The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt Hardcover – September 12, 2017
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"People are jerks. And there’s plenty of evidence to prove it in the very blunt self-help book called “The A—hole Survival Guide,” a scholarly source that teaches fed-up readers how to deal with co-workers, strangers and just about anyone who sucks." —Moneyish"Sutton offers a variety of techniques that people suffering the presence of difficult individuals at their work, in their sports teams or just in everyday life can employ to deal with them or fight back. . . This is a small book but it could play a big part in making us treat others better." —Forbes
"If everyone had paid attention to the Stanford business professor's best-selling 2007 management manifesto, "The No Asshole Rule," there would be no need for a follow-up. Yet here we are." —Esquire
The crowded genre of workplace bullying books features clever titles...the best of the authors in the category is Stanford Professor Robert Sutton, who published The No Asshole Rule a decade ago and returns now with a more fully developed plan of action." —The National Book Review
"Sutton’s breezy writing style, combined with the wide array of anecdotes and stories from people who’ve written him about their difficulties, makes for an entertaining read...consider that the physical book itself might be a solution to an a-hole at work. Much like the effect Sutton’s first book reportedly has had, simply leaving The Asshole Survival Guide prominently on your desk may send all the signal you need." —SmartUp
“In this most-welcome sequel to Sutton’s bestselling The No Asshole Rule, the author turns from an organization-wide perspective to an individual one, outlining strategies for dealing with difficult people at work.” —Publishers Weekly
“Bob Sutton is very wise and very funny, AND he can tell you exactly how to handle the unfortunate reality that into every life a few assholes must fall. THE ASSHOLE SURVIVAL GUIDE is destined to become your go-to resource whenever you find yourself dealing with people who would treat you poorly.” —Susan Cain, New York Times bestselling author of QUIET
“At last someone has provided clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives. Better still, that someone is the great Bob Sutton, which ensures that the information is useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.” —Robert Cialdini, author of New York Times bestsellers INFLUENCE and PRE-SUASION
“No matter what industry or profession you work in, you will always encounter people who are unpleasant, off-putting, or downright self-centered. Thank goodness Bob Sutton has provided us with such a well-crafted guide for surviving these jerks. It is mandatory reading for anyone who strives to endure, escape, fend-off, and bring them down.” —Chip Conley, founder and past CEO of Joie de Vivre hotels, advisor and former Head of Global Hospitality and Strategy at Airbnb, author of four books including the New York Times best seller Emotional Equations.
“With humor, understanding and comprehensive research – and an ah-ha moment on every page – this is a must-have for leaders and climbing stars alike, from the expert on the subject. Bravo!” —Marshall Goldsmith, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller TRIGGERS
“This is the guide you need for handling the worst people in your life—and making sure they don’t rub off on you. If you’ve ever had a horrible boss, client, or colleague, this book is bursting with advice that’s often ingenious and always actionable. And if your world has been free of jerks, consider this an insurance policy.” —Adam Grant, New York Times bestselling author of GIVE AND TAKE and ORIGINALS, and coauthor of OPTION B
“Assholes are like the weather—everybody complains about them but nobody ever does anything about them. Until, that is, Robert Sutton’s Asshole Survival Guide. Sutton offers a wealth of helpful, and dare I say wise suggestions about how to identify and deal with the assholes in your organization, or at least minimize the damage they do to the well-being and productivity of others. (I’d also suggest bringing it along to family reunions and PTA meetings.)” —Geoff Nunberg, University of California at Berkeley, author of Ascent of the A-Word: Assholism, the First Sixty Years.
"One of the biggest impediments to achieving a great workplace is assholes. Their behavior creates a hostile work environment that leads to decreased engagement, productivity and employee loyalty. Bob Sutton has written a fantastic book that explains the severity of the problem and provides useful strategies for dealing with it.” —Paul Purcell, Chairman and former long-time CEO of Baird, ranked fourth on Fortune’s Top 100 Companies to Work For and renowned for its long-time “no assholes” policy.
