Customer Review

4,277 of 4,655 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Could not finish, February 3, 2012
This review is from: Fifty Shades of Grey (Paperback)
1.5 stars

I don't enjoy writing bad reviews, honestly it puts a sick feeling in my stomach, but at the moment I am feeling too annoyed not to write one. So please don't get snarky - I do realise I am in the minority with my opinions.

OK, I couldn't finish this book. I tried, holy hell did I try - but by 88% I was so annoyed I had to put it down.

And after a lot of contemplation I have decided not to rant and rave, but simply state in point form what I didn't like.

~ The writing was too sterile. There was no depth and I found it hard connecting to any of it. There was a whole heap of - I touched him, he touched me, I did this, he did that. And it wasn't engaging at all.
When I read I want to be able to feel the emotion, not be told how a scene is playing out as if the heroine is actually an observer.

~ The sex - it wasn't hot at all. I wouldn't even classify it as erotic. For some strange reason I have the opinion that you need to be able to refer to your vagina as something more erotic than 'down there' before you can pull off a significant hotness rating.

~ Christian - ok, he was relatively hot but not enough to get my blood pumping. He wasn't alpha enough for me. One moment he is trying to be hard core the next he is gasping because she is wearing his underwear.
Now if that was my dominant alpha, he would have given me a cocky smile, licked his lips and gave that 'how you doin' look, But no, he gasped like a little girl.

~ The price....I don't get it. How can a publisher charge this much for a book written so badly?? **This refers to the price it was set when first release**

.....ok, I could go on, I could practically write a novel, but I won't.

I will take my Inner Goddess (seriously if I had to read that line one more time I would have caused self harm) and find something else to read.
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Comments

Tracked by 20 customers

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Showing 91-100 of 452 posts in this discussion
Posted on Mar 14, 2012 9:30:58 PM PDT
Wallaby says:
Thanks for the good review. I already knew I would not like this book after reading David Shobin's hilarious review. The book sounds sickening, really. I have learned to avoid the books on Kindle promoted by Amazon, most are real stinkers.

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 14, 2012 9:39:33 PM PDT
Hi Wallaby, Thanks for the comment.

I enjoy erotic romance so our opinions on what is 'sickening' would probably differ, although there was one scene in this book that made me put it down never to be picked up again.

I just didn't think this book was well written.

Thanks again for commenting :)

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 14, 2012 10:46:46 PM PDT
[Customers don't think this post adds to the discussion. Show post anyway. Show all unhelpful posts.]

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 12:20:57 AM PDT
Cud L. Fish says:
This review made me steamy... down there.

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 15, 2012 12:52:48 AM PDT
LMAO!! I needed that chuckle.Thank you

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 9:44:43 AM PDT
Wallaby says:
You are right, Judith when you say that well-known authors (James Patterson?) can sell some real stinkers. But, I have to say I have been burned several times by Kindle offerings that turned out to be, well real stinkers. One main problem is that the editing did not catch hundreds of very poor grammar and usage. I know better now, and will not buy these again. Riverina is right, the writing is "too sterile," predictable and puerile.
I know that any erotic fiction that describes S and M and requires safe words is not hot to me, just sickening.
I'm not sure what ceratly means, but good luck with your indie book.

In reply to an earlier post on Mar 15, 2012 11:20:19 AM PDT
Thanks for the kindness in the review -- I'm an author, and I have very few one-stars (and the ones I do have seem to be politically motivated) -- but it is hard to read them for the writer. Somehow I don't think this author is suffering too much. She's riding her success all the way to the bank!

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 12:06:01 PM PDT
SO happy to read all of this. I only heard about the series yesterday on news radio and it was compared to Twilight. I attempted to read the first book of Twilight because my students were into it. I should have thought twice when I could get it in the MIDDLE SCHOOL library. If this series is compared to Twilight, as the news talk and this thread did, and it's written "sterile" (great reveiw) I DO NOT WANT IT!!! Thank you. I am removing it from my shopping cart.

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 12:27:19 PM PDT
S. Stephens says:
Thank you for the honest review. It made me look inside the book before I clicked the "buy now" button. I would have been dissapointed. And for $10. too. I don't like books that are written in the first person point of view.
Thank you so much for saving me time and money. I have better things to read that cost a lot less.

Posted on Mar 15, 2012 1:17:58 PM PDT
Katarinaq says:
Thanks for this review! I am into this lifestyle - a legitimate part of my relationship but I've never heard of it being a genre of books. This book was all over Yahoo as some sort of savior to the modern marriage. I had no idea it started out as Fanfiction (which makes me not want to read it more). Additionally, the series being alike to Twilight is enough to deter me, haha. All the comments related to your review were also helpful - I will not waste my money on a hyped up joke of BDSM.
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