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2010 Novel & Short Story Writer's Market
2010 Novel & Short Story Writer's Market
by Alice Pope
Edition: Paperback
82 used & new from $0.01

4.0 out of 5 stars (Seemingly) Helpful to Newcomers, November 15, 2010
I have never before vied for publication and am totally new to the conventions of the publishing market. Coming from this background, the "2010 Novel & Short Story Writer's Market" has been a comprehensive, accessible resource for me. In addition to its extensive listing of presses, journals and publishers, and its attendant informational blurbs about what each publication specializes in and is looking for, the book also contains numerous articles about different aspects of the literary market, whether it be writing, genre, or whathaveyou. In all, a diverse book covering many basic bases that has helped me know where to begin and has made it seem doable. Fully recommended.

Dream Big
Dream Big
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Smile Empty Soul wishes they were this cool, September 12, 2005
This review is from: Dream Big (Audio CD)
There is honestly no other band on planet earth that can compare this band to. Stylistically, musically, and on a sheer entertainment level, Ryan Shupe and the Rubberband are wholly their own.

Each song has a fantastic lead guitarline that fits the the other instruments like a glove. Violins, banjos and mandolins are smothered everywhere on this record, and the band honestly can outplay a huge bulk of most country, rock or pop artists that get lots of radio rotation; the focus is not a perfect hummable hook (though this record has got that in spades); the quality of the music and the musicianship as a whole flowing entity is what fuels the greatness of this group.

Many of these songs have excellent, thick and jumpy bass beats, melding a blend of styles together to create a dazzling listen. Honesty, if you listen to the the banjo solo in "Simplify," you'd swear you were listening to Pearl Jam's Mike McCready unplugged! Amazing stuff!

Ryan's vocals are completely different from what you'd typically hear from ANYONE; it sort of like he's speaking or shouting the lyrics in a melodic way... but it's very smooth and it truly sounds great on this record! His lyrics are often playful and 'feel-good,' but they can truly be very comforting at times (see "Rain Falls Down").

My favorite song would have to be "Even Superman," simply because it's sort of soft and quiet, but it's so exciting and bouncy at the same time. Again the musicianship is remarkable, and I honestly think anyone could appreciate this type of music if they'd give it a shot!

"Banjo Boy" has long been a RS&RB fan favorite, and it seems very fitting to be placed on the tip of their major label debut. Songs like "Would You Love Me" and "Dream Big" are lush and beautful, and Ryan's voice seems to gleam brightly with even more intensity then the his alarmingly bald head!

Before I depart, I must tell that if Ryan and the Boys are passing through your town, YOU WOULD BE THE BIGGEST IDIOT IN THE WORLD TO MISS THEM!!!! They are an INSANE live band! The songs are all at least 3 minutes longer due to extensive and INTENSE jams, recalling the stage presence of bands like Phish or Dave Matthew's Band.

Some songs go on for 9 or 10 minutes with NEVER A DULL MOMENT... at the last show of theirs I went to, they were about 5 minutes into one of their older songs and then they broke out into the main riff of AC/DC's classic "Back in Black!!" I tell ya, you haven't lived until you've heard that song on vilons and freaking MANDOLINS!! Insane as it sounds, it rocked just as hard and purely as AC/DC could've ever done it.

These guys are just so INTO their music, and what makes that so cool is that it doesn't seem like any popular groups right now are really FEELING it, you know? Instead of trying to build the next generic pop/country/rock hit, these guys go to town on their intruments and have FUN. For that alone, "Dream Big" is worth your money.

5 STARS!!!!!

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9 of 13 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars More than the average Slipknot, January 12, 2005
This review is from: Recoil (Audio CD)
Have you ever had one of the those days where for some reason you sprang from your carnivorous slumber harboring a mad craving for the most disgustingly crappy music imaginable so you can write a p!ssed-off reveiw on Amazon JUST CUZ!!? Well last week I got `the spring' and sprung to Wal-Mart, eagerly searching for some selection that would surely splatter my inner earlobes with endless torrents of sticky brown feces. My radar zoomed upon "Recoil" and all of the album artwork's uber-pretentious magnificence, so I snatched it right up like a marsupial lizard snatches up hair lice in a swimming pool, a phrase which here means "casually".

