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on May 2, 2011
Ever have a friend who keeps trying to get you to read a book you just know you won't like? That was certainly the case with The Oldest Living Vampire Tells All. First off, I hated the title. It sounded too much like Allan Gurganus' The Oldest Living Confederate Widow Tells All, a book that I thoroughly enjoyed. Then there's the author's name - Rod Redux - which sounds a bit like the stage name of a actor in '80s porn. Finally, the description of the book made it sound like Jean Auel had ingested some sort of hallucinogenic drug and decided to plop a vampire down in the middle of her Clan of the Cave Bear series. Uh-uh. No sir! No way!

Finally, over a long weekend, I wanted something quick and escapist to read and settled on Redux's Oldest Living Vampire Tells All. Expecting a campy vampiric satire, I started reading and made an interesting discovery. The book wasn't bad at all. In fact, I found myself almost compulsively turning pages wanting to find out more about Gon, the 30,000-year-old member of a hunter-gatherer society who becomes a vampire.

Sure, there were places that strained credibility. For one, many researchers now believe that our ancestors and the Neanderthals had little or no interactions ... certainly not the interbreeding that takes place in the novel. Still, I have to admit being intrigued by Redux's description of Gon's family life; a group marriage consisting of Gon's male partner, a Neanderthal female and a Cro Magnon female. This is not the world of Jean Auel's Ayla and her hunky cave-stud Jondalar. As some reviewers have mentioned, there are some fairly graphic desciptions of sex in the book, but those hardly rise to the level of paleo-porn some reviewers describe.

If there's one frustration I do have with The Oldest Living Vampire Tells All it's that there's a lot of build-up to Gon actually becoming a vampire ... and then no real explanation for the origin of vampirism. Granted, it's only the first in a series, so I'll hold off judging it too harshly because it leaves questions unanswered.

All in all, I found the book to be a unique entry in the plethora of vampire fiction available today. And I'm looking forward to re-entering the world of Gon in future volumes of his saga. The Oldest Living Vampire series may not be a classic, but as an enjoyable way to pass time I was pleasantly surprised.
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TOP 1000 REVIEWERon February 2, 2011
As an avid horror fan this is not the type of book I usually buy. The reviews and the description at amazon (A blend of historic fact, fearsome fantasy and explicit sex)caught my attention. It was an interesting, well written, and enjoyable story. Even though it's not exactly my type, I'll be reading part 2 to see what happens to Gon next. As for all the reviewers who were shocked by the sex... well I guess if you are easily shocked this book is not for you. However there have been far more graphic sex scenes in so called romance novels.
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on March 8, 2011
This book, once opened, was incredibly hard to put down. I am constantly looking for more to read about "The Vampire" and I can tell you I was severly upset when the book came to its final reading sentences. I wanted to know more about what happend to Gon after the glacier era. This book is believable in the fact no other author that I have yet to read from, has gone to depths and details of vampirism. He takes you back 30,000 years when he was just a young boy in his tribe. Back then the Saber toothed cats were still roaming the lands and other intelligent species besides humans were still living. One would have to read this book to understand. If anyone out there is one who is always searching for answers and evidece (if you will) that vampires are real, this is a great book to read. The way the author talks to you in the book, draws you in. He asks questions to you, to make you understand and realize that vampirism isn't fancy and glory like Hollywood shows it to be. I need more from this author! This book is incredible!
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on February 19, 2011
Finally,a vampire novel with no love-stricken teenage/vampire angst. Couldn't read this one fast enough and was thankful I got it with the second in the series included. The only disappointment was when I found out the third one isn't out yet. Not since the Covenant With the Vampire series have a I read a vampire story for real adults I enjoyed this much.

More please!
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on May 7, 2011
I really enjoyed this book! There are always different takes on how vampires are and I like the authors idea of how a vampire should be, glad he went with something distinct. I would say this book is for a more mature audience.
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on August 21, 2015
Where does The Oldest Living Vampire Tells All: Revised and Expanded rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
I very much enjoyed a different point of view of a vampires beings and current life.

What was one of the most memorable moments of The Oldest Living Vampire Tells All: Revised and Expanded?
When Gon Killed his maker. Wow that was an intense moment in the book.

What does Ian M. Walker bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
This great rough voice. He sounds like a 30,000 year old vampire.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
I thought it was so cute when Gon was 1st falling in love with his wife.

Any additional comments?
This is the 1st book that I have listened to by Joseph Duncan and Narrated by Ian M. Walker. I received this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

I was very interested throughout the entire book. I love history, I like vampire stories and I really enjoy stories of the 1st humans.
Gon is the main character in the book. He has what sounded like the most perfect life growing up with a loving family. Than to being a young man falling in love. I thought the idea of sharing a house hold with more than one wife and husband would be ideal. Everyone would share and take care of each other. The children would grow up loved and safer with 2 more adults looking after them. I felt so sorry for Gon he had everything and lost it all. The only thing he was able to walk away with was the fact that he was able to claim his revenge of the one that took it all from him. I liked too that it was nothing like any vampire book I have ever listened too. What a clever imagination the author must have to tell this story. It was a fun twist on what really happened to the Neanderthal's.

