Most helpful critical review
21 of 23 people found the following review helpful
Terrible storyline, ragged events, AND begging for an editor
on May 18, 2009
I had a VERY DIFFICULT time reading this book digitally on my IPhone. EVERY PARAGRAPH OF THE STORY needs an edit. I am NOT kidding. There are spelling errors and/or misuses of punctuation in every single paragraph. A 12-year-old would even be upset trying to read this story because you have to mentally correct the grammatical errors before you can even begin to grasp the meaning of the story. Wow, I am very angered that I paid .80 for this story.
The storyline jumps ALL OVER THE PLACE and events are random and disconnected from the plot. There are so many time lapses that the reader is forced to figure out what has happened in the interim, because there are surely no clues given from the author.
None of the characters gains the sympathy of the reader. And the story is told from SO MANY points of view that it is sometimes impossible to know who is speaking because the author switches the characters mid-paragraph. The storyline itself is so IMPLAUSIBLE that it is truly laughable and ultimately makes no sense.
I am volunteering to edit the story and get it corrected before anyone else buys this. I am serious. I want a refund.