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm about to bash this album in a literary fashion equal to that of a monster truck, ripping apart your favorite album by your favorite band like it was string cheese in Fat Albert's lunch bag, aren't you? Well, if I were reviewing Breaking Benjamin's "Saturate" for the FIFTH CONSECUTIVE TIME, then I would congratulate you on your sweet guessing skills. But since I'm NOT, and also since this album by Nonpoint is actually pretty decent, you should know that you're completely wrong. Then again . . .

The things that are wrong with this album are the things that are wrong with nu-metal in general. It's derivatively generic and full of emotional poo. It has the pathetic political clichés and eye-rollingly angered themes of every Converse-wearing teenager this side of Nirvana. And really, it's just downright retarded. But there is something that manages to separate Nonpoint from most of their segregated affiliates, and that something spells its name like this: DEPTH. When you listen to this album, it isn't really about the loud music or the loud singer or the loud, re-repeated messages; it's about honesty, it's about heart, it's about conviction, and it's about genuine feeling.

Now when I say DEPTH, I don't mean, "oh my heavens, Nonpoint is the next TOOL!!!!!" or any silly thing like that. I mean that "Recoil" takes everything to hate about nu-metal, slaps it in the face and says, "THIS is how we discuss these important things", and turns it into something (dare I say it) worthwhile. Every lyric rings true, every chord breathes honesty (sometimes), every song transpires a yearning desire for change, to make a difference, to make sure people know what's up in this world. And even if I may not agree with a lot of their views, I can certainly respect their mode of telling me.

But all that honesty crap aside, I still find myself enjoying the MUSIC on this album a little bit more than I ever thought I could. I mean really, how can anyone say no to a nu-metal band that covers PHIL-freakin-COLLINS?!?!?! Without doubt, the highlight track on this album for me is `In the Air Tonight', which has long been my favorite Collins tune, only this time huge guitars are slamming around and chemical reactions explode magically, making this probably one of the best Collins covers I've ever heard (though admittedly, I don`t think there ARE any other Collins covers). And even outside of that song, there's plenty of sweet jams on this record, starting with the huge crunch of `the Same' and staying pretty strong throughout the rest of the record. There's a lot of overused, repetitive power-chorded sections, but I'm mostly enjoying myself the whole time.

Loud, heavy, urgent. It's all been done before, and much better, no question about it. Yet, when I give my attention to "Recoil", I give it ALL my attention, generic poo aside. In short, "Recoil" challenges the listener more than the average Slipknot. 3 stars.
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Oct 9, 2012 11:54 AM PDT

Payable on Death (with Bonus DVD)
Payable on Death (with Bonus DVD)
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Amazingly, this influenced my superior taste in music :-), January 5, 2005
One day, I wanted a cd. A really good cd that I would really really like. So I went out and for some reason chose to purchase "Payable On Death", which was amusing because all that I'd heard from the album was `Will You', which I thought was pretty cool, BUT the other tracks that I'd heard from P.O.D. like `Alive' and `Youth of America' just sorta made me grind my teeth together and say, "AAUUGGHHH!", mostly cuz I thought that they just plain sucked. So really, there was no reason for me to buy this thing, and at first I was admittedly disappointed with it, but something about it made me keep listening, and it just kept on growing and growing on me until, for some reason, I found myself loving this thing. Isn't that nuts?!?!?

What I didn't at first understand was how the melodies worked on this album. When I bought this, I had a real thing for all sorts of catchy, loud music from bands like Fuel or Linkin Park, or the less heavy Goo Goo Dolls. The music those bands produce simply BLEEDS with pop hooks and catchy everything, and that's what I was sorta hoping to get with "Payable On Death". I didn't get that at all, but I did find myself admiring music in a much different way than I ever had before, and understanding something about melody and song structure that I never understood. Amazing that all this came from a band that I had basically ignored since the fist dull power chords of `Alive', isn't it?

At first, melodies just don't seem to work on this album, and I really felt that strongly as opening track `Wildfire' boomed into my ears. What is this? What's this riff doing? It's huge, no doubt, and loud as a microwaved fart, but the chords just didn't seem to go together at all, and it just sounded goofy. And Sonny's vocals on this song freaked the crap outta me; his Jamaican-esque vocals go all over the place, from a crazy high pitched shrieking verse to a not *instantly*, but *eventually* catchy chorus that I really didn't know what to think of. I felt the same about most of the other tracks that followed. None of them were too `catchy' for me, nothing was very musically sensible, nothing was grabbing my attention. NOTHINGGGGG!

