation agent whether she has a table available for 7 PM, she doesn't say "Yes, we have no openings then." Right?

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 7:35:05 PM PDT
Last edited by the author on May 9, 2012 7:38:48 PM PDT
Hikari says:
"No, We Haven't Got Any Bananas" doesn't fit with the melody very well.

Much less "We Apologize for any Inconvenience But Due to Poor Growing Conditions, Bananas are Temporarily Out of Stock."

"Yes, We Have No Bananas" sounds weird to a Western ear, but is actually a very Oriental way of thinking. One seeks to soften the blow of not having any bananas by phrasing the bad news in the affirmative.

>>>Sumimasen, ga . . Ba-na-na ga arimasu ka?

(Excuse me, do you have bananas?)

>>>Ah, chotto arimasen, kedo . . . .

(Oh, I'm sorry . . .but we're a little out. (yes, they actually say this.)

>>>Ah, so desuka? Ba-na-na ga arimasen ka?

(Is that right? You have no bananas?)

>>>Hai, arimasen.

(Yes, we don't.)

So, that's a long way 'round . .but if you want to master Japanese, you must train your mind into thinking that Yes, we have no bananas sounds perfectly natural. One is expressing agreement with honorable customer's astuteness in determining that there are no bananas on the premises.

Posted on May 9, 2012 8:08:14 PM PDT
Q says:
like a compliment sandwich...with bananas.

Posted on May 9, 2012 8:08:39 PM PDT
Q says:
David, we already have a lounge.

Posted on May 9, 2012 8:13:15 PM PDT
I was always lucky with substitute teachers. On the whole, they were young, pretty, and didn't give a stuff if we did the days work or not.

The worst though was the rare time that a substitute couldn't be found and the headmaster would step in. Never a good thing for us "back row" trouble-makers.

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 9:32:05 PM PDT
Jonathan says:
Re: lucky with substitute teachers

I remember in the 7th grade (I was 12 then,) we had a substitute for three days in English class. We convinced her that on such occasions, we were allowed to watch any movie we wanted, and I happened to have a tape of 'Candyman' in my backpack. It went over so well, we watched '80s horror movies for the other two days. Much of which featured ample amounts of blood and boobies.

Posted on May 9, 2012 9:54:31 PM PDT
Louise says:
SPOILER!!! Please do not read if, like me, you have never seen Citizen Kane.

I didn't know Rosebud was a sled.

I haven't read the book, and all these years have thought I must watch it soon (the film not the book).

(I have read lots of Peanuts cartoon books though.)

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 9:55:25 PM PDT
I used to have an exceptionally lazy History teacher who would play movies all the time. Stuff like 'Breaker Morant', 'The Kelly Gang', 'Kokoda Front Line', 'Picnic at Hanging Rock', 'Gallipoli', and 'The Lighthorsemen'. Always used to look forward to History class. Remembering it now, the teacher used to whistle his S's, and he would only ever call me Sloan, so every time he said my name he would whistle. Every one would crack up. Maybe after years and years of titters due to his whistle, he had just given up.

In reply to an earlier post on May 9, 2012 10:00:25 PM PDT
Louise says:
Did he sound like the beaver in Winnie The Pooh? :)

In reply to an earlier post on May 10, 2012 4:23:31 AM PDT

I knew a guy in college who recommended that if you must disagree with somebody, you should say "Yes, but...."

Interesting theory. I have occasionally deployed it. But it has its hazards:

"David, you are a pederast and an octopus-fondler and you stuff Barbie doll tutus in your underpants every chance you get."

"Yes, but...."

In reply to an earlier post on May 10, 2012 4:42:50 AM PDT
Last edited by the author on May 10, 2012 4:43:22 AM PDT

I'm reading a funny book titled "Would It Kill You To Stop Doing That?", about manners. The author tells a story about being in a Japanese convenience store, and he broke four bananas off of a bunch of them and took them to the counter, whereupon the counter guy was appalled. He wouldn't sell him the bananas, and he put them on a shelf behind him, alongside other somehow compromised produce. Then he rolled his eyes at a colleague, as if to say "Get a load of this roundeyes....trying to impose an alien form of portion control!!"

So I think I just might abstain from bananas altogether if I ever visit Japan. Too many problems!!!

In reply to an earlier post on May 10, 2012 5:30:07 AM PDT
Hikari says:
That's funny. In all my years there, I never saw that particular gaijin breach of etiquette. Actually any bananas I saw in the 7-Eleven (which they have, along with their mom-and-pop type places, were sold singly.

"Compromised produce!"

Japanese version of "Clerks"

A: Sa, ano gaijin baka-darou, ne.
B: Eh!

>>>Hey, that foreigner, what an idiot.
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This discussion

Discussion in:  Movie forum
Participants:  9
Total posts:  23
Initial post:  May 9, 2012
Latest post:  May 10, 2012

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