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Showing 1-6 of 6 posts in this discussion
Initial post: Mar 11, 2006 6:07:13 AM PST
Last edited by the author on Mar 11, 2006 6:15:21 AM PST
E. Davy says:
Hi folks. I am an Australian mum of a very strong willed Miss 5. We are getting results from the book but it's hard work. I wish Robert had included more on what a strong-will can achieve later in life. To help me keep faith in the long view... What do you all think? What do you think the unique and beautiful aspects of a strong will are? How do you think strong willed kids turn out as adults, with and without being well parented (ie. what are the consequences, yep there's that word again, of them not getting the boundaries they need). Can we help them turn negative persistence into positive persistence. Robert if you are reading this, please make a response. As a strong willed person myself, I have seen the benefits of a strong will, but also the down side. It's all a bit close to home. Can't wait to hear from you.

Libby

In reply to an earlier post on Aug 15, 2007 3:33:44 PM PDT
[Deleted by the author on Aug 15, 2007 3:34:17 PM PDT]

In reply to an earlier post on Dec 27, 2007 8:43:02 AM PST
W. Overton says:
I've watched my niece, who was one of the most strong-willed children I've ever met, grow up to be one of the most conscientious, responsible teenagers I've ever met. She is a leader in all respects, an independent thinker, and has chosen to use her strengths for good. I have always believed the strong-willed child is tomorrow's leader, and my niece is an example of this.

Of course, I'm hopeful that I'm right, because I am raising a very strong-willed child myself. Whew!

In reply to an earlier post on May 13, 2008 7:23:25 PM PDT
VA Mom says:
Your little girl will grow up knowing her own mind. She won't be bamboozled by the wrong crowd. She won't need to be a follower just to be liked. She will recognize the value of being liked for herself and she will always be able to speak her mind. Think Susan B. Anthony, Gloria Steinem, Margaret Thatcher.

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 19, 2009 7:36:38 AM PDT
Hi, I too am an Australian mum, but raising my children in the USA - we have a strong-willed child aged 7. On the up side he is not a monster, he is not malicious in his actions or reasoning. He simply doesn't have self-control, impulsive, energetic, and seems to challenge us all the time. I realized awhile ago that, like a jackaroo checking the boundary fences and has to physically shake the fence to make sure it is still in-tact and strong, so to was my son. He would test the boundaries to make sure they are secure - but rarely would he defiantly cross them. Once I made that discovery, I simply relaxed and calmly reinforced the results of the testing but no longer felt challeneged personally. Our son needed to check each day so make sure he was secure ... for some odd reason. He is still as gun-ho as before, but I see that he does not look at the world and sees problems to stop him (like our eldest and compliant child), but rather as a challenge to be overcome. I will not 'break his will' as his will is what will get him through this life, but rather mold him to enable him to best use that incredible 'strong-willedness' to achieve whatever he is called to do/or sets his mind to. He can super-charge and encourage others around him, he brings a breath of fresh air and delight. His heart is incredibly tender and sensitive, many times he reaches out to help others instinctively. Not until I stopped looking at what I thought was 'problem child' did I begin to see more of who he is - I began to see a greater picture of who my precious so really is ... then I was able to start honing in on what needed to be encouraged as well as areas needing shaping. Never underestimate just how much change can happen by not only correcting when necessary, but with the encouragement and positive teaching of what good and right attributes he/she is learning. I am currently reading through a series of parenting books for children such as ours to gain a wider understanding, both from Christian and non-Christian authors - but making sure they are educated in their fields. There is hope and joy in our children ... just that it is taking longer and way more effort than other children ... Oh, but the outcome and gains are so worth it!

Posted on Jul 7, 2009 8:08:32 AM PDT
Last edited by the author on Jul 7, 2009 8:09:39 AM PDT
Tracy says:
I was a persistent child and both of my children (ages 2 and 4) seem to be just as persistent, if not more! I have accomplished a lot of good in my life, as I am not afraid to keep pushing boundaries when I see something that is going on that is not right. I am a high school math teacher and I have made my focus advocating for our students who are not as well-served by the school system as middle-class White students are. I am a strong, independent person who is happiest when the boundaries are clearly delineated so that I have the freedom to do as I please within them, but I am also not afraid to challenge those boundaries when I feel they may be having a negative effect on me or other people.

My mom and dad always emphasized that we need to care for others and they never let me or my brothers be deliberately mean or cruel to each other or other people. We have all chosen to focus our wills to make the world a better place - my one brother is a history teacher, and my other brother is in the field of theology, and in addition to my work in the schools, I advocate for expanded birthing choices for women, and full funding of midwife-attended births for Medicare recipients.

Parenting a strong-willed child is not easy, but you have the opportunity right now to have a huge influence on someone who will one day change the world (even if it's just a little part of it). Strong-willed, persistent people are such an asset to us - our job as parents is to make sure that our kids are able to focus that will in a positive way.
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Participants:  6
Total posts:  6
Initial post:  Mar 11, 2006
Latest post:  Jul 7, 2009

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