But subtly, like a prowling puma, P.O.D. snatched me up. Each track has something SWEET going for it: it can SEE these melodies now; I can FEEL them working into me; I FEEL Sonny's vocals in my heart and soul; and I have discovered an unexpected, but REMARKABLY beautiful album in "Payable On Death". Now I love `Wildfire' in all of it's craziness. I truly enjoy `Will You' more than ever before, and is one of the most emotive song to be found one here. `Execute the Sounds' is immensely fun in all aspects, be it lyrically, vocally, musically, whatever. Songs like `Find My Way' and `Asthma' are fantastic, musically powerful gems on this album, and the jaw-droppingness of the instrumental closer `Eternal' is the surprising kinda thing I LOVE to discover on my albums. The other tracks have varying strengths, and all of them are very enjoyable listens.

This isn't really a ground-breaking record or anything, but for some reason it challenged me enough that I could feel and gain a ferocious appreciation for music by Finch, Tool, and even Pearl Jam, among others. It really doesn't sound like it makes any sense, but give "Payable On Death" a shot, and you'll see what's up. 4 stars.

Human Clay
Human Clay
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2 of 3 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars "the beautiful loves no one...", January 4, 2005
This review is from: Human Clay (Audio CD)
This cd has sold eleven MILLION copies. Isn't that absolutely disgusting? This is just my personal opinion, but I hardly think this album deserves that kind of success. I mean don't get me wrong, I think this is a GOOD cd, but it is certainly nothing incredible.

On "My Own Prison", everything was simply superb. Every musical aspect, ESPECIALLY Tremonti's guitar, was fantastic and worthy of the kind of praise it got. But unfortunately, "Human Clay" shows a regressive step musically and artistically for Creed. This SHOULD'VE been a `sophmore slump', but I guess, based on album sales, generic poo is what the world prefers.

The first problem is Scott Stapp, who he sounds like he's trying to inflict some sort of Maynard James Keenan-ish mysticism to his vocals, which is alright, but it isn't nearly as effective here as he seems to think. Musically, the rest of this album is worthlessly generic, using repeated power chords and bashing loudness to hide an obvious lack of originality. It all FEELS too similarly boring and fake that at one point you'll just wish the album was six tracks long instead of 11. And yes, `Arms Wide Open' is something that bores me to tears nowadays.

I'd say the best tracks here are `Beautiful' and `Say I'. These are the only two tracks that take the `new' aspects(Maynard style vocals, more power chords) and create utterly fantastic songs. Other tracks that tickle my fancy are `What If' and 'Faceless Man', but really, they're not all they could be.

But in all, this album is definitely NOT all it's cracked up to be. A few good songs isn't enough for 4 stars. If there was any justice in this world, that 11 million albums sold would belong to Fuel or the Foo Fighters something timeless, rather than generic poo. 2.5 stars. But I don't know why I'm writing this, since even *I* own this album, as well as everyone else on the planet.

Wow. This is my shortest review. :-)

We Are Not Alone
We Are Not Alone
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11 of 33 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars NO!! they certainly ARE NOT alone!!, January 4, 2005
This review is from: We Are Not Alone (Audio CD)
The fact that I even have to write this is eternally frustrating:

Breaking Benjamin, admittedly, IS enjoyable on a certain level. This level is called ROCK. Because this album is full of rock music, I (and apparently MOST people as well) am instantly attracted to it. These boys have a WHOLE lot of talent and it WOULD be easy for me to fall right in line with everyone else and love these guys, just as I've done with other bands like Staind and Linkin Park.

But NO!!! There is something HORRIBLY WRONG here!!!! While it is absolutely obvious to me that Breaking Benjamin (like so many other bands) is trying with all of their might to be diverse and different, they still fail worse than any band I have ever heard in my entire life . . . except for Smile Empty Soul, and my own garage band fronted by yours truly. But that's another review entirely.

