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The Austere Academy (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 5)
 
 
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The Austere Academy (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 5) (Hardcover)

by Lemony Snicket (Author), Brett Helquist (Illustrator), Michael Kupperman (Illustrator) "If you were going to give a gold medal to the least delightful person on Earth, you would have to give that medal to a..." (more)
Key Phrases: noisy shoes, luminous circle, advanced computer system, Coach Genghis, Count Olaf, Vice Principal Nero (more...)
4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (244 customer reviews)
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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review
As the three Baudelaire orphans warily approach their new home--Prufrock Preparatory School--they can't help but notice the enormous stone arch bearing the school's motto Memento Mori, or "Remember you will die." This is not a cheerful greeting, and certainly marks an inauspicious beginning to a very bleak story. Of course, this is what we have come to expect from Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events, the deliciously morbid set of books that began with The Bad Beginning and only got worse.

In The Austere Academy, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are at first optimistic--attending school is a welcome change for the book-loving trio, and the academy is allegedly safe from the dreaded Count Olaf, who is after their fortune. Hope dissipates quickly, however, when they meet Vice Principal Nero, a self-professed genius violinist who sneeringly imitates their every word. More dreadful still, he houses them in the tin Orphans Shack, crawling with toe-biting crabs and dripping with a mysterious tan fungus. A beam of light shines through the despair when the Baudelaires meet the Quagmires, two of three orphaned triplets who are no strangers to disaster and sympathize with their predicament. When Count Olaf appears on the scene disguised as Coach Genghis (covering his monobrow with a turban and his ankle tattoo with expensive running shoes), the Quagmires resolve to come to the aid of their new friends. Sadly, this proves to be a hideous mistake.

Snicket disarms us again with his playful juxtapositions--only he can compare bombs with strawberry shortcake (both are as dangerous to make as assumptions), muse on how babies adjust developmentally to the idea of curtains, or ponder why the Baudelaire orphans would not want to be stalks of celery despite their incessant bad luck as humans. We can't get enough of this splendid series of misadventures, and can only wager that swarms of young readers will be right next to us in line for the next installment. (Ages 9 and older) --Karin Snelson

From School Library Journal
Grade 4-7-In this fifth entry in the saga of the three Baudelaire children, the siblings are sent to a boarding school where they are tormented because they are orphans. There is the usual array of stupid/evil adults including the ridiculous Vice Principal Nero, who mimics everything that Klaus and Violet say and employs baby Sunny as his secretary because she is too young to attend class. Brown-nosing brats like Carmelita Spats make the children's lives even more miserable. The ending is a cliff-hanger as the evil Count Olaf, disguised as Coach Genghis, the new gym teacher, drives off with the orphans' only friends. In these days of Harry Potter, this book is a pesky nuisance, with little plot to drive it, situations that fall short of being interesting or off-the-wall, and cardboard characters. The author strains to be eccentric and his constant interruptions in the narrative to define a word or phrase are jarring at best.
Ann Cook, Winter Park Public Library, FL
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details
Front Cover | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
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First Sentence:
If you were going to give a gold medal to the least delightful person on Earth, you would have to give that medal to a person named Carmelita Spats, and if you didn't give it to her, Carmelita Spats was the sort of person who would snatch it from your hands anyway. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
noisy shoes, luminous circle, advanced computer system, brown lawn, running laps, hee hee hee, comprehensive exams
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Coach Genghis, Count Olaf, Vice Principal Nero, Orphans Shack, Carmelita Spats, Prufrock Prep, Room Two, Special Messenger, Memento Mori, Special Orphan Running Exercises
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Customer Reviews

