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Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment Hardcover – Ultraviolet, January 27, 2009

4.4 out of 5 stars 3,940 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

As a popular comedian, radio host and red-blooded male, Harvey doesn't have the bona fides typical to most women's relationship self-help, but he still manages a thorough, witty guide to the modern man. Harvey undertakes the tast because "Women are clueless about men," because "Men get away with a whole lot of stuff" and because he has "some valuable information to change all of that." Harvey makes a game effort, taking a bold but familiar men-are-dogs approach: if you're "cutting back" on sex, "he will have another woman lined up and waiting to give him what he needs and wants--the cookie." Several chapters later, however, he introduces the "ninety-day rule," asserting that, actually, he won't always have another woman lined up--and the only way to makes sure is a three-month vetting period. Harvey also tackles mama's boys, "independent--and lonely--women," and the matter of children in the dating world ("If he's meeting the kids after you decide he's the one, it's too late"). Feminists and the easily offended probably won't take to Harvey's blanket statements and blunt advice, but Harvey's fans and those in need of tough (but ticklish) love advice should check it out (especially the hysterical last-chapter Q&A).
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Review

“Harvey’s must-have guide to unlocking the male mind, understanding his game, anticipating his moves and countering with unstoppable offense and defense.” (Los Angeles Sentinel)

“Women should listen to Steve Harvey when it comes to what a good man is about. Steve Harvey dispenses a lot of fabulous information about men. It’s more than the average man will usually tell you. Steve Harvey will give it up.” (Aretha Franklin)

“A thorough, witty guide to the modern man....those in need of tough (but ticklish) love advice should check it out (especially the hysterical last-chapter Q&A).” (Publishers Weekly)

“Filled with practical principles, rules and tips, and illustrated with humorous and warm-hearted anecdotes from Harvey’s life and friendships, ACT LIKE A LADY, THINK LIKE A MAN gives readers the real deal about the differences between the sexes and how to bridge them for a mutually rewarding partnership.” (New York Beacon)

“Harvey offers surprising insights into the male mentality and gives women strategies for taming that unruly beast.” (The Philadelphia Inquirer)
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 232 pages
  • Publisher: Amistad; 1st edition (January 27, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0061728977
  • ISBN-13: 978-0061728976
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.8 x 8.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3,940 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #8,023 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I wanted to read; Act like a Lady Think like a Man out of knowing that Steve Harvey is a wonderful comedian and so much insight comes through looking life from the lighter side. I was not disappointed. I laughed, I learned and my heart opened. He explains that men want to, are trained to and are good at the 3 "P's" when it comes to loving their women. They profess their love; meaning, they tell the world. This is my Lady, my girlfriend, my wife and until they do that know that you are not his. That's the good news...you know where you stand. Second "P": Protect: men will go out of their way to make sure that to the best of their ability the no harm comes to you. No one will talk down to you, nor will they even look like they want to harm you. He takes his job as protector seriously...if not, he's not yours and you are not his. Third "P", a man will Provide for the woman he loves and her/their offspring. He will make sure that all he has goes towards making sure she has what she needs. Even while dating...Ladies, don't rush to pay the check. He feels like a man when he can do this for you whether or not you can do for yourself...maybe even especially if you can do it for yourself. His DNA, according to Harvey and I've seen this in my life a well, providing is his responsibility. If he doesn't feel needed or wanted in any of these 3 "P's" he is not the guy for you nor are you the woman for him. Knowing this, it's easy to move on or to bring a man closer.

I love Harvey's simple and humorous clarity. I wondered if his was a throw back approach and then I realized with his help, women and men are different for a reason. Praise the difference, respect the difference, see the difference...have great relationships. Simple, clear, fun! In conjunction with "Act like a Lady...
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Format: Hardcover
The central premise of Steve Harvey's book is that women are not setting stringent enough standards in their romantic dealings with men. As such, he posits, they are giving away their social power and selling themselves short on their dating/mating goals.

Steve is partially correct, but he misses the central point. It is true that women do tend to settle for less than they truly want when dating, but the damage they're doing to themselves is not ultimately a result of letting men get away with murder, so to speak. Rather, the problem originates from the fact that women are choosing the wrong men. Decent men don't look for any opportunity to take advantage of women. They don't take that mile when given the proverbial inch. The men who do are the players, chiselers and con artists, the kinds of men who may look good in the store window but fall totally apart when you get them home from the mall.

'Act Like a Lady' ultimately is a rehashing of the familiar 'men are incorrigible dogs' theory of gender. It's a tired story that I'd hope we had moved past, but here it is again in a new package. Yes, men like sex. Yes, men like to look around. But decent men are able to control their urges, especially when they know that not doing so will cause great pain to those around them. Steve's theory doesn't stand up to real life, where if you spend any time, you quickly realize that uniqueness is a defining human personality trait.

Most women do have high standards--that is, until they run into a man who knows all the right things to say to circumvent their defenses. A woman can absolutely KNOW that she's worth all the trouble, but she'll totally drop her guard when a skilled player comes along saying all the right things.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I love Steve Harvey - he's hysterically funny and nobody appreciates a naughty sexist joke more than me. This book is pretty much hte same schtick verbatim but without the benefit of his comedic delivery. Maybe it's just me but I don't read him as funny as he delivers it in his show. I read it and the slightly radical feminist in me surfaces.

I was always repulsed by the idea in school, that girls were supposed to bounce around in tiny skirts and freezing cold weather to jump, holler, and cheer for boys just so they could feel important on a regurlar, weekly basis. Not to mention the daily hours of "school" (home ec) devoted to mending football jerseys, (art) making t-shirts to sell for the benefit of the football team (to do whatever it is they do with the benefit of the sales), to (home ec) baking cooking and chili for the teams, etc... and then spend our weekends washing cars and having bake sales in support of the same. And not surprisingly, none of this was ever reciprocated - the football team never donated anything to the ever supportive art or home ec departments. Not that they were ever expected to.

Steve Harvey takes all of this to a new level. Not really a "new" level. But perhaps it's better stated that he's just reinforcing out-dated ideas to a modern society. At one point he actually says that (I'm paraphrasing here because I didn't bother to take notes) "yes women work all day, do more work when they get home - take care of the kids, cook the meals, do the dishes, clean the house but men do stuff too and when they want sex they want it or they're going to stray. And they know you're tired but they're tired too and sex is how they relax.
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