4 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Absurd, insultingly poor sci-fi with clownish acting.,
This review is from: Battleship (Amazon Instant Video)
Taylor Kitsch portrays yet another sullen and stubborn youth with authority issues (when has he ever done anything else?), who joins the Navy and somehow becomes a Lieutenant in what cannot be more than a year or two. The aliens, despite being able to travel across interstellar space with the purpose of conquest somehow cannot identify a threat unless it's looking at them. Their weapons technology and especially their ability to shoot straight or track targets are woefully inadequate to their mission. Rhianna never distinguishes herself other than to look completely miscast and out of place. Miscasting is especially rampant in this movie, where even Liam Neeson cannot mask his accent when he tries to deliver an emotional, and poorly written line.
Good science fiction is at the very least plausible, if not it's simply techo-fanatsy. This film fails on so many levels it's difficult to address them but one that stands out is the act where a war memorial battleship (USS Missouri) is somehow brought into action complete with with live shells for the main guns. To get these guns to fire requires a handful of men to carry a shell through the ship to the gun that needs it. Since these shells weight a ton (literally) it would be an impossible feat for 3 times as many men.
For a easily impressionable child the massive explosions and clownish bad-boy behavior of Kitsch (making a strong case for the worst actor in Hollywood), this film might provide a short time of brain-numbing imagery and slapstick comedy. For a Navy veteran and huge fan of good science fiction it just seemed like another poorly written Transformers episode. You might argue that it's a throwaway summertime movie, but that doesn't excuse dialog and situations completely ignorant of reality.