I have read about 70,000 reviews on this site that SWEAR Breaking Benjamin is the most original thing they have ever heard. And yet, not a SINGLE REVIEW can explain WHAT IT IS that makes it SO DANGED ORIGINAL!!!!!!!! Could it possibly be those AWESOME hard rocking guitar riffs that all retain virtually the EXACT SAME recycled, churning tempo, structure, sound, tone, feeling, and general CRAPPINESS????? Might it be the *AMAZINGLY* deep and emotional lyrical topics that deal with ANGER and DEPRESSION and FEELING BAD with NO deeper meaning beneath it all to give us SOMETHING to THINK about????? WOW, that's *INCREDIBLE*!!!!!!!!!

These songs are FRIGGIN catchy, no doubt, but BB is no NIRVANA or PEARL JAM or FREAKING TOOL, though some of you shmucks somehow seem to think otherwise. That's like saying Britney Spears was John Lennon's greatest influence. Each song is essentially the same thing over and over and over again in all aspects, be it churning tempo, structure, sound, tone, feeling, and general CRAPPINESS, to the suffocating point where you begin to realize that Breaking Benjamin has actually written ONE song, and then played it 10 more times because it worked so well the first time. The problem is, it hardly anything great to begin with.

Vocally, this band is a Nickelback. Musically, this is a Linkin Park crossed with Staind, the main difference being that _those_ bands created music that actually made me FEEL SOMETHING. Breaking Benjamin fails this in every possible way. The bottom line is, I *TRULY* HAVE HEARD about twenty other bands record this EXACT SAME album, and most of the time it was fifty times better (Nonpoint, for example). Folks, just because you may really really like something, DOES NOT in ANY WAY make it original!!!! I WILL NEVER EVER understand why people will listen to this and say `greatest album ever!', and then go and completely ignore a *MUCH* better band like Fuel. You guys are TOTALLY missing out on a *MUCH* more fulfilling musical experience.

At least Breaking Benjamin has the perfect title for this perfect pile of poop: "We Are Not Alone". No, they certainly ARE NOT ALONE. They honestly sound like everything else pumping out of my stereo. BUT, I WILL award the band 2 stars for making an old idea sound cool on the opening track `So Cold'. And oh, as much as I hated this album, it WAS better than "Saturate".
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Sep 28, 2011 9:17 AM PDT

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30 of 35 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars More than 'Sober', my friends . . ., January 3, 2005
This review is from: Undertow (Audio CD)
Not that this album is in dire need of additional scrutinization or anything, but I've now decided to add my two `sense' here into this huge Amazonian mix. So here we go..........

The major thing I need to say about Tool is that you CANNOT take their music at face value, not for a single danged second because once you fall for the brilliant facade, you've basically fallen into the chasm you think you're avoiding by listening to Tool in the first place (more on this later). There are multiple layers of meaning, multiple layers to those meanings, and even layers to how these meanings interact with other meanings. If you look at Tool from only one perspective, then you will completely miss the point of what Tool (or at least Maynard) is trying to show us.

Alright, so why do you listen to Tool? With this album and the "Opiate" EP that preceded it, it had a whole lot to do with a defiant theme of `questioning authority'. I mean sure, the music on "Undertow" is utterly sweet in every musical aspect, laying the foundation for modern nu-metal. But it was the messages of anger and depression and the manipulation of religion that so seemed to torment Maynard that really got attention. This is what got the freethinkers and atheists into Tool, because they, like Tool, `questioned authority'.

Questioning authority is good. Really, it isn't the greatest idea to just submit to anyone and everyone that seems to hold authoritive influence or power of some sort. However, it's one thing to truly search for truth and truly find it, and something else entirely to ignore the truth simply because you don't like it. This album is the story of someone who searches for truth, but somehow prefers desperation. This album is a HUGE slap in the face to those who hear Tool and `question authority', and yet fail miserably in that very regard by not even thinking to question the authority that TELLS them to in the first place! This album, "Undertow", is the beginning of the longest and most complex rock opera ever recorded (more, even, than "American Idiot":-). If you're still reading, pay attention.

Questioning authority truly IS the friggin point, people. Once you question Tool's true motives behind their music, then you will begin to understand what Tool's is actually saying. "Undertow" is the story of someone who questions authority and arrives to the WRONG conclusion, which is that there IS no conclusion. Humanity just blows. He just wants to sleep through this (`why can't we not be sober?'). Depression depression depression. It is patently clear to this character that religion cannot be the answer to anything he's looking for. He questioned that authority, and decided that it doesn't make sense to follow God. But throughout the album there are snippets of this guy looking back, and thinking "maybe I left the answer back there" with religion. "Digustipated", the album's closer, seems to be this guy reminding himself that he doesn't believe in God, that religion is a tool used for greed and manipulation. He's trying to run away from his doubts.

