Customer Review

74 of 75 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars These are magic pants., May 11, 2013
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This review is from: Levi's Women's Plus-Size 512 Skinny Slim Fit Jean (Apparel)
**Updated 18 Feb 15 with current jean

As a human being constantly two sizes in pants at once, I despise purchasing new jeans. But you reach a point where you get desperate, and have to try something new. And these pants, they are indeed magic.

I pulled them out of the box and said, "These will never fit me."
I held them up to me and said "Nope, not going to fit."
I started to try them on and when they got stuck at the top of my thighs I said "Definitely never going to fit."
I finished putting them up and stared at the four inch gap between the button and fly and reaffirmed that observation.

I must have closed my eyes to miss the sparkly magic because when I buttoned them they fit like the best bespoke jeans you've ever had. So they're a little droopy where I have no butt to speak of. Who cares? They fit in the waist and they fit in the leg and at no point do I look like an old woman with diaper butt.

I might be fat, but I do actually really want to wear these (for once).

UPDATE: One pair of magic jeans will ultimately beget another. I'm so tired of terrible quality jeans for high quality prices (I'm throwing shade at you, Lane Bryant). My first pair went for nine months of almost daily wear before they wore out where my thighs rub together. Nine months! Magic pants, indeed.

But not all magic pants are built the same. If you want a pair with a lot of stretch, go with the Celestial. They stretch well when they go on (the magic effect attributed in my previous review), but you can get several day's wear out of them before they start to slip and they need to be washed to revert to their shape. I'll love you forever if you can find me another pair of stretch plus pants that do what these puppies do, I'm so tired of stretch things that fall off by the end of the day (my nonexistent butt does a terrible job holding them up). If you don't want the stretch, go with the Dark Night jeans. They're a dressier fabric and they don't stretch very much. Because of the limited stretch capacity you might want to consider ordering a size up, particularly if you're biggest in the front of the waist like me. The Dark Night jeans don't have the magical fit of the Celestial jeans, but they're a great fabric and really sturdy, particularly if you have a fiery passionate hatred of super-stretch jeans. Unfortunately, these jeans cannot solve your fiery passionate hatred of mass-market plus size clothes.

UPDATE (2/15): So here's the deal with these jeans- the color names have changed over time. But when the color name changes the cut, fit, and fabric of the jeans change as well. Thankfully, these jeans have gone from ultra-stretch straight leg jeans to dark wash, sturdy, actual skinny jeans. Levis is learning and it's a glorious thing for my ample and fabulous booty.

My dark night pair finally gave in to their vailiant struggle against the monumental forces of thigh friction, so I snagged a pair in soulful dark to replace them. Soulful dark is another sturdy, tighter weave. These won't completely stretch out in an hour (or even a full day's wear), unlike the old celestal ones which stretched out like a cheap hair tie. These glories are a lovely very dark flat blue wash, with no grain or feathering and no spandex stretch in sight. They're a very snug fit, so be real with yourself and consider ordering up if you have a lot of belly fat like I do.

They're still magic pants, but for a better reason- these bad boys are actually cut like a proper skinny jean! The legs are a slim fit all the way to the ankle, the waist is high enough to hold in your fat and avoid low rise-induced muffin top and they're long enough to look normal on a tall person! No straight-leg-is-skinny-on-a-fattie-right or awkward floodwater ankle cuts in sight! It's an absolute miracle, I didn't think this was possible to get from fat fashion. I'm sad I was so nice to these jeans before because Levis has legit nailed it with this version.

Now if only someone could explain this confusing feeling of satisfaction I get when I wear these...
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Showing 1-3 of 3 posts in this discussion
Initial post: May 15, 2014 9:55:52 PM PDT
Look'n UP says:
Too bad they don't rate reviewers, cuz honey you'd be my top after reading thousands! :-D

Eloquent, funny AND very helpful! Levis owes you! :-)

FIVE STARS!! And my thanks!

Posted on Aug 19, 2014 6:46:56 PM PDT
You're awesome.

Posted on Dec 29, 2014 7:08:48 PM PST
Best. Review. Ever. funkasaurusrex, thank you for such a well-written, humorous and to-the-point review. Sparkly magic, indeed.
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