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Alex (Rich George) is suffering from a mysterious and incurable disease that is turning him into a worm-infested ghoul. His wife, Kristen (Darya Zabinski), solicits the help of Alex's friend Thomas (Brian Paulin) to help find a cure. Thomas works in a morgue and decides to utilize the bones of the dead as an alternative medicine. The unusual medication works and Alex begins to make a recovery. The dead, however, don't like having their bones abused and they rise from their graves to reclaim their missing parts and exact revenge upon the living. Watching Bone Sickness is like reading a love letter to all the great and ghastly zombie films of yore. On par with any of Fulci's finest, director Brian Paulin pulls off a memorable feat - delivering a splatterfest with absolutely no compromise and as unapologetically as possible. Awarded 5 out of 5 Mugs O'Blood by The Horror Channel's Uncle Creepy, this balls-to-the-wall, splatterrific tale of doom will satisfy the needs of all horror aficionados. We dare you to watch the whole movie.
If you are a zombie fan, if you are a Fulci/Romero/Carpenter fan, if you love gore, if you love independent film, if you love a great set of breasts then you need to get this film. --Dread Central
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pros: 1) not a bad concept, really. you've got the illness-coping aspect on the part of Alex and his girlfriend a la "I, Zombie", the friend with access to corpses and the ability to experiment on them a la Herbert West (much of the background music sounds identical to scenes from Re-Animator), and vengeful zombies; which all sounds pretty cool. 2) some of the shots taken - namely the stills - work effectively to set tones. 3) good mix of gross-out (kudos to the dude that played Alex!) and gore sequences, the latter of which was largely well done and realistic. this is surely where the entire budget for the movie went, however, as we explore...
cons: 1) the props, costumes, set pieces etc. appear to have been bought in the dollar bin at walgreens. 2) truly atrocious acting, but not even the endearing kind. that one detective wasn't horrible, but man, the rest of it was painful. no one appeared to care whatsoever if/when/that they were on screen. 2) obnoxious amounts of female nudity. it made the movie drag, and there's just nothing erotic about a boob or two simply being exposed. sorry, bro, i'm not an 8 year old. 3) last, but not least: the editing. holy mother of god, the editing. all of it. completely destroyed any potential for professionalism.
i applaud the people involved with this one for their efforts, but their execution fell short by my standards. if this was an entry to a high school film contest that had a one week deadline, then i'd understand, but...come on, now.
As with much of indie horror, the writer/director is a special effects guy like Timo Rose & Olaf Ittenbach over in Germany. Creepy, resourceful and inventive, "Bone Sickness" is a celebration of horror and indie film fire. If you can accept (or embrace) its DIY flaws, it smolders and shambles like Fulci in a Manhole with perhaps some hints of bizarro literature and Tetsuo: Iron Man oddity. Seek out and enjoy. (And Brian Paulin's Fetus is even better.)
I should preface this review by stating that I really enjoy movies with little or no budget, such as this one, if they are done with some intent to be a reasonable attempt to portray the writers vision. This movie was disappointing even considering the limitations under which it was created.
So, down to brass tacks. The acting is understandably horrible, but its the role that the director himself plays which really kills this whole movie. Something about his perfectly coiffured red mullet, which remains perfect until the imminent blood spray at the end and his "yeah, I cut up corpses and give you the meat" attitude while he fixed his perfect Kentucky waterfall.
Which brings me to another point- This movie is highly confusing. A simple splatter flick would have been much easier to watch than all the rhetoric about necromancy and feeding human remains back to an infected person - who is also so underdeveloped to the point that you just wish he would have died in the first five minutes anyway.
The gore is mostly watery blood, plastic skeletons and Halloween props, meal-worms, some pet scorpions (which had no relevant point or scare factor), and buckets of earthworms which actors constantly spit out of their mouths for some unknown reason... Constantly chewing and spitting earthworms on the floor isn't really gore. The three nude scenes hardly justify sitting through the rest of the movie you would have to endure.
Somehow amongst this less-than-mediocre attempt at a movie there is a car crash where a Buick flips over and explodes. Apparently this is where all the money and effort were wasted in the making of this film.
It ends with a long credit list, mostly consisting of the director's 50 different roles in this movie, and a video recap of all the people you never cared about in the movie to begin with, and an advertisement to buy the album of the death-metal band playing throughout the credits.
Worst I've ever seen... and that's pretty pathetic.
The best part is the nudity, of course featuring full frontal of porn star Ruby Larocca.
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