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Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
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Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter explores the secret life of our greatest president, and the untold story that shaped our nation. Visionary filmmakers Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov (director of Wanted) bring a fresh and visceral voice to the bloodthirsty lore of the vampire, imagining lincoln as history's greatest hunter of the undead.
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As it turns out the movie pretty much lives up to the hype. There is an actual plot with characters we can get behind.
Of course some scenes are over the top or just plain silly, but to slay vampires you probably need a good sense of humor. The action is cool and it comes at you fast. When Abe wields his unforgiving axe at Vampire flesh, mayhem ensues. Just make sure to check behind you every once in a while...
I'm sure that's what killed the box office, because the audience having been trained in the Hollywood Gerbil cage were not ready for this break the mold and run free kind of treatment. There is a story. There is lots and lots of action. And the Director certainly understands 3D...but most of all...he has that Russian sense of humor that comes through in every frame (do they still have those???). The whole movie is a kick and I enjoyed myself immensely.
So before you rush back to that Gerbil cage and start the coming Marvel Wheel Of Fortune spinning cash into Hollywood's bottomless craw again take a moment out for this prim and proper, sly and sedate, erstwhile look at our beloved 16th President in a new light.**
**(the views expressed in this review do not reflect per se the opinions or judgment of the author...but rather...per laugh)
Great story, but I would think that the viewer must have some understanding of Civil War history to understand the goings-on with the film.
If you don’t know who Harriet Tubman is and the Underground Railroad, or Jefferson Davis, or Stephen Douglas, you might struggle through this story.
We meet young Mr. Lincoln as a boy, whose mother is killed by a vampire. At his mother’s grave, he resolves to kill the guy, not knowing that he is part of the undead.
Lincoln meets a man who claims to know how to get revenge, teaches him in the ways of whipping around an axe until it goes faster than the eye can follow. Lincoln also learns martial arts moves and runs up walls so he can jump down and swing faster.
Obviously one rolls one’s eyes, since martial arts was basically unknown in American society in the mid-19th century.
Still, it’s fun seeing the vampires get together to create a nation of their own, complete with a 5000 year old vampire who supports the South, so the slaves can be a constant source of blood for them. Yikes!
An ocean of horses, as a vampire runs and jumps from horse to horse, and breaks a few of the animals’ necks as he is chased by Honest Abe. No animals were hurt, since the CGI horses cannot be killed. But wow, so realistic!
The story is even better when we get to Abe stumping for president. When we see the guy before a mighty (CGI) crowd, giving his Emancipation Proclamation (look it up!) it is an amazing thing.
Tim Burton helped produce this one and it shows with the crazy imagery and the horrific attacks by the vampires.
Yes, little Willie Lincoln did die at 11 years, though I’m doubtful it was by a vengeful vampire back from Abe’s youth to wreak havoc on his family.
Yes, the Union had a hard time at Gettysburg, though I doubt it was because of vampires being indestructible to lead bullets, nor that getting silver bullets and silver cannonballs turned the tide of war.
If there was a 5,000 year old vampire who witnessed the Jews being slaves to Egypt, why did it take Adam so dang long to get a following and a nation? You’d think after the first 2000 years he might get bored or something. Oh well.
The film is gory, horrific and a lot of fun. If you’re a Civil War enthusiast, you’ll have a lot more fun pointing out inaccuracies and such or even understanding the puns and humor of the tale.
I enjoyed the special features too, though the meeting of Lincoln and Poe and such were stretching it a bit.