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unChristian: What a New Generation Really Thinks about Christianity... and Why It Matters

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I grew up in the church. My parents were ministers. I did overseas missions work, and I now write novels with characters who deal with the spiritual questions we face in the world of steel and greed and humanity. My first twenty years of life I was a gung-ho believer, ready to change the world. The next twenty years, I tried to change the church through ministry positions, toeing the lines, trying to gain the respect and authority to have a say.

I believe I wasted my time. There are too many who want to hold onto what has always been, instead of seeing it for what it has become. I wish I had simply done all the things I felt I should be doing--helping the poor, the HIV-infected, and knowing Jesus as a lifestyle, not just on Sunday mornings. "unChristian" is one of the most precise books I've come across, for its unflinching stare into the mirror. It deals with most of the critical observations that "outsiders" have, but these are really the same observations of any honest Christian. In fact, by working for the past fifteen years outside of the "ministry," I could've identified almost to a T every criticism outlined in this book. Simply step out of the ivory tower and you'll see and hear all these issues raised.

While "unChristian" can come across somewhat dry and prosaic in its dispensing of information, it is a valuable and necessary dissertation on the ills of our current form of Christianity. It's also a sincere and noble call back to those things that we should be about. The authors don't pull punches, but they do write with grace and love for the church of Christ's followers, regardless of denomination or style. This should be a book for every Christian to consider somberly and prayerfully.

unChristian: What a New Generation Really Thinks about Christianity...and Why It Matters
David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons
ISBN: 978-0-8010-1300-3 ISBN-10: 0-8010-1300-3

unChristian is not your typical Christian book. It did not need to be. Neither should one expect it to be.
unChristian is unSettling.
unChristian will either humble or anger the Christian reader.
Research has shown that Busters and Mosaics (Terms that are used to specify young people aged 16-29) do not have a good opinion of Christians.
That should not really be surprising. I'm a pastor and I know that I don't have a good opinion of Christians in general. Oh, people are nice to me and I enjoy the ministry. I pastor a group of people who treat me as family. My experience has shown me, however, that Christians can be very unChristian. This book tells us that people on the outside of the church see us that way, too. Having read the book, I don't have a very good opinion of myself. I have a long way to go in learning to show grace, mercy, and compassion.
Many of those who were interviewed were not always on the outside of the church. Their experiences on the inside drove them out, however. It is commonly known that the Christian church is the army that shoots its wounded.
As a pastor I have battled legalism. I am all for grace. I did not realize how much legalism was still in me, however. In seeking to stand for righteousness I have been less than gracious and accepting of people who sin. We Christians are unChristian because we are a self-righteous, arrogant group of people who do not listen because we are convinced that we (though we say that the Bible does, we act as if we do) have all the answers. We give advice where it is not requested. We condemn when we should be helping. We complain about the state of the world, but do little to change it. We say that we hate the sin, but love the sinner. Our actions declare that we hate both.
We are unChristian in our attitudes because we are often obnoxious and rude to those who don't believe or live as we do. The unChristian church is characterized by what they are against instead of what they are for. We are negative and hostile to those who don't fit our mold.
While telling us all of these things the authors maintain a very gracious attitude toward the church (after all, they are part of the church), and do not call for moral and theological compromise. They do call for us to seek to understand people. They call for us to seek to empathize and sympathize. They call for us to recognize the fact that all sexual sin is sin; not just homosexual sin. They remind us of the fact that kindness and compassion will do much to help those who commit these sins, but that picketing their funerals and their parades will do little to help them. The research of the authors demonstrates to us the need to hold to traditional Christian beliefs, but to let go of or unChristian attitudes and methodologies. After all, we are not ministering well as we are.
The book is well written, I must say. To me it is gripping. I intended to read it at at leisurely pace and not tie myself to it. I did not do so. I read it every opportunity that I had. I could hardly put it down. The personal anecdotes from those interviewed give authenticity and authority to the message of the book. The message of the book is this: we are behaving in an unChristian manner; we must get over our Pharisaic ways and begin to minister as Jesus Christ did. After all, He was kind and compassionate to the outcasts and sinners. He did not call them names. He loved them.
Now, please excuse me while I go and repent.

In his book The Heart of Christianity (2003) Marcus Borg of Oregon State University describes how his university students have a uniformly negative image of Christianity. "When I ask them to write a short essay on their impression of Christianity," says Borg, "they consistently use five adjectives: Christians are literalistic, anti-intellectual, self-righteous, judgmental, and bigoted."