If I had the patience, I would go track by track and explain the obvious meanings of the track, the not-so-obvious meanings, and how each falls into the story perfectly. Unfortunately this can't be done right now, but try looking at it like this: "Undertow" runs seamlessly into the following album "Aenima", which follows the same thematic thread but has the character realize that he has to look beyond himself, beyond his eyes for the answers. At the closing, `Third Eye' is a determination to look for spiritual guidance, and "Lateralus" is the eye wide open and the truth understood. Ever notice all those eyes in the "Lateralus" artwork? Anyway, that was an incredibly inadequate summary, but I'll need to continue with those on their own reviews.

In people's great respect for Tool and their belief in `questioning authority', people are losing Tool's greater meaning by not questioning what Tool is trying to say. If you look at it from multiple viewpoints, it makes more sense than any other musical work I have ever heard. I know a lot of folks will disagree simply because they can't believe Tool could get any more complex then they already thought, but this is what it is. I'll write my other Tool reviews A.S.A.P. and tie it all together, but until then, yours truly can't wait `til Tool album 2005!!!!!
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Nov 11, 2014 3:31 PM PST

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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars All sounds made with guitar, drums, bass and vocals, January 2, 2005
This review is from: Audioslave (Audio CD)
People, THIS IS THE REAL DEAL. My previous review for this album was very very stupid and failed completely in conveying the emotional link I have with this gorgeous album. This is my penitence.

There is something beautifully ragged about rock'n'roll. Some more experimental outfits such as A Perfect Circle, Linkin Park, Tool, or Silverchair and other such things can be very enjoyable and amazing and stuff, but nothing can strike the same chord with me like good ole AMERICAN rock'n'roll bands, such as the Foo Fighters, Pearl Jam, Aerosmith, Fuel, Jet(not really American, but not really Canadian either), and AUDIOSLAVE. Audioslave just kinda shrieks of genuine, solid, unrepentant rock'n'roll, which is more than can be said for the Nickelbacks(poor Canadians) and Bush's(the band, not the president you idiots) of the world. There is beauty indefinable within the digital confines of this cd, something that no true rock fan will achieve a good night's sleep without.

Which isn't to say that Audioslave doesn't experiment with their songs. Guitarist Tom Morello has taken his guitar to infinity and beyond many a day back when the band was known as Rage Against the Machine. Tommy is almost slaved to his love for strange, quirky little noise-making tricks that now submerge in Audioslave, but to an albeit lesser degree. And his trademark chugging, bouncing riffs are still everywhere to be seen, but when all of this is added to the sacred vocals of Chris Cornell, a higher degree of rock'n'rollishness is achieved.

Chris has got to be just about the greatest vocalist of all time. Or, y'know, one of them. And after decades of screeching into microphones, this man can still go from mellow, musical crooning, straight into roaring, bloody-ape-monster-gut-crushing screams that would make even Chester Bennington whimper in fear. Two words, baby!: ROCK AND ROLL. That's three words, if you're paying attention. This is two: ROCK ROLL! But that doesn't make any sense, so we'll go with the former.

GAWL DANG, there are too many out of this world songs to know where to start. This is one of those albums where like, 7 of the songs are your favorites, but if I were to have a super-ultra-mega-unknown favorite track, it's name would be `Gasoline'. Rousing guitar melodies and huge, screaming vocal choruses are king of everything on this album, but it all reaches its incredibly high peak on `Gasoline'. It's that good of a track.

Other songs that most people of heard by now include `Cochise', a song that I coulda sworn was AC/DC the first time I heard it; `Show Me How To Live', which I have heard about 50 billion times and still love it to death, FANTASTIC RIFF; `What You Are', rocking, terrorizing song that is as beautiful as it is loud, and it IS loud; `Like A Stone' & `I Am The Highway' are both some of the best ballads I've heard in the past 5 years or so, A Perfect Circle aside.

