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Coming Together, Coming Apart: A Memoir of Heartbreak and Promise in Israel (Hardcover)

by Daniel Gordis (Author) "What did you learn in school today?..." (more)
Key Phrases: West Bank, Ariel Sharon, Tel Aviv (more...)

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Home to Stay: One American Family's Chronicle of Miracles and Struggles in Contemporary Israel by Daniel Gordis
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Saving Israel: How the Jewish People Can Win a War That May Never End by Daniel Gordis
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Editorial Reviews

Review
"Whether describing a walk through Jerusalem in snow, a hike in the desert or a farewell family drive to the Gaza settlements, Gordis manages to capture the essential details that tell us the larger meaning of our Israeli lives. There is much irony in this book, and also anger, especially against those who unfairly judge Israel in its most desperate and noble times. Most of all, though, this book is the chronicle of a love story - of an immigrant family in Jerusalem falling in love with Israel and, through that love, discovering the strength to cope with life on the front lines of a Jihadist war. As a fellow Jerusalemite, I feel a profound debt to Gordis for explaining what it means to raise a family in the middle of a terror zone, and the courage that average Israelis instinctively display in maintaining the pretense of normal life. Those of us who share his passion are fortunate to be so well represented by this book."
—Yossi Klein Halevi, Foreign Correspondent, The New Republic

"Interesting conversation is Israel's most ingratiating commodity, and this is an especially interesting one. To read Coming Together, Coming Apartis to be engaged in an ongoing dialogue with one of Israel's most thoughtful observers - an American who made Israel his home, despite its imperfections and dangers. Gordis's conversational narrative is irresistible."
—Alan Dershowitz, author of The Case for Israel

Product Description
Praise for Coming Together, Coming Apart

"Interesting conversation is Israel's most ingratiating commodity, and this is an especially interesting one. To read Coming Together, Coming Apart is to be engaged in an ongoing dialogue with one of Israel's most thoughtful observers--an American who made Israel his home, despite its imperfections and dangers. Gordis's conversational narrative is irresistible."
--Alan dershowitz, author of The Case for Israel

"Whether describing a walk through Jerusalem in snow, a hike in the desert, or a farewell family drive to the Gaza settlements, Gordis manages to capture the essential details that tell us the larger meaning of our Israeli lives. There is much irony in this book, and also anger, especially against those who unfairly judge Israel in its most desperate and noble times. Most of all, though, this book is the chronicle of a love story--of an immigrant family in Jerusalem falling in love with Israel and, through that love, discovering the strength to cope with life on the front lines of a jihadist war. As a fellow Jerusalemite, I feel a profound debt to Gordis for explaining what it means to raise a family in the middle of a terror zone, and the courage that average Israelis instinctively display in maintaining the pretense of normal life. Those of us who share his passion are fortunate to be so well represented by this book."
--Yossi Klein Halevi, Foreign Correspondent, The New Republic

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Product Details

Hardcover: 272 pages
Publisher: Wiley (June 26, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0471789615
ISBN-13: 978-0471789611
Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.2 x 1.1 inches
Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (10 customer reviews)

Amazon.com Sales Rank: #235,336 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)
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#59 in Books > Travel > Middle East > Israel

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Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!

Inside This Book (learn more)

First Sentence:
What did you learn in school today? Read the first page

Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
West Bank, Ariel Sharon, Tel Aviv, Middle East, Los Angeles, Emek Refa'im, Land of Israel, United States, Abu Dis, Ben Gurion, Camp David, Supreme Court, Ilan Ramon, Israeli Arabs, New York, Abu Mazen, Green Line, Gush Eztion, Omar Souad, Yom Ha-Atzma'ut, Yom Kippur, Adi Avitan, Benny Avraham, Gaza Strip, Independence Day

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Citations (learn more)

This book cites 8 books:

Isaiah Berlin: A Life by Michael Ignatieff on page 89
The Yom Kippur War by Insight Team of the London Sunday Times in Back Matter
Becoming a Jewish Parent: How to Explore Spirituality and Tradition with Your Children by Daniel Gordis in Front Matter
The Gift of the Magi and Other Short Stories by William Sydney Porter on page 236
If a Place Can Make You Cry: Dispatches from an Anxious State by Daniel Gordis in Front Matter

See all 8 books this book cites

Books on Related Topics (learn more)

Scars of War, Wounds of Peace by Shlomo Ben-Ami

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Palestine and the Palestinians by Samih K. Farsoun

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The West Bank Wall by Ray Dolphin

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What Do Customers Ultimately Buy After Viewing This Item?

