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Comment: This item is in good condition. All pages and covers are readable. There are no stains or tears. Dust jacket is present if applicable. May contain small amounts of writing and/or highlighting. Spine and cover may show signs of wear. May not contain supplementary items. We ship within 1 business day. Big Hearted Books shares its profits with schools, churches and non-profit groups throughout New England. Thank you for your support!
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Choosing ME Before WE: Every Woman's Guide to Life and Love Paperback – February 1, 2009

4.6 out of 5 stars 96 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Author and life coach Arylo's own life story informs every page of this insightful book. After a 15-year relationship, her fiancé called it quits two hours before the engagement party, causing Arylo, a successful marketing executive, months of devastation and self-doubt. This three-part guide about co-dependent relationships, settling for the wrong man and not knowing what you want begins with Me, showing how crucial it is to get to know yourself first because our relationships are mirrors of ourselves. Arylo delves a little deeper than most by being honest about how many women are in denial about relationships being fueled by the fear of being alone and feeling incomplete. In part two (He), the author guides the reader through a series of visualizations to identify four core qualities the reader wants in her future mate, and part three (We) advises on maintaining authenticity and intimacy in a relationship. This exercise in intention-setting and manifestation will help any woman who wants a lasting partnership that reflects her own true self. (Mar.)
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Review

“A savory, sassy read for every woman seeking more than a fleeting fairy tale.”
— Kimberly Wilson, author of Hip Tranquil Chick

“With wit and wisdom, Arylo teaches us how to find the answers about love and relationships inside ourselves. From here we can accomplish our most heartfelt dreams.”
— Marcia Wieder, founder and CEO of Dream University®
 
“Christine Arylo offers the tips and tools a woman needs to fall in love with her ultimate soul mate: herself. And from that foundation, she can find a ‘he’ and create a healthy and supportive ‘we.’ Every woman should have Choosing ME before WE on her nightstand.”
— Christine Hassler, author of 20 Something, 20 Everything
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 232 pages
  • Publisher: New World Library; No Edition Stated edition (February 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 157731641X
  • ISBN-13: 978-1577316411
  • Product Dimensions: 5.4 x 0.6 x 8.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (96 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #21,721 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
I got this book after reading an article the author wrote on Your Tango about why smart women fail at relationships. It was one of the best decisions I've EVER made and I truly feel that it was divine guidance that led me to this book because reading it helped me change my life! Until that point I thought I loved myself but honestly I didn't know how or even what that meant! This book guided me and gave me the tools to finally deal with old demons which had been plaguing my every step without my realizing it.

Thanks to this book, I finally got off autopilot and realized I'd been living and repeating the same pattern of making bad decisions because I believed I was not worthy enough to have something good. I finally saw that the people, especially the men I was attracted to, I'd been attracting into my life were reflecting how I felt about myself and since I didn't love me, they couldn't love me in the way I needed either. Heck I had left me, so why would anybody else stick around?

Thank you Christine for everything! Thank you for being such an inspiration and for helping countless other women like me to finally understand that validation and acceptance must come from within, first and always. I hope to pay forward my blessing and I've told all my girl friends to read your book.
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Format: Paperback
Choosing ME before WE, was a book I could not put down. It was like getting to know my TRUE self for the first time. I am a middle school counselor and have read many many different self help books and this by far is one of the best.
This book opened my eyes on how I was seeking others for self validations (men particularly), rather then myself. Through the exercise and questions asked through out this book, I reached the "aha" moments that Oprah Winfrey talks about. This book touched my heart and soul. I wished I read this book 10 years ago.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I read this book in 2 sittings. I took notes, I journaled, and I broke through some deep seated limitations.
Thank You Christine, for leading the way!
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Format: Paperback
As a woman in my young twenties in a failing relationship I turned to this book for some perspective. I immediately connected with the author's story of an unfulfilled relationship. This book offers women a way to think about themselves and how they are conducting their lives and relationships. Growing up we don't learn that we have to put ourselves first to be happy, but this book offers a gentle but straightforward reminder that it is your life. Love yourself unconditionally and you will be unconditionally loved. I would recommend it to all of my female friends regardless of their age or relationship status.
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Format: Paperback
What I appreciated most about this book is that anyone can read it and benefit from it -
Regardless of where you are on the relationship spectrum...
married, committed, single, dating, happy with a partner or miserable with a partner
CMBW gives you the tools you need to check-in with yourself and access the most important relationship you have in your life:
the one with YOU.
Because you can't really love anyone until you really truly love and honor yourself
and know what your heart really desires.

I love that Christine Arylo shares her own personal journey with the readers
of what her life was like before she really loved herself.
she learned she wasn't living her heart's deepest desires
and many years of training and inner exploration gave her the tools that she in turn shares with us, her readers

whether you read the book from cover to cover
or decide to just pick a random page to read for the day
her book will give you the insight and practices that are deeply thought-out, fun, and totally transformative!
Plus, Christine is friggin hilarious ;)

HUGELY thankful for this book!
and so are the many friends and family whom I have gifted it to .. :)

Thank you for this wonderful book, Christine
<3

Video Review: [...]
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Format: Paperback
I highly recommend this book to anyone in a serious relationship or even for a mother to give to her 20+ year old daughter. I only wish that I would have had this book before I got married! Trust your instinct! Christine Arlyo provides you with some very insightful thoughts about trusting and honoring yourself first! There are many practical tips and questions that you can ask yourself that will empower you to not settle for less!
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Format: Paperback
There are far too many women who enter into or stay in relationships for the wrong reasons - fear, loneliness, routine, living up to someone else's ideal of what they are supposed to be, etc, etc. This book is a must read for every woman who feels they are living for other people. Knowing and loving oneself is the biggest gift anyone can give themselves. Christine Arylo chronicles many of her own and other women's personal stories of what happened when they entered into relationships without this foundational love of self (broken relationships, disappointment, etc, etc) then shared the courageous choices they made to get back on a healthy path.

I am a strong advocate for marriage and compromise and for living up to commitments I make. I found I could relate these teachings to areas in my life, beyond my interpersonal relationships, where I might have put other's needs ahead of my own. I am in a loving relationship with my husband and find our bond has strengthened as I have learned more about myself. I also have two daughters and I aspire to set the best possible example of how they can be strong women and loving partners.

I really appreciated the lessons in this book and will recommend it to friends.
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