Many other songs on the album will cater to those who appreciate these radio wonders. The songs rock rock rock all night long and in all the best possible ways. `Light My Way', `Shadow of the Sun', and `Exploder' all follow a hard, loud, head-banging recipe that is just delectable. `Getaway Car' and `the Last Remaining Light' are two more soft numbers, the latter being the better of the two, though `Getaway Car' is much more enjoyable than most give it credit for. `Set It Off' has the best chorus from any band I've heard in the past few years, and `Hypnotize' is worthy of mention, simply because all I can see when I listen to it is disco lights, a disco ball, and hundreds of dancing fools swaying to the groovy beat.

So I mean, this Audiolave stuff is a must have for those who need more ROCK, with a bit of experimentation for catharsis' sake. For those who THINK they have rock, you put down your silly little Nickelback album and go listen to Audioslave about fifty times. It truly is a GARDEN of SOUND(wink-wink).

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1 of 4 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Power chords for beginners..., December 21, 2004
This review is from: Weathered (Audio CD)
It seems that only two opinions of CREED have ever existed, and neither of them are true. One of them is "CREED is the best band EVER!!!" which isn't true because there are far better musicians making far better music out there, like Pearl Jam. The other opinion, "CREED is the worst thing EVER CREATED!!!", is untrue because there is still Breaking Benjamin to consider. If someone were to say something like, "Creed had one really great record, and `Weathered' is it!!!", that would probably be the worst untruth of them all. But if someone answered "Actually, `Weathered' wasn't that great of an album", they would be 100% right.

Following the ridiculous success of their sophomore effort, Creed continues on the same power-chorded path as "Human Clay". Power chord here, power chord there . . . OH! Tremonti, I think we need a few more of those handy little POWER CHORDS riiight here, and sprinkle a few over there . . . yes, that's right . . . yeeeesss, PERFECT!!! NO Stapp NO, it's not perfect, it's boring, generic, repetitive and smells un-like teen spirit.

BOOM!! `Bullets' is loud, earth-shattering shiznit, and I like it. Based on my dislike for powa-powa-powa-chords, I really SHOULDN'T like it. But I do. `Freedom Fighters' feels kinda self-righteous, "listen-to-me-I-am-a-wise-guy-named-Scott-Stapp" type song, which means I DON'T like it. That's one for one. "HY-UH-WHYI-UH-HO!!" Okay, `Who's Got My Back?' gets serious artistic/creative points for using an Indian. *high fives* Again, I like this song when I shouldn't. In fact, I think it's just about the best Creed song I have ever experienced. Idon know, I've always been a sucka for longer, artistic songs, so there you go. 2 outta 3.

Heh-heh. `Signs' is POWA-CHORD-CENTRAL, and isn't nearly as artsy as the previous song. You fail. `One Last Breath' is actually the best Creed single I've heard since `Torn' on "My Own Prison", and I enjoy it muchly. Very interesting riff by Tremonti. But then comes `My Sacrifice'. A heartfelt tune, but unfortunately this is POWA-CHORD-CENTRAL's cousin, SUPA-CENTRAL. That's 3 for 3.

`You Stand Here With Me' was something I used to hate... and I still hate it, but it's a sort of ADMIRING hatred. Cuz the music is so dang good, it reminds me of the stuff I loooved on Creed's debut. But I somehow just don't LIKE it. Positive cancels out the negative, leaving nothing. So we skip to the next song: `Weathered'. Bluesy. Saloon-like atmosphere. I can see a ruffian's heels clinkin' as he saunters inside for a dusty drink. I like. Shouldn't, but do. Curses, I'm losing...

But wait! The next two songs are boring, stupid, and really just kinda STUPID! `Hide' and `Don't Stop Dancing' are both obviously heartfelt, but they fail to enamor me in any way worth mentioning. That's minus a BIG FAT 2!! HA!!! And suddenly . . . what am I hearing? It's beautiful. It's touching. It's `Lullaby', and it certainly is simple, with a strange but soothing acoustic geetar pattering away in the background. Stapp truly sounds sincere now, and I'm wishing he could do the same on the rest of the record. It's not the most engaging thing I've ever heard, but it is quite good.