	61% buy the item featured on this page: Coming Together, Coming Apart: A Memoir of Heartbreak and Promise in Israel 5.0 out of 5 stars (10) $18.94
	29% buy Saving Israel: How the Jewish People Can Win a War That May Never End 4.7 out of 5 stars (13) $17.13
	4% buy God Was Not in the Fire 4.8 out of 5 stars (5) $17.95
	3% buy Home to Stay: One American Family's Chronicle of Miracles and Struggles in Contemporary Israel 4.8 out of 5 stars (8) $11.86

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Customer Reviews

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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully Written and Provocative, September 16, 2006

By	Zebulun - See all my reviews

Coming Together is a vast improvement over Home to Stay. The writing is absolutely beautiful, the ideas provocative. The heart of the book is Gordis's account of his family's adjustment to life in Israel, beginning at the tail end of the Second Intifada, when the Gordis family is kept awake in its Jerusalem home by gunfire at night, and terrified by suicide murders that take place in their favorite haunts, and ending with mild optimism when the evil Arafat finally passes.

In the pages in between, Gordis, a liberal but not a "leftist," manages to efficiently and eloquently take down those Jews who ignore Israel's obligations to preserve Jewish moral values in its conflict with the Palestinians, as well as those Jews who reflexively oppose the very existence of Israel, because they prefer perpetual Jewish victimhood and the accompanying moral high ground to the inevitable moral compromises and errors that come with power and statehood. He also conveyed to me, as a "serious Jew" who has never had any significant desire to live in Israel, why he would uproot his family from a comfortable upper middle class life in L.A. and expose them to danger to fulfill his Zionist dream. As he expresses it far more eloquently than I can, I won't try to summarize it here. [UPDATE: I should point out that while Gordis emphasizes the very palpable dangers faced by Jerusalemites durng the Second Intifada, raising one's teenagers in L.A. carries some very real, though perhaps less palpable dangers [much higher crime rates, drug use rates, auto accident risk, and likely suicide rates], such that I doubt that Jerusalem in 2002 was more actually more dangerous for kids than West L.A. at the same time.]

One important caveat about this book: Israel is a country composed primarily of first, second, and third generation immmigrants, so there is really no such thing as a "typical Israeli". But to the extent there sort of is, Gordis surely isn't it. In one scene in the book, an Orthodox Jewish American says that Gordis isn't living in the real Israel because he lives in an "Anglo-Saxon" (what Israelis call native English speakers) community, hangs out mostly with British, American, and South African Jews, and works for an American-funded foundation employing yet more Anglos. Gordis bristles at the suggestion, and he's right that having moved to Israel and with a child in the army, he has as much claim to Israeliness as anyone. But in reading the book, one must keep in mind that you are getting the perspective of a relatively well-to-do American Jewish liberal Conservative rabbi/philosopher who recently moved to Israel, lives and works in in Anglo enclaves, and that the outlook and experiences of such an individual is pretty far removed from that of the "typical" Israeli. It's hard, for example, to imagine Gordis expressing serious concern about the "evil eye," a superstition that this spouse-of-an-Israeli finds to be pervasive in Israel. (I used to think that Israelis complain a lot, but I've since learned that refusing to acknowledge good fortune is a way to ward off the evil eye!)