"Reading the Asshole Survival Guide made me wistful. If only Bob Sutton's book had been available to help me deal with the full complement of 1st-class assholes I've encountered in my 50-year professional life. No names shall be mentioned." —Tom Peters, co-author of the bestseller IN SEARCH OF EXCELLENCE
"First, The No Asshole Rule alerted us to the problem. Now, The Asshole Survival Guide offers the solution. This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to reducing our exposure and protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to dispirit and demean. Now more than ever, with civility and decency under attack, we desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.” —Daniel H. Pink, bestselling author of To Sell is Human and Drive
"As much as we try to avoid assholes, inevitably they appear in our lives. Bob Sutton gives us a menu of clear, thoughtful, and practical solutions for surviving and thriving in those painful situations. With cutting-edge research and real-life examples that are thought-provoking and often hilarious, The Asshole Survival Guide is an indispensable resource.” —Gretchen Rubin, bestselling author of THE HAPPINESS PROJECT and BETTER THAN BEFORE
"It's hard to know how to react to a jerk, so The Asshole Survival Guide is a Godsend. Obnoxious behavior is a double whammy. First, you feel mad at the other person. Next, you feel mad at yourself for your response / lack of response. It's being mad at yourself that is both hard to be aware of, and is most debilitating. With this brilliant and funny book, Bob Sutton saves you from fear, loathing, and self-loathing!" —Kim Scott, bestselling author of the New York Times bestseller, Radical Candor, cofounder of Candor, Inc, former executive at Google and Apple
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I was hoping for something to add more to my repertoire of conflict resolution with tough bosses and office trouble makers. I was disappointed.
It's full of exhaustive anecdotes that you might read via clicking through a Facebook advertisement, but there really isn't much in the book about addressing the problem (difficult people in the workplace). The major theme was avoidance and delusion, with nothing to encourage a person to understand the problem, "digging it out by the roots". The book just felt like pity party ("Poor you, you work with a bunch of jerks! That's just awful.") and wasn't constructive. I can't recommend it.
FORTUNATELY, the disappointment this book left me with inspired me to dig deeper into understanding others and I've since dedicated myself to reading a couple of other human behavior books:
What Every Body is Saying, by Joe Navarro
and Emotional Intelligence, by Daniel Goleman
These two books are comprehensive, scientific, and provide you with knowledge to decode and understand the human beings in your life, and from there you can be proactive about creating a more harmonious environment for yourself and others.
If you just feel bad and want to keep feeling bad, I guess this book is OK. If you want to do something about your lot in life, skip this.
I liked Sutton’s observation that just distancing yourself from an A, even by 10 or 20 feet, can help reduce the toxicity of the atmosphere surrounding As. Becoming an A can be contagious. You don’t have to read the book cover to cover in one sitting, and there are times you’ll find it a great reference tool Be careful about making the book highly visible in your workspace. You don’t know when an A will wander by. Some thoughts not in the book but still important – (1) If in a meeting, you don’t recognize the A in the room, you may be the A. (2) Some music to hum if you need to tune out an A, from Willie Nelson – “Momma don’t let your babies grow up to be As…”
Yes, the are a--holes out there. Either live with it or leave. You can't fix it. YOU have to change. YOU have to adapt.
Sadly, too few managers followed Sutton’s entirely sensible, research-based advice – maybe because most readers of the book were the employees who suffered daily the slings and arrows of the jerks around them. Fortunately for all of us, those readers have inundated Sutton ever since with pleas for help, filling his inbox and bending his ear with thousands of juicy tales from the front lines of asshole-land – the land where motivation droops, productivity stalls, creativity fizzles, and despair reigns.
At last, Sutton has created what these readers begged for: a compelling account of the best of these tales, across a stunning variety of work and personal situations, along with research-based and experience-tested methods for identifying, avoiding, neutralizing, or – if all else fails – escaping the mushroom cloud of negativity with which jerks befoul the world around them. We all owe a debt of gratitude for this important work to Bob Sutton – a nice person who, alas, will forever be known as The Asshole Guy.
- Teresa Amabile, Professor at Harvard Business School & Coauthor of The Progress Principle
Top international reviews
The book explains practical ways to detect, avoid and confront difficult people. There are chapters dedicated to each topic like detection, avoidance, and confrontation. After describing each of these techniques in detail, Bob Sutton summarizes these techniques into a list. When dealing with such people and situations, we just have to go back to this list. At the onset of the book, Bob Sutton establish the most important ground rule. Sometimes, we might be the problem while we are ignorant about we being the issue. We might think everyone else around as difficult, but it might be us who are difficult to everyone around us. So Bob Sutton suggest the following rule. Be quick to label yourself as the difficult person and be slow in labeling others.
With this in mind, I recommend you to read this book. After all, the workplace is where we spend most of our time. So it is essential to have healthy if not happy environment there. This book helps in building such a place. There are enough anecdotes and studies scattered in the book which you will be able to relate.
For less experienced people starting out in the workforce, this book would be invaluable.
Good clever tips for working environment's
Something I think every manager and business owner should read.
So they don't employ toxic staff to there environment