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The Big Rusty Lie Paperback – January 19, 2009
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The Amazon Book Review
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From the Back Cover
Bernardo Walterhaus is a detective on a mission: find a missing heiress that no one else can seem to locate. But this is no ordinary detective. Bernardo Walterhaus is the self-proclaimed "world's greatest detective," on the run from forced imprisonment in the Lombardo Institue For The Mentally Sub-Standard and yearning to save the day. The Mayor of Oberwalz is trying to put him back in the Institute (and wants him dead), his ex-partner hates his guts (and wants him dead), there are mercenaries following him (who want him dead), and he's hours behind everyone else on the case. But that won't stop Bernardo Walterhaus.
Armed with cunning wit, tremendous luck, and an unerring ability to find himself in trouble, Bernardo will solve the case with the help of his driver and bodyguard, Ching Dic-Tofon, his favorite cab driver, "Sugah" Brown, and a pack of "Oberwalz's finest," the most vulgar and violent cops you could ever hope to have on your side.
Bernardo will find an unlikely solution, without a clue or a good idea, as long as the mercenaries, gnomes, orderlies, exploding castles, fake Germans, angry competitors, plane crashes, burning office buildings, board meetings, boiling chocolate, fratboys, and criminal masterminds don't get him first.
Top customer reviews
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I can't recommend this book to you without one qualification.
You must put down your empty life and read this book. Don't delude yourself into thinking that anything else will compare to what you will find here. I found myself repeatedly laughing out loud on public transit, scaring the other riders.
Perhaps an analogy is appropriate to illustrate the illicit pleasure you will enjoy.
Life in Oberwalz is like pie--a tasty fruit pie with a perfectly golden crust that was spontaneously but masterfully pierced to relieve the pressure of steam and allow one to observe the boil of syrup.
Now, some overlook the importance of pectin. Pectin is what holds a pie's juicy contents together and keeps them from running across the void of the first slice in a flood of disappointment.
You might say that Ryan Speck is pectin. He binds what could be an overly ambitious baking tragedy into a thoroughly enjoyable masterpiece that won't ooze all over your plate.
Afterwards, you might decide to have a cup of coffee to round off the experience. You will smile contentedly. As you digest, you will realize you crave more.
You will return to the kitchen, balancing your fork on the plate in a clumsy but determined ballet. When you get to the pie tin, your heart will sink because there is no more pie.
But don't be upset. There's another one in the oven.
I LIKED IT.
Serious! It aint bad. Some parts Douglas Adams. Other parts Phyllis Diller. But all parts pectin (as described below).
Buy the heck out of it.
I cannot recommend this book enough, especially since much of what I read tries to appease certain standards too much. Speck certainly provides an incredibly entertaining story that will leave you hungry for more; but he does it on his terms. And trust me, you wouldn't want it any other way.