After finishing Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation, I couldn’t wait to recommend it to my family, friends, and others. I truly believe this book is a must-read for anyone with a smartphone, children, or, well, a pulse. Smartphones’ impact has been so fast and pervasive in our culture that we are only beginning to understand how they are changing us.
Because of that, The Anxious Generation is one of the most important nonfiction books I have read this year, perhaps in several years. While many have expressed concern about the impact of mobile phones and social media on our youth, Haidt has made it his mission to uncover the symptoms, explain the effects, and convince us to change how we raise our kids regarding phones and social media.
The insights provided in The Anxious Generation make a compelling case for reevaluating the age at which we give our children phones, the extent of their Internet and social media access, and the value of free play. Haidt argues that smartphones, social media, and helicopter parenting have contributed to a decline in the mental well-being of young people. The book offers practical solutions crucial for fostering the emotional maturity and stability of our children and ourselves.
At the book’s center are four cultural norms Haidt argues we must implement to address the mental health crisis among our youth. These norms serve as a framework for his argument and practical solutions.
First, no smartphones before high school. Parents should delay children’s entry into round-the-clock internet access by giving them only basic phones (phones with limited apps and no internet browser) before ninth grade (roughly 14).
Second, no social media before 16. Let kids get through the most vulnerable period of brain development before connecting them to a constant stream of social comparison and algorithmically chosen influencers, which can significantly impact their self-esteem and mental health.
Next, phone-free schools. All elementary through high school, students should store their phones, smartwatches, and other personal devices to send or receive texts in phone lockers or locked pouches during the school day. This policy is crucial in creating a distraction-free environment that allows students to focus on their studies and social interactions.
And, last, far more unsupervised play and childhood independence. That’s the way children naturally develop social skills, overcome anxiety, and become self-governing young adults.
Some money quotes?
“My central claim in this book is that these two trends—overprotection in the real world and underprotection in the virtual world—are the major reasons why children born after 1995 became the anxious generation.”
“People don’t get depressed when they face threats collectively; they get depressed when they feel isolated, lonely, or useless.”
“The two big mistakes we’ve made: overprotecting children in the real world (where they need to learn from vast amounts of direct experience) and underprotecting them online (where they are particularly vulnerable during puberty).”
“While the reward-seeking parts of the brain mature earlier, the frontal cortex—essential for self-control, delay of gratification, and resistance to temptation—is not up to full capacity until the mid-20s, and preteens are at a particularly vulnerable point in development”
“In this new phone-based childhood, free play, attunement, and local models for social learning are replaced by screen time, asynchronous interaction, and influencers chosen by algorithms. Children are, in a sense, deprived of childhood.”
“We don’t let preteens buy tobacco or alcohol, or enter casinos. The costs of using social media, in particular, are high for adolescents, compared with adults, while the benefits are minimal. Let children grow up on Earth first, before sending them to Mars.”
“Stress wood is a perfect metaphor for children, who also need to experience frequent stressors in order to become strong adults.”
“Children can only learn how to not get hurt in situations where it is possible to get hurt, such as wrestling with a friend, having a pretend sword fight, or negotiating with another child to enjoy a seesaw when a failed negotiation can lead to pain in one’s posterior, as well as embarrassment. When parents, teachers, and coaches get involved, it becomes less free, less playful, and less beneficial. Adults usually can’t stop themselves from directing and protecting.”
“By designing a firehose of addictive content that entered through kids’ eyes and ears, and by displacing physical play and in-person socializing, these companies have rewired childhood and changed human development on an almost unimaginable scale.”
“Gen Z became the first generation in history to go through puberty with a portal in their pockets that called them away from the people nearby and into an alternative universe that was exciting, addictive, unstable, and—as I will show—unsuitable for children and adolescents.”
“Over the course of many decades, we found ways to protect children while mostly allowing adults to do what they want. Then quite suddenly, we created a virtual world where adults could indulge any momentary whim, but children were left nearly defenseless. As evidence mounts that phone-based childhood is making our children mentally unhealthy, socially isolated, and deeply unhappy, are we okay with that trade-off? Or will we eventually realize, as we did in the 20th century, that we sometimes need to protect children from harm even when it inconveniences adults?”
“We are embodied creatures; children should learn how to manage their bodies in the physical world before they start spending large amounts of time in the virtual world.”
“One way that companies get more users is by failing to enforce their own rules prohibiting users under 13. In August 2019, I had a video call with Mark Zuckerberg, who, to his credit, was reaching out to a wide variety of people, including critics. I told him that when my children started middle school, they each said that most of the kids in their class (who were 10 or 11 at the start of sixth grade) had Instagram accounts. I asked Zuckerberg what he planned to do about that. He said, “But we don’t allow anyone under 13 to open an account.” I told him that before our call I had created a fake account for a fictional 13-year-old girl and I encountered no attempt to verify my age claim. He said, “We’re working on that.” While writing this chapter (in August 2023), I effortlessly created another fake account. There is still no age verification, even though age verification techniques have gotten much better in the last four years nor is there any disincentive for preteens to lie about their age.”
“Our kids can do so much more than we let them. Our culture of fear has kept this truth from us. They are like racehorses stuck in the stable.”
“Many of the best adventures are going to happen with other children in free play.
“And when that play includes kids of mixed ages, the learning is deepened because children learn best by trying something that is just a little beyond their current abilities— in other words, something a slightly older kid is doing. Older kids can also benefit from interacting with younger kids, taking on the role of a teacher or older sibling. So, the best thing you can do for your young children is to give them plenty of playtime, with some age diversity, and a secure loving base from which they set off to play.
“As for your own interactions with your child, they don’t have to be “optimized.” You don’t have to make every second special or educational.