Christians might object, rather defensively, that it's unfair to draw sweeping conclusions based upon the report of one person. If you think that way, you'd be right in your logic but wrong in your conclusion. A new book called unChristian (2007) by David Kinnaman of the Barna Group presents objective research that supports Borg's subjective anecdote. Kinnaman's three-year study documents how an overwhelming percentage of sixteen to twenty-nine year olds view Christians with hostility, resentment and disdain.

These broadly and deeply negative views of Christians aren't just superficial stereotypes with no basis in reality, says Kinnaman. Nor are the critics people who've had no contact with churches or Christians. It would be a tragic mistake, he argues, for believers to protest that outsider outrage at Christians is a misperception. Rather, it's based upon their real experiences with today's Christians. In addition to their statistical research, the book includes anecdotes from people who were interviewed, follow-on comments at the end of each chapter by some 30 Christian leaders, and reflections about why we've come to such a place and how we might make it better.

According to Kinnaman's Barna study, here are the percentages of people outside the church who think that the following words describe present-day Christianity:

* antihomosexual 91%
* judgmental 87%
* hypocritical 85%
* old-fashioned 78%
* too political 75%
* out of touch with reality 72%
* insensitive to others 70%
* boring 68%

It would be hard to overestimate, says Kinnaman, "how firmly people reject-- and feel rejected by-- Christians" (19). Or think about it this way, he suggests: "When you introduce yourself as a Christian to a friend, neighbor, or business associate who is an outsider, you might as well have it tattooed on your arm: antihomosexual, gay-hater, homophobic. I doubt you think of yourself in these terms, but that's what outsiders think of you" (93).

Gabe Lyons of the Fermi Project who commissioned the Barna research remembers his first look at the data. "I'll never forget sitting in Starbucks, poring through the research results on my laptop. As I soaked it in, I glanced at the people around me and was overwhelmed with the thought that this is what they think of me. It was a sobering thought to know that if I had stood up and announced myself as a 'Christian' to the customers assembled in Starbucks that day, they would have associated me with every one of the negative perceptions described in this book" (222, his italics). Sad to say, Marcus Borg was even more right than he knew.

One thing that's always been a little challenging for me is when christians are portrayed poorly on tv and film. I love it when it's funny (think Owen Wilson in Meet the Parents). But, when it's just harsh and cynical, it kind of bugs me because it doesn't seem to accurately reflect the genuine people I know who are investing their lives following Jesus.

That said though, there are some equally genuine people, who I love dearly and are not christians, who really do have some harsh and cynical views of us. And, I've been thinking lately that it might be a good idea for all of us christians to take some time and consider what they're perceiving. Who knows? We might just learn something important.

If you want to get an objective read on what people think about christians and why it matters, please go get David Kinnaman's new book and give it a read. David Kinnaman is someone I trust deeply. His work is always well researched, well written, fair and honest.

I think any thoughtful person would appreciate what he has to say.

For some reason I had a hard time finishing this book. I would read awhile and then put the book aside for some time before picking it up again. I knew I needed to read it, but had a difficult time doing so. Perhaps it is because I don't really want to know how bad things are for Christianity and the future. In spite of the positive comments about the future found in the back of the book, the body of material is disturbing indeed.

It has not escaped notice that the 19-35 yr. olds are largely absent in our churches. We can keep children through High School and then . . . . what happens to them? Although the book is not specifically addressing the needs of children raised in the church, the material gives great insight into what their peers are thinking and, undoubtedly, what causes many of them to leave the fold as well.

The book has heightened my sensitivities and has caused me to repent of certain attitudes. God help us to be the people he has created us to be.

"Christianity has an image problem." That's how unChristian begins, and it is the problem it attempts to resolve, not by explaining the Christian faith to non-Christians, but by urging professing Christians to fix their image in 6 specific areas. According to the research done for this book (from the Barna Group), Christians are accused of being hypocritical, insincere in their efforts to convert people, antihomosexual, sheltered, too political, and judgmental. Because of these accusations, the writers contend, evangelical Christians, or those who are considered to be "born again," have lost the respect of those outside the church. These non-Christians consider the Christian faith as it is practiced today to be unChristian, that is, "they think Christians no longer represent what Jesus had in mind, that Christianity in our society is not what it was meant to be" (p. 15). Are they right?

It is tough to argue with the data gathered from the research. The authors make a convincing case that even those inside the church--young Christians in particular--agree that something has gone terribly wrong with modern Christianity. I found myself nodding in agreement quite a bit as I read the accusations hurled at the faith I myself possess. If our faith has become "unChristian," we must not delay in working to fix it. And even if we are tempted to think that it doesn't really matter what non-Christians think about us since non-believers will always disapprove of what we believe (the authors field this charge and respond to it on pp. 36-39), we have to realize that perceptions, even wrong perceptions, still affect the way people respond to us. If as Christians we desire to be heard by non-Christians, then we would do well to listen first to them.