This is the second book that I have listened that Ian M. Walker has narrated. He was amazing again. He used a very rough voice that really fits the 30,000 year old Gon.
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on August 17, 2014
I'm giving this novella two stars because I appreciate the author's imagination. The Cro-Magnon vampire idea and the Paleolithic world he describes, is a somewhat different approach in the genre, and I enjoyed getting to know the protagonist in the beginning. The blood and gore is part of the genre--it is a vampire novel after all.
However, I was quite disappointed at the level of editing. There are numerous errors in the text that could have been avoided by a good professional reader. Again and again I was stopped in the narrative by simple bad grammer, or, in one case, a sentence was attributed to the wrong character. Words were attributed to a person who had already left the scene. It was easy to figure out who should have said what, but it is disappointing in a "published" book. It's not that difficult to get an editor.
Another problem is the length of these novellas. They are short, and the ebook price is the same as for a full length novel. So you are getting 1/3 of a book and will spend three times as much for the same amount of product. I realize that art is hard to quantify and price, but it's kind of a chintzy marketing scheme.
Thirdly, and most significant to me, a scene occurs in the second "book" which is pure kiddy porn. I am not prudish nor do I dislike well done erotica, but there is a long passage in the second "chronicle" describing the abuse, beating, and repeated rape of a little girl. Again and again the narrator describes her degradation, becoming more excited at her brokenness, physical and mental. This passage continues for some time. It did not move the narrative of the story along, added nothing to the character development of the protagonist, but just seemed to be a long gratuitous, lascivious description of child rape and torture. Who is getting off on this? The author or the assumed reader?
After that I stopped reading.
Good imagination, poor editing, excessive prurience. This is the unfortunate side of self-publishing.
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on October 30, 2014
I can't believe the bad rap this story is getting - I thought Gon's storytelling was awesome! I don't understand what everyone is getting so bent out of shape about in the slang department when it is obvious that Gon was speaking in contemporary terms so that we could understand their dialogue. It's no different than reading any other book that's been translated, like us manga or yaoi fans. This narrative was refreshingly imaginative and unique and brought to life an age that human beings alive now will only ever be able to speculate about in the most boring detail and this author did so in the most unique way imaginable by taking his vampire out of the cliches and breathing new life into a topic of paranormal fiction that has been nearly told to death by the retelling of the same vampire stories over and over again (you guys know what I'm talking about - those stories where vampires are fighting for the glory and honor of their pack while trying not to fall in love with some unsuspecting mortal girl with a secret, the kind where she might actually be half werewolf or half vampire or half...you get the point.) But vampires and cavemen? Come on, it doesn't get anymore unique than that!

Gon is a 30,000 year old vampire who speaks very bluntly and makes no apologies for it. For that reason there is very explicit content in here that, understandably so, drew some backlash in some of the less flattering reviews. The offending scenes involves a pre-adolescent Gon and his companions engaging in some rather mature behavior and the vulgar terms used to describe the content did make it a bit awkward to read and have to picture children that age acting out the scenes described. So, yes, I was a bit uncomfortable reading that particular scene, but I will come to this author's defense all the same for writing it because he was trying to make the narrative authentic and is speaking through Gon and his experiences. You can easily skip it altogether since it doesn't harm the rest of the story in any way, but do realize that erotic themes remain prevalent throughout most of the story, although it isn't heavily emphasized like your traditional vampire romance.

With that said, this isn't a romance at all. This book is exactly what it says it is - a tell all. And it quite obviously doesn't end here. Gon has had a loooong life so this series could go on indefinitely couldn't it? I hope so. I haven't been this entertained by a vampire story in a long time and I happen to like learning about prehistoric life so even though Mr. Duncan's paleolithic environment has very little bearing on what scientists have come to learn of the real environment of that time, I appreciate his fictional account of life for the cro-magnons and neanderthals and the harmony shared between them. So for those of you turned off by a little commune lovin' and cavemen who are way smarter than the human beings who are alive and running things now, then you're not gonna show Gon any love. That's okay - go back to reading Twilight. But if you want a vampire story told from one who was alive before Moses parted the Red Sea and Jesus Christ was performing his miracles, then this is your read. I can't wait to go on to the next.
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on May 5, 2011
I thoroughly loved this book. The story of Gon and his humble beginnings to become a 30,000 year old vampire is both exciting, and at the same time, sad and poignant. If you like vampire stories, this gives you a whole new way to look at them. Don't get me wrong, I love the Twilight series, but this book gives you a whole different, and probably more truthful version of what it means to be a vampire. Can't wait to read the further editions as they come out!
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on January 3, 2013
The flow of the words from the vampire, narrator, in this book makes you experience his life as a vampire. The oldest vampire as he says. You learn of how he becomes a vampire and his life from there... Good read.
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