“It’s a relationship, not a class. But what you do often matters far more than what you say, so watch your own phone habits. Be a good role model who is not giving continuous partial attention to both the phone and the child.”
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My central claim in this book is that these two trends—overprotection in the real world and underprotection in the virtual world—are the major reasons why children born after 1995 became the anxious generation.Highlighted by 6,927 Kindle readers- People don’t get depressed when they face threats collectively; they get depressed when they feel isolated, lonely, or useless.Highlighted by 5,167 Kindle readers
- While the reward-seeking parts of the brain mature earlier, the frontal cortex—essential for self-control, delay of gratification, and resistance to temptation—is not up to full capacity until the mid-20s, and preteens are at a particularly vulnerable point in development.Highlighted by 4,048 Kindle readers
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Technology and Play Affect Children
Haidt, J. (2024). The anxious generation: How the great rewiring of childhood is causing an epidemic of mental illness. Penguin Press.Jonathan Haidt is a social psychologist at New York University’s Stern School of Business. He received his Ph.D. from the University of Pennsylvania in 1992.The Great Rewiring is a phenomenon Haidt attributes to the first generation (Gen Z) to likely grow up with a smartphone combined with parenting shifts toward "overprotecting children and restricting their autonomy in the real world." Haidt asserted, "By designing a firehose of addictive content. . . . and by displacing physical play and in-person socializing," social media "rewired childhood and changed human development on an almost unimaginable scale." The amount of time children spend on their phone contributes to social deprivation, sleep deprivation, attention fragmentation, and addiction. Haidt presents arguments supported by research for why girls' and boys' anxieties are increasing, and mental health is decreasing. Research shows that girls' social lives moved toward social media while boys immersed themselves in video games and hardcore pornography. Haidt found, "social media harms girls more than boys. . . boys are at greater risk than girls for 'failure to launch'." Research also shows that "social media use is a cause, not just a correlate of anxiety and depression." The book's four parts walks the reader through Haidt's arguments: statistics about children's mental health, decline of the play-based childhood and repercussions, the rise of the phone-based childhood including how it affects girls and boys differently, and practical suggestions for government, school, and parental collective action.My brothers and I grew up able to run around the neighborhood and play. It wasn't that we ran amok (ha ha) but I don't recall a great deal of oversight or rules about our play and exploration of the neighborhood. This idea of parenting shifts in response to stranger danger type threats wherein children retreated indoors with a higher level of parental supervision is something new for me. Something I read before but really sunk in with Haidt's presentation was how the reduction of play occurred around the same time that children were exposed to the Internet and then cell phone technology. A retreat inside meant the use of technology to garner children's attention and eventually access to smart phones with free, 24/7 accessibility including unlimited access to social media. Parents and teachers should read this book. It's not an easy read, rather sobering in its effect but Haidt offers strategies suggestive of ways forward. This book would also be good for those interested in technology and human development, mental health, gender studies, and public policies.
Top reviews from the United States
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- Reviewed in the United States on July 4, 2024
- Reviewed in the United States on December 12, 2024
- Reviewed in the United States on March 31, 2024
I absolutely love Jonathan Haidt and pre-ordered this book because I couldn't wait to read and devour like I did the Coddling.
The research is spot on, the message is critically important (though I would say, I don't know that this message is limited to teens. I think Cal Newport's Digital Minimalism book is in order for adults too. The 24 hr news cycle is making us anxious too!) I digress. I love what he has to say about raising children and I have implemented a lot of these ideas with my four children already (disclaimer: Safety Minimalism gets the cops called on you for just letting your children play outside - at least near the suburbs of NYC where I live - but the confidence is a worthy trade off).
The only problem is evolution can't support these claims or sustain them. Evolution is a western-centric limited worldview that can only be described as a process of chaos and chance that has no particular purpose or meaning guiding it. In one of the photos of my review I addressed this when Haidt refers to hunter-gatherers to explain how important play is. The issue is that if evolution is "guiding" us, we can just evolve and adjust again to respond to the deathly threat of the digital revolution. There is no objective, absolute standard that says we must go back to our primitive ways, in fact- for whatever reason "evolution" got rid of play-based childhood and going back could be considered retrograde. Unless people were made with some purpose and design, we have no reason to go on this mission to save childhood. It will be selected out just like all other traits (how do we assume in evolution which traits are the good and which are the bad btw?). Evolution is a worldview that brings about change through death. We can't put all the digital issues of the age back in the box unless we are bold enough to claim that there is an objective standard of truth and morality.
Chapter 8 offers a view that some level of spirituality can "save us." I agree in a sense, but it can't be empty and made up or promulgated as an opiate of the people. God is not to be taken so lightly as our bandaid cure. We can have all of the excellent ideas of this book, without using the made up excuse that we are just mechanical processes to suppress the truth that we were created and designed by God to be saved from our sins only through Jesus' payment for them in his death and the promise of His resurrection. Lots of the world believes this, which is why I say evolution is very western hegemonic and atheistic in its nature to give us a good excuse to getting out of accountability from God.
All that said, I still really love this book and think it is very urgent and should be extended to all adults. But if we really are an unguided, mechanistic bunch of atoms bumping into one another, it really doesn't matter at all that the kids are not alright. They'll adjust. They'll "evolve." God help us.
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- Reviewed in the United States on December 15, 2024
Top reviews from other countries
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M. A. MusReviewed in Mexico on August 22, 2024
Excelente libro con información documentada de las consecuencias del smartphone y las redes
- Gordon R.Reviewed in Canada on August 8, 2024
The vast majority of this book’s points are critical.
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Amazon CustomerReviewed in Brazil on June 7, 2024
Fundamental para evoluirmos nessa discussão
- Zak HoulahanReviewed in the United Kingdom on November 9, 2024
A must read and very much for parents with younger kids
