- Publisher: Balcony Publishing; First Printing edition (December 1988)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0929488024
- ISBN-13: 978-0929488028
- Product Dimensions: 7.6 x 5.2 x 0.2 inches
- Shipping Weight: 4 ounces
- Average Customer Review: 103 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #309,103 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Balcony People Paperback – December, 1988
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About the Author
Joyce Landorf Heatherley, nationally known author, public speaker, and recording artist brings the special message of love and hope to thousands of men and women through her books, videos, music, and inspired presentations.
A graduate of Pasadena City College with a degree in music, Joyce also received an honorary doctorate in humanities from Azusa Pacific University. Through her 24 books, her film series (His Stubborn Love), speaking engagements, radio programs and national television appearances, Joyce has spread her inspired message of hope to millions of readers and viewers both in the U.S. and overseas. Her four record albums exemplify her musical gift and touch the hearts of people needing reassurance, hope and support in the trials of everyday living. There are over seven million copies of her products in circulation.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Linda's scissors were making their usual precisionlike snipping noises around my head. "Where are you going this time?" she asked.
"Ah, Dallas." Linda's marvelous smile flashed at my reflection in the mirror. I knew she was remembering the last time she'd been in Dallas. Linda had done my hair and makeup during the filming of my His Stubborn Love film series. Since she had never attended one of my seminars or speaking engagements, or any other Christian event for that matter, the "Dallas experience" had been anything but what she had expected! God's timing was perfect that day. And the Lord used the filming to touch Linda's life on the deepest level possible. She's not been the same since.
"Are you speaking at the same place?"
"No, this is for the International Convention of Christian Booksellers. I'm the speaker for the Thursday night banquet at the close of the convention.
Linda continued cutting my hair. Then, after a few more minutes, she asked, "What are you gonna talk about?"
"The gift of affirmation."
Linda's scissors stopped abruptly. She looked at me in the mirror again, tilted her head to the side, and said with a straight face, "That's great! What's affirmation?"
Good question, I thought. There's so little affirmation in the world today we hardly know the word, much less understand the concept.
"Let's see." I tried to sound brilliant. "Affirmation is one person affirming another."
Linda's blank look went from "You're kidding" to "Okay, I give up."
I began again. "Actually, Linda, affirmation happens when I come into your shop to have my hair done, and, since I know you are going to work a miracle on my hair, I verbalize my appreciation and gratitude. I affirm you when I say, 'Linda, you're incredible! I bring you my oily, straggly bunch of fine, reluctant-to-be-tamed hair, and you work your brand of magic on me! I leave your shop clean, combed, and almost gorgeous.' My words affirm and assure you of my love for you as a person, my confidence in you as a professional hairdresser, and my belief in you as a person of value."
She looked at me for a second, snapped the hair dyer on, and smiling with comprehension said, "I like it!"
And I thought to myself, Don't we all?
We like it when those we know and love communicate their admiration for us by making positive comments about us based on their respect, and we like it when they verbalize their love for us. (Personally, I love it!)
This book is about the lethal poison of rejection, and the healing antidote of affirmation.
Affirming someone because we respect their human worth and personal dignity is a rare and lovely thing. But affirming someone because of the bond of God's love between us is a downright marvelous experience!...
I can turn on the radio and feel "loved" by Neil Diamond's love song "Hello, Again, Hello," but there is no genuine affirmation. Godly affirmation is based not on what we are, or what we've accomplished, but just on the fact that we are who we are. For instance, there is an incredible bonding which happens almost instantaneously when a doctor puts a newborn infant, still wet from the birth canal, upon the mother's bare breast. The mother affirms her baby not for what the infant has accomplished but simply because the baby is... I have about concluded that there are only two basic types of people in the world: the evaluators and the affirmers.
I am sure, if there were a way to view a movie and see instant replays of all the strategic change points in our lives, that we'd instantly spot the people who either broke our spirits by their critical of judgmental evaluations, or who healed us by their loving, perceptive affirmations...
We are have the choice to replay the harmful remarks from evaluators, or we can choose to let them pass on. We can even choose to make allowances for their discouraging, destructive words. But best of all is the choice to willingly focus our minds and hearts on today's person who is affirming us.
Let me ask you. Who is the affirmer in your life, who by one small sentence or more, has changed and lifted your opinion of yourself? Who was the person early in your life who recognized the first sparks of originality in the labyrinths of your mind and soul, and saw what no one else saw? And who is the special affirmer who catches quick glimpses of the flames from the fires of your potential and tells you so? Who, by his or her words, helps you to respect and believe in your own value as a person? And who is the affirmer who encourages you to stretch and dream beyond your self-imposed limits and capabilities?
Whoever these people may be, I know their name, for they are called Affirmers, with a capital A. I have known only a few genuine affirmers, but one affirmer is worth a thousand evaluators.
Top customer reviews
Husbands may knowingly and/or unknowingly inflict tremendous emotional damage on loved ones by what they say or do while maintaining an attitude of "grow up", "get over it", or "that's just part of life". A real man must try to be sensitive to others feelings and not say (or fail to say) things that may be carried for a lifetime. But, when we have hurt others, especially loved ones, then what do we do. If you have ever felt that way, this book is for you; if you have not ever felt this way, you probably need it more than the rest of us. Great resource for human relations, especially for (all) family members to read.
Most recent customer reviews
It was received in very good condition and on time - thank you