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Chivalry and Courtesy: Medieval Manners for a Modern World Hardcover – October 24, 2023
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A surprising look at how medieval etiquette can improve our lives today, from the author of the popular How to Live Like a Monk
Medieval people are often portrayed as having poor hygiene and table manners―licking their knives or throwing chicken bones on the floor. In the Middle Ages, however, such behavior was not tolerated. Medieval society cherished order in nearly every facet of life, from regular handwashing to daily prayer. There were consequences if you didn’t adhere to the rules of good behavior: you wouldn’t be invited to the lord’s next dinner, you wouldn’t win the battle, and you wouldn’t win the lady.Author Daniele Cybulskie explores the world of medieval etiquette, encompassing table manners and interpersonal relationships as well as running a household and ruling a kingdom. With wit and insight, Cybulskie draws on a wide variety of primary sources, from handbooks for young knights to romantic poems. Though we may no longer need best practices for things like dueling or ordering about our servants, the principles of generosity, kindness, and respect still apply today. After all, it’s a good reminder to “not talk when you have food in your mouth” and “anything you say should be entertaining, polite, and sophisticated.”
Illustrated with original drawings by Anna Lobanova as well as eighty medieval artworks, Chivalry and Courtesy is full of good advice for everyone, whether you are a peasant or a knight, a student or a CEO, a king or a queen.
- Print length176 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherAbbeville Press
- Publication dateOctober 24, 2023
- Dimensions5.3 x 0.8 x 8.3 inches
- ISBN-100789214695
- ISBN-13978-0789214690
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From the Publisher
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|---|---|---|
| How to Live Like a Monk | Chivalry & Courtesy | |
| How medieval monastic practices―with their emphasis on a healthy soul, mind, and body―can inspire us to live fuller lives today | A surprising look at how medieval etiquette can improve our lives today, from the author of the popular How to Live Like a Monk. |
Editorial Reviews
Review
― Dan Jones, New York Times best-selling author and presenter of Netflix’s Secrets of Great British Castles
"A must read for anyone who wants to brush up on the finer points of etiquette, or who just wants to be a better human being."
― Eleanor Janega, author of The Once and Future Sex: Going Medieval on Women’s Roles in Society and creator of the blog Going Medieval
"Daniele Cybulskie has done it again: no one is better at bringing the medieval world to life. . . . There’s so much to learn from the Middle Ages, and this wonderful book―supremely elegant, witty, expert, and wise―is the ideal guide."
― Helen Castor, medieval historian, broadcaster, and author of She-Wolves and Joan of Arc
About the Author
Product details
- Publisher : Abbeville Press (October 24, 2023)
- Language : English
- Hardcover : 176 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0789214695
- ISBN-13 : 978-0789214690
- Item Weight : 13.8 ounces
- Dimensions : 5.3 x 0.8 x 8.3 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #418,395 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #186 in Etiquette Guides & Advice
- #296 in Customs & Traditions Social Sciences
- #1,119 in Women in History
- Customer Reviews:
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About the author

As a writer, professor, TEDx speaker, and now podcaster, Danièle has been making the Middle Ages fun, entertaining, and accessible for over ten years. She is the author of The Five-Minute Medievalist, which debuted at the top of Amazon’s Canadian charts, and through her featured articles at Medievalists.net, as well as those she’s written for several international magazines, Danièle’s work has been read over half a million times, and counting.
Danièle is the creator and host of The Medieval Podcast, a weekly interview show on which she speaks with experts on the Middle Ages on a wide variety of topics. She also currently teaches The Middle Ages and the Modern World: Facts and Fiction, which she co-created for college students across Ontario via OntarioLearn. Her forthcoming book, Life in Medieval Europe: Fact and Fiction, is being published by Pen & Sword History, and will be available in autumn, 2019.
When she’s not reading, writing, or recording, Danièle can be found drinking tea, doing Krav Maga, or sometimes building a backyard trebuchet.
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Reading that “beauty was seen as an outward sign of inner virtue” many readers will think “well, that’s nothing new.” The more beautiful you were perceived the more virtuous you must have been, thereby more desirable to have. However! Reading that even priests were meant to be handsome?! You’re getting a lot of information, but you’re getting them in easy-to-digest bites.
For readers who enjoy delving deep into history, or want to learn more about how the Middle Ages compares to today Chivalry and Courtesy by Daniele Cybulskie is a must-read. Packed with information and photographs of items or elements that relate to the time are sprinkled throughout it. Each chapter is well-detailed and is sure to keep you engaged as you learn something new.
The history and the balance the author struck with our more modern ideals was the heart of this book. The detailed writing style really brought this time period to life, and the way the author delved into everything from how to eat to how to court and so much more really highlighted the chivalry of the time period. The author did a great job of also stripping away the core values of these etiquette lessons and applying them through a modern lens.