Now we round out the good songs to 5 and the bad songs to 5, which leaves one song with nowhere to call home. We'll just toss it in with the bad to make my amazing point:

"`Weathered' ain't all it's crapped up to be!! Make sure you'd rather get this instead of a masterpiece like "Lateralus" by Tool or maybe "Vs." by Pearl Jam!!! I hope this was informative, but it's too late to make a difference, since just about everyone on the planet buys these Creed things even when they SMELL UN-LIKE TEEN SPIRIT!!! Oh well."
Comment Comment (1) | Permalink | Most recent comment: Sep 28, 2011 9:19 AM PDT

Greatest Hits
Greatest Hits
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7 of 15 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Battle of the Greatest Hits: Creed vs. Pearl Jam, December 21, 2004
This review is from: Greatest Hits (Audio CD)
Welcome, ladies and gents, prepubescent young boys and girls alike, to the musical contest of the CENTURY!!! Tonight's fight will feature two of the most heinously popular rock groups of the 1990s, clashing mightily in a contest to expose which `Greatest Hits' package will rise to superiority over the failing party.

In the corner to my left, let me introduce Creed's greatest hits, splendidly titled "Creed: Greatest Hits"! This collection weighs in at a near-pathetic 13 tracks, which include some of the biggest hits from one of the biggest bands in recent memory (of Creed's three recorded albums, 23 million total copies have been sold worldwide). A bonus DVD helps to give this album a bit more bite to its bark, toting three live performances and Creed's entire collection of videos. Slightly impressive, but "Creed: Greatest Hits" somehow seems a bit of a lightweight competitor, never mind how many albums they've sold.

In the opposing corner, let me introduce Pearl Jam's "Rearviewmirror"!!! Weighing in with 33 of the band's most successful tracks during last 14 years, this double-disc set is divided onto an `Upside' and a `Downside' disc; `Upside' serving as a collection of harder rock songs, and `Downside' stepping up with a plethora of PJ ballads. With such an obese amount of incredibly emotive, powerful rock anthems on "Rearviewmirror", it's already beginning to look bad for post-grunge Creed enthusiasts.

The bell sounds and the match begins. Creed starts off with its album's strongest track, `Torn', which rocks slowly and moodily, building to a powerful crescendo . . . until Pearl Jam leaps into action, whipping out a scathing triple-combo from the `Upside' disc: `Once', `Even Flow', and `Alive'. Each of these legendary songs systematically beat, pound, poke and slam `Torn' into the dust, utterly stripping it of any redeeming qualities by simply taking the same rage, same mood and same rowdiness that `Torn' utilizes, and then transcends it until it's an exhilarating, majestic, and effectively elegant rage, mood and rowdiness. The anger in `Once' is unequaled and nearly tangible; the frustration in `Even Flow' bleeds from each note and lyric; the majesty of `Alive' is impossible in every emotional and musical aspect, and `Torn' is reduced to nothing, stumbling to it's small corner in disbelief and shame.

For each song Creed presents in it's defense, Pearl Jam has three more to destroy it. The heavy crunching of Creed's `Bullets' explodes and singes the air, but PJ's `Animal', `Do The Evolution' and `State of Love and Trust' wrestles it to the ground and beats it mercilessly, utilizing incredible passion to great effect. The hypnotically affecting `Jeremy' and pleading power of `Corduroy' peel Creed's `My Own Prison' apart like a rotten banana. For every `Arms Wide Open' from Creed, Pearl Jam unleashes an unrealistically beautiful `Black', or a patently euphoric `Man of the Hour', or a relentlessly sincere `Elderly Woman...', or the gorgeous magnificence of `Nothingman', (all courtesy of the `Downside' disc) to smack it around like a sterile, soggy tennis ball.

Which isn't to say Creed doesn't put up a fairly strong fight. The first four tracks on Creed's `hits' album are among the best songs the band ever produced. The music videos are a nice touch too, but all of them together still can't scratch the immortal surface of Pearl Jam's own `Jeremy' video. The three live songs are pretty cool, but ultimately fail to bring anything new to the original tracks.

In short, it's obvious that this fight was entirely unfair. Each and every song (almost) that Pearl Jam presents to the listener on "Rearviewmirror" is improvement on perfection. Creed has garnered a ridiculous amount of success in its short history, and while their music is sometimes powerful and engaging, it can't stand against Pearl Jam. If you asked Santa for any `Greatest Hits' package last year, it should've been "Rearviewmirror".

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