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Back Off: How to Confront and Stop Sexual Harassment and Harassers Paperback – July 1, 1993
"Neverworld Wake" by Marisha Pessl
Read the absorbing new psychological suspense thriller from acclaimed New York Times bestselling author Marisha Pessl. Learn more
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From the Back Cover
Back Off! is filled with real-life success stories from women who have stopped harassers cold: Sharon, who succeeded in stopping a whole crew of habitual harassers in a city park...; Stephanie, a ten-year-old who confronted and escaped a child molester...; Catharine and Molly, who stood up to their landlord and stopped him from harassing the tenants...; and dozens more. From an eight-year-old who successfully challenged two young harassers on the playground to an organized group of fifty women who confronted a dockworker in response to an attempted rape on the job, here's what they did, how they did it - and how you can do it, too. Back Off! is the first book to focus on the direct-action tactics that work and the first to deal with harassment everywhere it takes place, in both blue-collar and white-collar jobs, at school, on the street, on the bus or subway, in the park, even in church. Back Off! examines the dynamics of sex and power in sexual harassment, the motives behind harassers' actions, and why traditional responses such as appeasement or aggression don't work, and describes the successful resistance strategies that you really can use - including nonviolent personal confrontation techniques, group confrontations, administrative remedies, and formal lawsuits.
Top customer reviews
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I have been trying to contact the author so I can personally thank her for her work. That's how much this book has moved, inspired and informed me, as we all move forward to eliminate sexual harassment.
I truly wish I could give this book ten stars.
The book was shipped super fast. I would recommend it to any one. And if
anyone was able to take the classes offered by the author I recommend the class 100%.
No one should be sexually harassed ever.
Lots of helpful advice for social incursions, workplace harassment, racial aspects of sexual harassment, different scenarios. I'd taken the self-defense course known variously as Impact! or Model Mugging and that's all about life-threatening physical assault. But, even after I learned to knock out an attacker, I still had no tools to deal with softer intrusions, such as being stalked at a party where I was reluctant to make a scene among friends. This book will help you recognize when harassment is occurring and give you fresh ways to deal with it, ways you won't find on TV or most news sites.
Another aspect I liked about the book was her advice: label the behavior, not the person. Don't make it overly personal. Saying to someone, "You told a lie" is very, very different from saying, "You're a liar!" or even "You lied to me!". Keeping it factual forces people to take responsibility for their actions without becoming so identified with them that they can't change.
A successful confrontation with a harasser, IMO, is one where the harasser admits wrongdoing, quits doing it, and thus re-enters the world of human decency. Just punishing harassers doesn't really fix anything long-term.
She is a small woman, about 5'2" and appears not at all aggressive, so she can relate to just about all of us. And she knows what she's talking about!
Yes, it's confrontational, but because that is how you deal with sexual harrassment. You cannot be vague in your request to a harrasser to stop. You must be clear, in control and direct when you confront, or you will not be taken seriously. And that is what I got from her book and her class.
This book has given me great insight on how to deal with different situations that we, as women, face every day. And from each story, you see how effective the power of your words are. I was actually quite shocked to see how effective it really was.