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Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort
Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort
DVD ~ Anthony Ilott
Price: $9.99

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars THE PRICE OF PURITY, October 19, 2014
This review is from: Wrong Turn 6: Last Resort (DVD)
Danny (Anthony Ilott) unexpectedly inherits the Hobbs Springs Hotel and is eager to meet family he has never know. He takes along with him a group of victims, er ah friends. Seems Danny has been brought back to take over the hotel for the fine young cannibals and to preserve the purity of the blood line to the dismay of his girl friend (Aqueela Zoll).

What's to say? I liked #4 the best especially the opening classical music scene which they have failed to top. This is 80's style slasher, naked girls, kill them in different ways, and eat the body parts. "Fun is the kind of therapy we all need."

The town has a board full of missing people and a puppy. This film sets up for what could be a great sequel if they got some writers.

F-bomb, sex, nudity (Aqueela Zoll, Sadie Katz, Roxanne Pallett, Talitha Luke-Eardley)

The Poker House
The Poker House
Price: $9.99

4.0 out of 5 stars IT'S ALWAYS BAD, October 19, 2014
Based on a true story that takes place in Iowa. Agnes (Jennifer Lawrence) is a 14 year old girl advanced for her age. She plays basketball, does calculus, holds down a local job, keeps the household together and gives dry boring narration about her life and dogs biting. Her mother (Selma Blair) owns the Poker House" which is known for poker, gambling, drinking, prostitution, and apparently drugs, although the nightly antics are basically limited to one night, so the audience never got the real feeling of despair.

Bee (Sophi Bairley) is 12 years old and delivers papers. She stays at the neighbors whenever possible. Cammie (Chloë Grace Moretz) is the youngest and in spite of all the praise for J-Law, I couldn't wait for her character to come on screen as she rattled off at the mouth.

The story is slow. It spends time to fully develop the sisters' characters. Agnes, is coming of age and has a touch of Jungle Fever, which becomes both her demise and finally salvation. It is an interesting tale, but it felt incomplete. Personally I thought Lawrence's acting in "Winterbone" smoked this one.

Parental Guide: F-bomb, rape, nudity (Selma Blair) 3 1/2 stars

The film leads you to believe this was the bio for Lori Petty but her IMDB bio reads: "She spent her childhood traveling the US with her father, a Pentecostal minister. Her keen talents first lent themselves toward being a graphic artist in Omaha, Nebraska, but an impulsive desire to act quickly took precedence and soon she was off to New York"

"She was the first female editor of the North High School newspaper and graduated in 1982.
Attended North High School, Sioux City, Iowa, where she was involved in Yearbook and speech/debate."

The film suggests she left for NYC at 14. Seems to be some missing story.

See No Evil 2 [Blu-ray]
See No Evil 2 [Blu-ray]
DVD ~ Glenn Jacobs
Price: $15.99

2.0 out of 5 stars DO WE REALLY WANT TO SAVE THIS GUY?,, October 19, 2014
This review is from: See No Evil 2 [Blu-ray] (Blu-ray)
I didn't think the first one was that good to warrant a sequel. Jacob (Glenn Jacobs) because "Jason" might bring a lawsuit is our killer who died at the end of the first film, but didn't. Like Jason, he comes back to life, wears a mask, is huge and kills kids who are sinners.

The setting is the city morgue as Seth (Kaj-Erik Eriksen) and Amy (Danielle Harris) work the graveyard shift on her birthday. Bodies are brought to the morgue from the end of the first feature, including the killer. Amy is given a surprise birthday party, because killing just a few people and a guy in a wheel chair has been done before and better. Oh where are the chainsaws when you need one.

This is another me-too slasher attempting to remake another Friday the 13th series.

Parental Guide: No f-bombs or nudity. Sex scene and all that bloody stuff.

Price: $14.99

2.0 out of 5 stars SURPRISE!, October 19, 2014
This review is from: Mockingbird (Amazon Instant Video)
This is another bad hand held camera film. It uses dark scenes with people talking for those who prefer to watch radio. Oh the realism!

The film opens with us watching a child getting shot in the head. It jumps to three people getting a camera delivered to their door: a family (Todd Stashwick/Lee Garlington), a single girl (Audrey Marie Anderson), and Leonard (Barak Hardley). They all enjoy their new prize; a camera that doesn't shut off and seems to have an infinite powered battery. They get subsequent instructions that delve into their personalities and fears. The family fear for their kids, the woman is a lone and fears she will not be liked, and Leonard looks for a life outside of his mother and hand.

Leonard gets a clown suit, i.e. the guy on the cover. The idea was interesting enough, even with the fact there was no closure. The problem I had was the poor execution. Everything was done through the jerky dark movements of the camera. The script was for the most part boring, in part due to said cameras. When the screen goes dark, it becomes a film I could make myself and certainly compose better dialogue.

If you love the hand held cameras, and don't care about closure, this is your film. I liked the ending. I didn't like the way it got there.

Parental Guide; F-bomb. No sex or nudity.

Serena & The Ratts
Serena & The Ratts
Price: $12.99

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars IT'S NOT EASY TO FIRE SOMEONE IN THIS BUSINESS, October 19, 2014
I loved the brilliant opening scene which in a matter of seconds establishes Serena's character and the quickly merging subplot. Serena wakes up disheveled, having her morning sugary cereal, cigarette, and PBR. On the TV, the news reports the creation of wormholes here on earth and the possibility of time travel. Bored with the greatest scientific discovery of all time, she flips the channel to watch old cartoons. Cue credits as she nonchalantly blocks a knife tossed at her by her boyfriend.