As for the specific allegations leveled at us, can there be any doubt that Christians by and large are guilty of being hypocritical? It is true that for many of us our lives do not reflect what we say we believe. And we can surely understand that many of our attempts at evangelism have lacked in genuine interest for the person with whom we are sharing our faith. Yes, the Christian faith can seem "like a religion of rules and standards" (p. 123), and surely many of us have far too often made others feel like we were judgmental, setting ourselves up as the judge and jury of morality. We are known more for what we are against than for what we are for. We are too quickly associated with a political party and with antihomosexual values. What is helpful in this book is the authors' ability to help us see why we should not wear many of these charges as badges of honor. Each chapter concludes with a section from various contributors explaining ways in which we might change these perceptions of non-Christians.

There are, however, a couple of areas in which I think the authors have erred.

First, in chapter 5, in which the authors' deal with the accusation that Christians are unloving and hostile to homosexuals, I found the authors to be wrong about some of their conclusions. They quote (favorably) one pastor who says, "the struggle of gays being attracted to the same sex is no different than my struggle in being attracted to the opposite sex" (96, emphasis mine). Now I agree that the sin of homosexuality is no different than the sin of immoral heterosexuality as far as God's judgment of sin is concerned. But the Bible does suggest that there is a progression in reprobation, and according to Romans 1, homosexuality is further down that progression than other sins. The authors also ask if "we really want government regulating the sex lives of its adult citizens" (96). Does this mean that we should oppose a Federal Marriage Amendment? Do the authors think that government should not regulate morality in any way? I agree that "we cannot assume that politics is the only or best way to influence people" (106) and that we can further burn the bridges by which we hope to reach homosexuals by unloving political jargon. But this doesn't mean that Christians should abdicate this issue politically and cease in our efforts to influence our legislators toward a biblical morality. The authors also imply that we shouldn't speak so passionately against the right of homosexuals to adopt children because "our most important concern must be the response of young people to Christ, not merely what type of home they grew up in." While there is much to learn from this book's chapter on homosexuality, I was disappointed by these suggestions that we shouldn't fight the issue politically because of the potential that our opinions will alienate the homosexuals we should be trying to reach with the gospel.

Second, and perhaps even more importantly, there is a potentially fatal flaw in the research that supports this book. On page 46 the authors tell us that in their research, "when it came to nonreligious factors--the substance of people's daily choices, actions, and attitudes--there were few meaningful gaps between born-again Christians and non-born-agains." The point is clear: this book is built upon the assumption from the research that born-again Christians do not live much differently from those who are not born-again. The authors even tell us how they identify those who are born-again: "a person has to say he or she has made a personal commitment to Jesus that is still important and that the person believes he or she will go to heaven at death, because the person has confessed his or her sin and accepted Christ as Savior" (46). Based on these conclusions, the book attempts to help these "born-again" Christians recover an authentic Christian faith.

But a survey cannot identify true "born-again" Christians without error. Just because a person makes the necessary profession to be classified doesn't mean he or she really is. The authors say that two out of every five adults nationwide qualifies as being "born again." Really? Forty percent of adult Americans are born again? What the authors miss is that behavior is a better identifier of regeneration. Of course, only God knows those who are truly his, but the Bible says we are to inspect the "fruit" of people's lives in discerning those who are truly born-again (1 John 3:10). I do not deny that true believers are often guilty of the accusations leveled at them in this book by non-Christians. But I do think that Christianity gets much of its bad reputation from those who are not truly born again. So I'm afraid the research for this book is skewed.
Nevertheless, the damage is done to the Christian reputation, even if the guilty party are those who profess to be Christians but truly are not. Keeping that in mind, this book does offer some helpful advice for Christians who truly desire to convey to "outsiders" what it means to be Christian. I give this book 4 stars.

For decades we've heard Christians blame society for the dwindling popularity of Christianity. Now David Kinnaman lends overwhelming statistical support to the truth - that we Christians are largely to blame for the decline of Christianity in America.

Why are we to blame? Because we behave in an "UnChristian" manner, especially in the areas of hypocrisy, pushy evangelism, hatred for gays, cutting ourselves off from society, judgmentalism, and the Religious Right (these are chapters 3-8 in the book).

