Stay away!, December 28, 2003

After you watch Swept Away, your answer about Madonna's acting abilities will be negative. Madonna is always Madonna no matter how hard she is trying to convince you she is not. Madonna is like that wolf from the fable who tries to disguise himself in the lamb skin, but all in vain. Either wolf's ears show up, or his tail or his teeth start to show. During the movie I was unable to get away from the impression that I am watching some Madonna's home video recorded by Guy for their private viewing.

The movie is supposed to be a remake of the 1975 movie. The basic story is that a bitchy wife (no idea on what account) of a rich businessman and a bunch of friends go on holidays on a boat. Something happens and Madonna and some other loser actor get stuck on a deserted Island Bonita. A horrible wife gets tamed by a loser, they fall in love, and yadayada.

The movie is not funny, it is heavy handed, and you don't believe a word of what they say on the screen. The only idea I had all movie through (yes, I took the pain to watch it to the end) was how Madonna got herself in this mess?

At some point I was thinking to myself what if Madonna doesn't have friends who can tell her that her movies suck, and that she should do something about it. Who knows? In any case, Swept Away is no good. If you buy it, you'd waste your bucks. Unless of course you are a Madonna's fan and can eat Madonna under any sauce. In this case, the movie is a delicacy for you :-)

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