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Customer Discussions > Parenting forum

6 year old boy feels like no one likes him


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Showing 1-7 of 7 posts in this discussion
Initial post: Dec 18, 2008 4:35:16 PM PST
Julie 2 says:
My son is 6 and in the first grade. He is having troubles with friends at school. There is 1 other boy he really likes to play with, but there is a 3rd boy in the mix. Now all three of them are fighting and the teacher has to separate them. They have even seen the school counselor about this issue. I don't know what to do. My son is so sad, he says he has no friends. The three boys aren't allowed to play together anymore (until they work out their issues). Of course, they all blame the other person. I have tried to talk to him, but I don't know what to say. I know he is lonely. He is an only child and he is very sensitive to what he believes others think about him. It drives me crazy. I do not want to raise a whiny kid who no one wants to play with! He is a nice little boy.

In reply to an earlier post on Dec 18, 2008 5:36:41 PM PST
LEP says:
I am the parent of an only child too. My son is also very sensitive. We have worked hard to cultivate lots of friendships in our neighborhood and in his activities such as scouts and sports teams because they have a shared interest. We invite children to our house and on outings to locations such as the park. This has helped our son develop lots of friendships so he always has someone to play with. In addition, because he is an only child his friends love to come to our house because they don't have to deal with siblings, they can decide what to play, etc. I urge you to honor his feelings of sadness and offer concrete suggestions such as how he can go up to other children and initiate playing together at recess and setting up afterschool and weekend play dates. I hope this helps. Our son is now 10 and very happy to have many friends, including several extremely close friends. I bet the same will be true for your son.

In reply to an earlier post on Dec 18, 2008 9:12:39 PM PST
How about group activities? Does your son have interests, such as art or sports? Perhaps enrolling him in a group where he can do things he enjoys with others will help him over this current hurdle. As he develops skills and prowess in certain areas of interest, his confidence will rise.

In reply to an earlier post on Dec 19, 2008 6:43:33 AM PST
Last edited by the author on Dec 19, 2008 6:49:30 AM PST
Cheryl F. says:
Maybe you could invite just the one boy over to play - obviously the inclusion of the third boy was not good for the original relationship. It's the old two's company, three's a crowd thing and children are not equipped to handle those dynamics. The last thing I would be worried about is raising a whiny kid - his feelings are way more important than that. Your son is hurting and it's hard to know how to help. Kids always think it's the end of the world and to them it is so you have to respect that and validate his feelings.

One postscript: I am an only child also - people like to accuse only children of being "spoiled" and I guess sometimes that's true, but mostly it's just real lonely being an only kid and can make establishing relationships with others a lifelong problem. Filling up a kid's life with 'things' sometimes only accentuates the loneliness. Even now, as an almost elderly person with no parents left, I wish so hard that I had a brother or sister.

In reply to an earlier post on Dec 19, 2008 9:55:07 AM PST
Julie 2 says:
Thank you for your reply. One problem is that we live out in the country and there are not a lot of kids around. One of the boy's in the three's a crowd group lives 2 doors down so they like to play together, unfortunately, since school started they can't even play together for more than 2 hours without arguing. I work full-time as well, so that makes playdates difficult. I know we need to work on this more. He played soccer in the past and he liked it, but he was still a loner out on the field. He just doesn't seem to relate to kids his own age. He likes being around older kids. I hope things will get better.

Posted on Nov 9, 2012 8:05:52 AM PST
[Deleted by Amazon on Dec 13, 2012 5:41:23 PM PST]

In reply to an earlier post on Jan 18, 2013 8:45:21 PM PST
Wende Best says:
"Become Yourself" Workbook: Student Journal
I have empathy for you. Read my son's story and the advice. It works. I started talking to my child from the day he was born.
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Discussion in:  Parenting forum
Participants:  6
Total posts:  7
Initial post:  Dec 18, 2008
Latest post:  Jan 18, 2013

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