Another interesting aspect of the book is that though it virtually drips with concern about Israel's future, Hizbollah only makes the obliquest of appearances, and Iran is never mentioned at all, not once. Instead, the book is preoccupied with the Palestinian question. A good example, I think, of how Israelis were so preoccupied with the Second Intifada that they paid too little attention to the looming fundamentalist Shiite threat until Hizbollah missiles starting raining down on them in June.

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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Must read book, August 3, 2006

By	Scott Howard (Los Angeles, CA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

I have read all of Daniel Gordis' books. Each one is extremely meaningful and thought provoking. The latest one, Coming Together, Coming Apart is a must read for anyone who cares about Israel,anyone who cares about humanity anyone who is a parent, or anyone who is a child. Very few books, that I will openly laugh, cry and make you think. It covers the period of two years, ending in October 2005 and is essentially the memoirs of Gordis, who emigrated to Israel from Los Angeles with his children. Especially in light of the current events, it helps one understand the day to day life that Israelies face, the challenges they face, and their love of life and their hope. Once you pick the book up, it is difficult to put it down. I cannot recommend it enough.

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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Tugs at the Heart and Mind, July 17, 2006

By	Matthew Conti (Albany, NY USA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

Daniel Gordis' writing is honest and moving, the key to any successful memoir. In the beginning of the memoir Gordis acknowledges the question that many parents ask him, "How could you do this to your kids? How could you take them from the safety of suburban Los Angles to Israel?" The answer to that question comes through in every word that he writes. It is an answer filled with meaning and purpose, history and peoplehood, faith and dedication. But I encourage the reader to discover the answer for his or herself.

Gordis, himself, defies many of the labels that plague Israel. He seems to be one of the few remaining people who can talk about Israel with nuance and a recognition of the truths that lie in the arguments of those on the left and those on the right. This is evidenced in his writings about the disengagement from Gaza in the summer of 2005. Mirroring the split opinions in his family (and his own internal conflicts) he tied both orange (signifying opposition to the disengagement) and blue and white (signifying support for the disengagement) ribbons to his car. This earned him many complaints from his family and an easier time parking at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem (you'll have to read to understand).

One of the things that makes this book a jewel is Gordis' constant acknowledgment and appreciation for where he is. Despite the trauma and difficulties of living through exploding busses and cafes while raising a family, he never loses an appreciation or forgets the ideals and history that led him and his family to make a life in Israel.

Easily a must read for those living outside of Israel, especially given the recent violence, it is perhaps an even more important read for those living inside of Israel. After reading this book one imagines that if there were more people in Israel like Gordis the country just might get through all its troubles.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Very realistic and honest
I truly loved this book. My husband and I have considered making Aliyah with our children on many occasions. Read more

Published 16 months ago by Miriam Bader

5.0 out of 5 stars Reflections of a family during the Terror War and Gaza Expulsion.
In this volume Daniel Gordis writes of his life in Israel from when he family moved from Los Angeles to Jerusalem. Read more

Published 17 months ago by Gary Selikow

5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for any zionist
It is easy to lose perspective regarding the importance of Israel in light of so many disheartening recent events in Israel. Yet Mr. Read more

Published on January 4, 2007 by Andre Jacobovitz

5.0 out of 5 stars the title is what's inside the book
I read this book on the airplane from the US to Israel during the summer of 2006. It helped to prepare me for the attitudes which I found while in Israel.

Published on November 3, 2006 by Jonathan Minsberg

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must-Read for Jews Inside & Outside of Israel!
"Coming Together, Coming Apart" is a must-read for Jews both inside and outside of Israel. An American family who makes the big decision to take their commitment to the ultimate... Read more

Published on August 13, 2006 by Lorelai Kude

5.0 out of 5 stars A Soulful Memoir of life in Israel
This is truly one from the heart! A soulful chronicle. Daniel Gordis beautifully captures what so many of us intuit from afar about life in Israel. Read more

Published on July 13, 2006 by David B. Brumer

5.0 out of 5 stars Extraordinary
This book is a must read for anyone wanting to get a better understanding of what it really means to love your country from a superb writer. Read more

Published on July 10, 2006 by M. Meyer

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