244 Reviews
5 star:
 (163)
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 (65)
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 (9)
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Average Customer Review
4.6 out of 5 stars (244 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Best So Far In Series, July 11, 2001
By Brett Benner (Los Angeles, CA USA) - See all my reviews
(TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)      
I have to admit as much as I've enjoyed these books, by the fourth I was getting a little bored. The structure would stay the same, the victims names would just change. I was so glad then to find the fifth book expanding and bringing in new characters who look like they could be around in future books. Mr Poe packs Violet, Klaus , and Sunny off to a horrible boarding school that has ridiculous rules. Of course you wait to see when the evil Count Olaf will rear his head, but the distraction in the book comes from the addition of two children the same age as Violet and Klaus who become their friends. It gives the series new places to go and breaks the normal story outlines. It's also the longest so far but for me it read the fastest. If you've liked the other books in the series you can be sure you'll like this one as well.
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Bleak, depressing, and wonderful..., August 5, 2000
By Mara (Champaign, IL USA) - See all my reviews
The Austere Academy, fifth in A Series of Unfortunate Events, will not disappoint fans of the books. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are stuck at a nightmarish boarding school, where they are made to live in a shack that includes territorial crabs, a strange tan fungus, and truly hideous wallpaper. Added to this are incredibly dull classes and a headmaster who cannot play the violin but insists on doing so anyway...for six hours a night at an all-school concert. If only these were the worst of the Baudelaires' problems, they could finally consider themselves lucky. But, alas, the fiendish Count Olaf has tracked them down yet again. Once again the Baudelaires must try to discover his evil plan in time to save themselves and their fortune. Along the way there are more clues about Lemony Snicket's mysterious lady love, the charming and beautiful but unfortunately deceased Beatrice...A great read, but be warned that the ending is a cliffhanger that will leave you feeling very impatient to get your hands on the next volume!
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14 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Oh oh oh! I am frightened of Count Olaf!, August 17, 2000
By Bully Corcoran (Brooklyn, NY, USA) - See all my reviews
I have read all the Series of Unfortunate Events books. They are all very good! But I am scared of Count Olaf. He always creeps up and tries to kidnap the Baudelaire orphans, and no one believes them when they say he is in disguise, so they have to stop him themselves. I am glad the Baudelaire orphans are so resourceful and brave, because I would be *very* frightened of Count Olaf. Oh oh oh! Isn't that him there in those fake mutton-chop whiskers and the cowboy hat? Look OUT, Baudelaire orphans! Look out! Oh, I must close the book now and go lie down for a bit to recover from the fright he always gives me.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars Bad violin playing and poor education
At least in this book the Baudelaire meet with both the Quagmire triplets who are in the same boat as they are in. Read more
Published 1 month ago by James D. Crabtree

4.0 out of 5 stars The Orphans Get Schooled
Please, Lemony Snicket, I ask imploringly, a word here which means "so as to have more free time," write a book that doesn't suck me completely into the story, one that doesn't... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Jacob P. Silvia

5.0 out of 5 stars the austere academy
Lemony Snicket is the authot of the austere acadamy. He has written alot of books. The books are The Series Of Unfortunate Events. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Mrs. Duarte's Class

4.0 out of 5 stars The Best One
Lemony Snicket is the author of the Austere Academy. He has written alot of books.The books are the Series of Unfortunate Events. Read more
Published 7 months ago

4.0 out of 5 stars The Baudelaires survive a really bad school
In which the children survive a really bad school, and meet some new friends with something in common. Read more
Published 7 months ago by Todd Stockslager

4.0 out of 5 stars The beginnings of a main plot?
Ah, what can be better than shipping off a pathetic trio to an abusive private school? (And everyone likes to think they're so much better? Read more
Published 9 months ago by Emily Taylor

5.0 out of 5 stars A Lot of Mystery and High-Class Vocabulary
Have you ever wondered what it would be like living as an orphan whose rich parents passed away in a terrible fire? Well Violet, Klaus, and Sunny know. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Grade Six

5.0 out of 5 stars Very Strict Indeed
This is the 5th book in Lemony Snicket's "Series of Unfortunate Events". In this book, the Baudelaires are put in a boarding school where they are made to live in a shack... Read more
Published 14 months ago by Ann Sherry

5.0 out of 5 stars audio books
These audio books help children that are having trouble with the written word. I also use them in the car, so each trip we hear more of the story. Read more
Published 17 months ago by J. Landers

5.0 out of 5 stars A Series of Unfortunate Events Book
This book is wonderful. I bought it for my daughter in hopes she would read over the Christmas holiday. She did and loved it! It was ordered, shipped and received within 5 days. Read more
Published 18 months ago by K. Dennett

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