Chapters 3-5 are the hardest to fix. For example, it's impossible for all Christians to avoid being hypocritical, because we all do things that we don't believe we should, and some Christians do things they think are right that other Christians believe are sin. Also, the Bible does speak ill of homosexuality in four places, so it's hard to agree with the Bible here without offending the public. It's impossible to follow the Bible and please the people on every count (and the author seems to understand that); nonetheless, these chapters educate us on what the public feels, so we can have some empathy for them and better relate to them.

Where this book disappointed me is in its lack of Bible verses supporting its arguments. For example, the Bible is loaded with anti-judgmentalism verses. And it never records Jesus or His disciples trying to make non-Christians or non-Jews follow Christian morality (neither on a personal nor political level) without first becoming Christians. Also, the Bible contains over 100 quotes opposing greed and oppression of the poor. Many of these are contrary to the interests of the Religious Right and its support of all things Republican. It's these anti-biblical behaviors that drive so many away from the church.

Despite containing insufficient Bible quotes, I recommend this book for every Christian, because it directs our finger-pointing inward to a place where we can each make a difference, and because it seeks to realign the church with God's will - a church that's other-centered rather than self-promoting.

While the information is definitely useful, Kinnaman's research of a younger generation's perception of Christianity clearly has its flaws. Sure, young people today see "Christians" as hypocrites, too political, anti-homosexual and judgmental and there is a lot that Christians and the church can learn from these assessments and opinions. But Kinnaman never turns to look at his own generations and their blurred vision of reality in the first place - the generation that chooses loyalty to their tribe over truth, or tolerates any and all lifestyle choices as legitimate - Kinnaman needs to follow up unChristian with a book written to his generation addressing their own messed up perspective on the world!

David Kinnaman relates an anecdote during the introduction that demonstrates my frustrations with this book. He is talking to someone who is making a career decision that David does not agree with. Even though the person who he is talking to has already said that he has carefully considered the decision, David insists on explaining why its a bad decision and presses him to change his mind. The other person doesn't immediately reply to David's arguments, so David feels happy that his comments had made an impact and that the decision will be changed, but when the other person starts talking, he is actually frustrated that David wasn't listening and that he actually did carefully and prayerfully consider the decision and that this other person will be making that career change. David doesn't consciously accept this other person's decision, so during the rest of the conversation he keeps talking about possible decision or still considering the decision, although it's been made clear to him that the decision has been made.

That kind of blithe arrogance David displayed during that interaction runs through his analysis throughout his book. He is so convinced he is right that while the research has a great deal to say to everyone, his conclusions are filtered through his narrow focus.

As a young Gen-X "outsider", I would fit into his survey research, but I am not the audience for this book. His intended audience is Protestant Christians, and if you are one you may get something out of this. Don't worry, he will not challenge your beliefs; he will go out of his way to reassure you that you have chosen correctly. But he does address issues of presentation during your proselytizing and things to consider during your ministry (because, yes, you still need to minister to me, regardless of how little I want you to).

He discusses the view of Christianity as being antihomosexual. David Kinnaman says the increasingly favorable view that the younger generations have towards homosexuality is due to loyalty to friends who are homosexual. (Other research agrees with him - younger generations are far more likely to have a close friend or relative identify as gay.) He doesn't consider that this loyalty may be born out of a sense of morality, that the younger generations, as products of divorces and broken homes, may see the long-term relationships of their gay relatives and friends and think that to deny them some basic protections is a form of bigotry and/or discrimination. No, because the Bible teaches against homosexuality he doesn't consider that morality could play a part in an opposing view. He considers it simply a matter of loyalty. In fact, he considers it a loyalty born out of immorality by directly comparing the younger generations' loyalty to a gay friend to the illegal downloading of music ("sharing") and stealing from an employee in order to "hook up" a friend with free stuff. To say that's an insulting view is an understatement.

He repeatedly says that most "outsiders" have knowledge of and experience with Christianity, that many attended church as a child and a teenager, but he makes the conclusion that it was Christians being rude and not being open that made them leave. I grant you that I'm sure that's the case in some circumstances, but not in all. He doesn't ever come to the realization that there could be a theological or spiritual reason for someone to leave. David talks about how many people research Christianity, and that half of those researching come away with a great deal of knowledge of Christianity (perhaps "too much", he says), but he follows that with anecdotes of people who didn't really know much about Christianity who wandered into a church and were treated rudely and so left. He references the internet briefly, but talks about its impact causing limited attention. True, but he doesn't talk about the fact that the internet has also eliminated the spiritual monopoly that Christianity has had in most of the US. If the younger generations don't feel comfortable with Christianity, they can now research another spiritual path that speaks to them, whereas 25 years ago they were stuck with either Christianity or nothing.

