- Paperback: 288 pages
- Publisher: University of Georgia Press; New Ed edition (September 2, 1999)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0820321753
- ISBN-13: 978-0820321752
- Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.7 x 8.5 inches
- Shipping Weight: 15.5 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 49 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #242,805 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Because I Remember Terror, Father, I Remember You Paperback – September 2, 1999
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With great courage and startling compassion, Silverman tells [her] story. . . . Harrowing in its depiction of savage violation and profoundly moving in its portrait of a child's fear, confusion, and desperate search for a safe place.(Kirkus Reviews)
This harrowing memoir gives voice to the inarticulate terror Silverman suffered as a child, when she could never find the right words to describe her situation. She has found them now.(Booklist)
Readers of Silverman's wrenching memoir . . . are in for a rough emotional ride, but it is well worth it.(Ms. Magazine)
Silverman's lyric style transforms a ravaged childhood into a work of art. The book reads like a poem.(St. Petersburg Times)
Living, empowering proof that an orchid can bloom right up through concrete. A remarkable achievement from a remarkable woman who forces us to look for a word beyond 'survivor.'(Andrew Vachss author of Haiku)
Silverman has a brave, piercing intelligence which transcends psychological explanations and does not require symbolism to convey a sense of what she went through. . . . She has learned exquisitely how to look at what she could not face and how to speak through those silences.(Fourth Genre)
Searing, brave, powerfully-written . . . Sue Silverman's memoir is about more than incest; it is about evil, about denial, about the great chasm between the public facade of a prominent, successful family and its painful reality, and it is about how, as in a Greek tragedy, a curse has been passed down through several generations. This book is the cry that shatters the curse.(Adam Hochschild author of Half the Way Home: A Memoir of Father and Son)
Nothing less than a bolt of electricity to the hopeful part of us that believes every portrait of a happy family that we see. . . . A terrifying and heartening book . . . I know it's going to be passed urgently from hand to hand.(Rosellen Brown author of Before and After)
About the Author
Sue William Silverman is a professional speaker on child abuse and addiction. Her other books are "Love Sick: One Woman s Journey through Sexual Addiction"; "The Pat Boone Fan Club: My Life as a White Anglo-Saxon Jew"; and "Fearless Confessions: A Writer s Guide to Memoir." She teaches at Vermont College of Fine Arts."
Top customer reviews
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The author's mother grew up during the Great Depression and she knew what it was like to go to bed hungry on many nights. This seems to have been the defining period of her life and the fear of ever losing financial security prevented her from protecting her daughter.
This family took the term 'dysfunctional' to unimaginable heights.
Randy, Sue Silverman's psychiatrist, feels both parents caused the child abuse.
It's also the story of a stolen and lost childhood. This type of severe child abuse forces a person to grow up too fast.
Child sexual abuse of this magnitude causes very complex and dangerous psychological effects on the victim for many years and into adulthood. Sue became what's called a sexual addict where the person confuses intimacy with sexual gratification.
It caused Sue's mind to sort of split into multiple personalities. She spent many years trying to find a girl she once saw sitting on the beach. Eventually she realized that was her inner child.
In her book Love Sick: One Woman's Journey through Sexual Addiction Sue goes into the details of those psychological issues.
The book goes back and forth between Sue's sexual misadventures with her father and episodes and experiences in her own life like in school, relationships, and when she became an adult and left home.
Sue's father said something very strange to her when he was in the hospital and near death. First he said him and Sue's mother should never have gotten married because they were 'like glass and water'. Then he said:
"You and I are exactly alike."
Who will ever know what that statement means if anything.
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The Twilight Zone: The Complete Definitive Collection
I suffered abuse in my childhood and I started writing my memoir last year. After reading this book, I decided to change how my book begins. Ms. Silverman's prose taught me how to write better and with more depth.
This memoir covered many aspects of healing, especially that it is a journey which takes a lifetime. Like me, Ms. Silverman found that it took seeing more than one therapist to find the right fit and get the most benefit.
At times this memoir was difficult to read due the graphic details. Overwhelmed by the intense and visual descriptions, I set it aside many times to take a breather. The author's prose drew me into her world.
The memoir read like a novel.
Thank you Sue Silverman for giving me, and the world this autobigraphy. You give me strength and hope.
Serena D. Brown