522 of 540 people found the following review helpful
Holy Crap This Is Awesome,
This review is from: Red Dragon VT 3-30 C 500,000 BTU Heavy Duty Propane Vapor Torch Kit (Lawn & Patio)
I bought this thing while I was camping. Our firewood was a bit damp and I was having trouble getting the campfire started. With this handy-dandy roaster, I had a bonfire within a minute or so. Then, I decided to use it on the weeds at home. The instructions warn against using the torch near conifers (like Evergreen-type shrubs, bushes, topiaries), so I stayed about 5 feet away from those. Well, this thing is hotter than the blazes of Hell and Damnation itself! I roasted a few of my bushes, but thankfully, they've started to come back. We just had a few inches of snow here in Chicago and I drove over it in the driveway. I ended up with icy patches of packed snow and figured I'd pull out Satan's air conditioner. Not only did it melt those ice patches faster than a hooker drops her panties, it melted a five foot section of snow (about 3 inches deep) in front of the nozzle. Well, after that, I just had to screw around with it. I cooked a frozen hot-dog in less than 30 seconds. OK, "cooked" is the wrong word. I turned a frozen hot dog into a pile of ash. Since that was fun, I tried it with an old cell-phone I had laying around. It stunk, but man it was cool to watch it turn into a gelatinous pile of stink. Someone else mentioned having to roast your weeds and then come back to weed by hand a week later. That's totally unnecessary. Just hold the flame on the weed for about 10 seconds and it'll kill it, burn it, turn it to ash, and then burn the ash into smaller ash. The roots will be dead and the weed will never return. OK, maybe it will, but I roasted a section of stone in my backyard that had weeds growing up. It's been nearly 2 years and nothing has grown there. Yeah, it sounds like a jet engine when you fire it up, but it's awesome! I highly recommend this for weed burning, camp fire starting, party tricks, and hot dog cremation. And next week, I'm going to head over to my mean, old, crotchety neighbor's house in the middle of the night and burn "A-Hole" into his lawn. Man, I can't wait till my kid's hamster bites the dust!
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Showing 1-10 of 34 posts in this discussion
Initial post: May 23, 2009 3:35:02 PM PDT
Marie E. Toenniessen says:
LOL! Thanks for the cool review.... it was a fun read. :)
Posted on Oct 6, 2009 3:34:39 PM PDT
J. Johnston says:
Loved your comments! I'm getting this for my husband for our anniversary and I'm making a copy of your review to go along with it. He'll enjoy it and probably do all the same things. Boys.
Posted on Dec 10, 2009 4:43:19 PM PST
Francis X. Amsler says:
I read this review to my 15 year old son and he said, so are you buying the 100,000 BTU or 500,000 BTU? I told him, we definitely "need" the 500,000 BTU toy. Great review.
Posted on Jan 3, 2010 8:41:35 AM PST
Hey Gary! You may have a career waiting for you in product review writing. I enjoyed your narrative and now I MUST have the 500K BTU unit as I want to hear that jet engine sound when I dispatch weeds to there own private little hell. I'll really enjoy torching the thistle that is trying to overtake my 3 acres. Send pics of your neighbor's lawn!
Posted on Feb 12, 2010 10:12:28 AM PST
Posted on Apr 3, 2010 7:43:55 AM PDT
J. Lee says:
I laughed so hard I had to wipe my eyes down to keep reading reviews.
Posted on Jan 9, 2011 4:23:42 PM PST
Brian Battuello says:
Review of the year award. MUST BUY BURNER!!!
Posted on Jan 12, 2011 10:24:59 AM PST
Thanks for the review, sent it to my husband, he'll really appreciate it since he deals with the weeds and the snow and ice more than I do!
Posted on Feb 2, 2011 10:33:50 AM PST
S. L. Brown says:
The best review I've ever read. Bar none.
Posted on Apr 22, 2011 7:56:57 AM PDT
Steven D. Hemmig says:
Great review Gary and thanks for the laugh!