We quickly discover that the "black coats" or scientists create a plan to go back in time to kill Hitler when he was 10 years old, to make the world a better place. Serena is a hit-girl. Her boss wants her and the "RATTs" (Renegades Against Time Travel) to stop them, because someone other than Hitler would have took his spot and maybe done a better job against the west.

The film at this point moves on disjointedly by design as past events merge with the present in the form of flashbacks so that the original plot seems lost. It had some slow scenes and confusing scenes and it isn't until the end when the Boss (Jonathan Thomson) explains the plot, that we can appreciate the film. And I didn't see it coming as I missed the subtle clues.

Evalena Marie did a good job in the title role. Unfortunately much of the supporting cast were stiff by comparison.

Clearly this film is not for everyone. Those who enjoyed "Primer" and the absurdity of time might find this film interesting...or not.

Parental Guide: F-bomb. No sex or nudity.

Cross Bearer - The Hammer Of God (2012) Limited Edition Mediabook Blu-ray + DVD
Cross Bearer - The Hammer Of God (2012) Limited Edition Mediabook Blu-ray + DVD
DVD ~ Isaac Williams

3.0 out of 5 stars IF I HAD A HAMMER, October 19, 2014
The film introduces us to a righteous vigilante intent on killing drug dealers, strippers, prostitutes, and pimps. The film then focuses on the life of a lesbian stripper (Natalie Jean) with a Philadelphia slang background. We then go back to he bloody killer (Isaac Williams) who uses a hammer to bash heads to produce some of the reddest blood around.

The plot pretty well sucked, but I have to give it 3 stars for all the sex and nudity...thank you Dawn Vaughn, Kacie Marie, Wyn Nugyen, Kalsey Lehman, Raichyl Sinversa, Suzi Pang, Brittany Reardon, Janet Searfoss and many more.

Bro What Happened
Bro What Happened
DVD ~ Jamie Kennedy
Price: $9.99
4 used & new from $8.99

3.0 out of 5 stars YOU GOTTA GET THAT CHECKED OUT, October 19, 2014
This review is from: Bro What Happened (DVD)
Based on the success of "The Hangover" series we are presented with another teen sex comedy based on not being able to remember what happened the night before.

Unlike the other knock off films, this one has some original and better constructed humor, i.e. it is better than most of the other me-too Hangover films. Jamie Kennedy plays MF Bob (you do the math) a laid back character in a room full of party animals. As they try to piece things out, everyone has their own memory as to what happened, where of course they see themselves in a better light than what everyone else sees them.

If you are into crude humor, this one has it and is perhaps done a bit better.

F-bomb, sex, and nudity. Plenty of young topless women.

DVD ~ Doug Chapman
Price: $9.96
43 used & new from $1.79

2.0 out of 5 stars THIS SHOULD BE FUN, October 18, 2014
This review is from: Toxin (DVD)
This is another low budget Canadian film shot mostly in the woods. It is twice as good as "Battle Earth" but then again, twice nothing is still nothing.

The film opens on remote Archer island in the Pacific NW. A small group of US forces are testing out a chemical weapon which causes a person to go into a berserker mode and see the world through a red filter. Some unspecified years later. John Paxton (Douglas Chapman) boards a charter flight that fate demands crashes on said island with expected results.

There is quite the cast of characters on board which made the film enjoyable to a certain degree. Also the metal music added to the production. Clearly this is one of the better low budget productions. The film has character, a zombie-ish plot, minor humor, decent sound track and plot holes , yet at the same time its short 72 minutes seemed like an eternity. The main problem was the lifeless John Paxton character who was secretive about something we already knew. At the same time, the attacking creatures looked like.. well regular humans.

Low end rental.

Parental Guide: F-bomb. No sex or nudity.

The Canal
The Canal
Price: $6.99

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars WHO WANTS TO SEE GHOSTS?, October 18, 2014
This review is from: The Canal (Amazon Instant Video)
David (Rupert Evans) works at the archives. He has recently moved into a new home with his family. Six second David is not keeping his wife happy. At work, he comes across some old 1902 footage showing that a murder took place in his house, a man killed his cheating wife. He becomes obsessed with killings and the nearby canal, seeing ghosts in every film of the house.

The film starts out a bit slow, and I suspected it was going to be a dud. However, it builds up and the ending made the slower parts worth while to stick it through. Good ghost story.

Parental Guide: F-bomb, sex, nudity...a little of each.

DVD ~ Danny Trejo
Price: $22.93
10 used & new from $17.54

2.0 out of 5 stars THROW AWAY, October 18, 2014
This review is from: Throwdown (DVD)
Jaxon Stone (Timothy Woodward Jr.) defends bad guys even when he knows they are guilty. When Juan Torres (Jerry G. Angel) is accused of rape and murder, he works to free him even though Juan confesses to the crime. Vincent Delacruz (Vinnie Jones) whose son was murdered wants Stone to free Juan so he can kill him. Meanwhile in a subplot young girls are being kidnapped and forced into prostitution so Danny Trejo can do his cameo and get his face on the DVD cover as if he was a major player.

The courtroom drama was poor. Stone opened the film with the worse closing argument I have ever heard. I wouldn't let this guy defend me for a parking ticket. Luke Goss works with Stone as he knows how to Google. The story was fairly linear and had a feel and soundtrack like a made for TV production. Some of the film was shot with a shaky camera for effect, but after they did that for the tied up girls, why did they continue it into the bar scene? And what was that on the lens while Stone was giving a speech in his living room?

California has reciprocal discovery laws, which the film ignores.

Danny Trejo is back to doing small roles that need an ugly Mexican.

Parental Guide: F-bombs. No sex or nudity. Killing. Minor torture. Abduction. My advice is don't pay to see it. Soft 2 stars

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