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Have Fun in Show Biz

A guide by J.D. Guinness (Kelowna, BC, Canada)

Products sampled from this guide:
Hi, I'm J.D. Guinness. Thanks for checking out this guide. I do appreciate it. While researching and writing about the Famous Fakes theatre company I learned a lot about how actors get their start. I would like to share that knowledge with you now, in the following FREE excerpt from my book, where you will get an inside look at the actor's craft. One way to test your ability as a potential actor is to go to a costume party. Take a look...


“Okay guys,” he hissed. “Everybody in character now. Energy, energy, energy.”

Bracing themselves, Steve rang the doorbell. The party’s host, an Elvis Presley, flung the door open and Charlie Chaplin, Stan Laurel, and Oliver Hardy - actually Steve, Paul, and Jean - burst through. They fooled and fumbled and stumbled at the door. The assembled guests hooted with delight. Just off the foyer there was a huge banner up on the dining room wall reading ARSENIC AND OLD LACE CAST PARTY. The three clowns at the door were making such a hilarious ruckus that a cluster of people in the living room put down what they were eating and/or drinking and came around to investigate. The beaming, delighted crowd included the Marx Brothers, Humphrey Bogart, John Wayne, Buddy Holly, John Lennon, the Three Stooges, and several Marilyn Monroes. They were utterly transfixed by the stumbling, improvisational fooling of Steve, Paul, and Jean. Elvis was particularly impressed, and collared Jean and Steve in the kitchen much later that evening.

“Man, you guys’re a riot,” he said, subtly competing with them now and trying to maintain a Tupelo, Mississippi accent. “You oughta go professional with this thing.”

Jean squirmed and smirked in bashful “Ollie” fashion. “Another fine mess you’re getting us into?” he asked. “Well, there’s nothing like a royal command! Mm, mm, MM!”

Elvis burst into a fit of giggles, “Man, ah’m serious!” he spluttered. “Y’all oughta get together and do it. Paul too.”

“Oh, I’m quite sure Paul wants to do it,” said Steve, with a Chaplinesque twitch of his false moustache.

Over in the living room, Paul, still in complete Stan Laurel costume, was talking to John Lennon on the living room couch. Only neither one of them was quite in character. Paul was expounding to John, a little too seriously, on his acting technique.

“I think the reason I work so well with the other guys is that we share the same intensities, y’know? I mean give us, what, six-and-a-half minutes? We’ll find the character. That’s what Jean and Steve and I all had in common when we did scenework in drama school. That intensity in ourselves, and that absolute focus, y’know, paying attention to each other. All we need is six-and-a-half minutes.”

John Lennon nodded, and then he removed his glasses and wig, revealing himself to actually being a stunning young blonde woman of Swedish stock. “Imagine,” she said, huskily.

Paul was scared stiff, after a fashion. He stared in amazement and finally managed to rasp, “Yes. Imagine, uh….?”

“Barbro,” she offered. Then, helpfully, “It’s Swedish, uh…?”

“Paul.” he answered, then, “Yes.” Then, trying to maintain his calm, “It certainly is…”

Sometime later, back in the kitchen, Steve was holding forth seriously to Jean and Elvis. “I don’t think there’s anything we’d rather do. I’m sure Paul would agree, wherever he is.”

Paul and Barbro were in Elvis’s bedroom, Paul sitting up naked in Elvis’s bed, his senses a mix of shock, lust, astonishment, anxiety, and confusion. The last thing he knew, he was putting his virginal frustrations deliberately aside to concentrate seriously on his career. The next thing he knew? Sex.


Hi, J.D. Guinness again. As you can see, a costume party is a great way to find out about yourself as an actor. There's a lot more I could quote you, but Amazon would prefer I refrained from using detailed sex scenes and adult language to explore the intricacies of the show business life. As Jean says in the book, "We're perfectly normal people in every way, apart from dressing up like dead people and having sex with each other." But you can find out about all that by reading my complete book, 'The Famous Fakes' by J.D. Guinness. For now, here is a list of similar items you may enjoy that have something to do with Having Fun in Show Biz. Thanks!

Love Life, Enjoy Yourselves.
J.D. GUINNESS

The Famous Fakes.
Johnny Carson.
Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life.
Life.
Bossypants.
Bob And Ray, Keener Than Most Persons.

Products mentioned include:
1.  The Famous Fakes  by J.D. Guinness
$2.07
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2.  Johnny Carson  by Henry Bushkin
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3.  Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life  by Steve Martin
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4.  Life  by Keith Richards
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5.  Bossypants  by Tina Fey
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6.  Bob And Ray, Keener Than Most Persons  by David Pollock
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J.D. Guinness (Kelowna, BC, Canada)
Qualifications: Writer/Producer
Last updated: 10/17/13
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