If you are a Protestant Christian you will probably come away with a notion to not be rude or to be less abrasive, in which case, yay! There should be more nicer and more polite people in the world. But if you come away with the idea that all those young people are "outsiders" simply because Christianity wasn't presented in the proper way or because someone was rude to them, you may be in for an unpleasant shock.

Yes and no is how I respond to this book. Yes, we all have failed to properly represent Christ to a watching world. Yes we have been ungracious, hypocritical, uncharitable, and many other things at times, thereby unnecessarily turning some people off to the gospel.

But no, that is not the whole story. Imagine if one could be free of all these negative traits, and present the good news of God in a totally loving and gracious manner. Would that mean everyone would flock to Christianity?

Well, we don't have to imagine very hard - it has already happened. Jesus came and lived among us, representing God perfectly, full of grace, love and beauty. And guess what? While many people flocked to Christ, many people rejected Christ. The most perfect example of Christlike behaviour was met with mixed results.

That message almost never comes through in this book. It is all about how we fail to measure up in the eyes of non-Christians. Indeed, the book begins with these words: "Christianity has an image problem". Is that it?

It may be part of it, but it surely is not all of it. Jesus said, "If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first" (John 15:18). In one sense, no matter how loving, gracious, tactful and diplomatic we might be, we have no promise that this will result in the successful reception of our message.

In this book six reasons are offered as to why people reject Christianity. The two highest ranking ones were "Antihomosexual" and "Judgmental". Have some believers been un-Christlike and unloving in their dealings with homosexuals? Yes. But again, that is not the end the story. While many of us can and should lift our game here, there is more to it than just that.

At the moment one of the major assaults on faith and family is the militant homosexual lobby. While we need to seek to lovingly reach individual homosexuals with the gospel, we also must deal with the public policy side of things as well.

That is, there is a very real place for standing up for the God-given institution of heterosexual marriage, and resist the demands for same-sex marriage and homosexual adoption rights. And to affirm the Biblical mandate that human sexuality is only permissible within the confines of heterosexual marriage is something we must strongly affirm.

Love and truth must go hand in hand. We can seek to lead all people, including homosexuals, into the kingdom, while taking a stand for biblical truth, which includes the core belief that we are all sinner in need of a saviour.

But to speak the truth about a holy, just and righteous God who demands repentance and a changed life (with the help of Christ) will always cause an image problem, and will always lead many to want nothing to do with biblical Christianity.

I find the chapter on judgmentalism to also be problematic. Consider how the term is defined: "To be judgmental is to point out something that is wrong in someone else's life, making the person feel put down, excluded, and marginalized".

Is that bad? Is it unbiblical? To be honest, it seems to be a perfect description of just what we find in Scripture. Consider the story of Jesus and the rich man as found in Matt. 19:16-30. This seems to portray the very thing that Kinnaman is condemning.

In this pericope Jesus pointed "out something that is wrong in someone else's life" (the rich man), and what was the result? The rich man went away sad we are told, because Jesus was judging his love of riches. That sounds a lot like making the rich man "feel put down, excluded, and marginalized".

The truth is, whenever we proclaim that a person is alienated from God because of his sin and selfishness, and that he needs to repent and ask for forgiveness, that is going to result in such feelings. It cuts right across human pride to point out such things, and the first reaction many will have is, "you are being so judgmental; you are putting me down!"

Sure, by all means let us seek to be as Christlike, as winsome, and as tactful as possible. But rejection, anger or indifference will nonetheless still be the reaction of many.

Perhaps I can tie these two chapters on homosexuality and judging together with a story of a former homosexual who came to Christ. The first half of his story as a homosexual and his dislike of Christianity would have nicely fit in a book like this. But the second half of his story would probably not. His story is entitled: "Thank You For Offending Me". Here is an abbreviated version of his story:

"Let me just say a hearty `THANK YOU' to my wife, and my parents and family, and my friends, who cared enough about me to offend me! I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach when I consider the ramifications in my life had the people in my world bought into the lie that to love me was to affirm my homosexuality...

"I wonder where I would be if my friends had encouraged me to divorce Stephanie and had rallied around me in my homosexuality. I wonder where I would be if my pastors and spiritual shepherds had encouraged me to accept the very thing I needed to lay before the cross of Christ. I shudder at the thought. I know it must have killed them to think of losing me, but they loved me enough to take that risk. THANK YOU, dear friends, for your offense to me. At the time, the Truth you shared was the aroma of death to me (II Cor. 2:15) but today it is the sweet fragrance of LIFE."

His story offers the full picture, the proper biblical balance, which seems to be lacking in this book.