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Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself Paperback – January 1, 1986
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"Melody Beattie is an American phenomenon....She understands being overboard, which helps her throw best-selling lifelines to those still adrift."
About the Author
- Publisher : Hazelden; 1st edition (January 1, 1986)
- Language: : English
- Paperback : 229 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0894864025
- ISBN-13 : 978-0894864025
- Item Weight : 12.6 ounces
- Dimensions : 8.4 x 5 x 0.6 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #276 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer Reviews:
"A timely novel highlighting the worth and delicate nature of Nature itself." -Delia Owens Learn more
Top reviews from the United States
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This book is outstanding. Even if you are not a child or relative or friend of someone with substance issues, even if you do not consider yourself co-dependant, this book is wonderful for building self esteem and setting boundries, or generalized anxiery. After reading and meditating on it, I found myself saying no to things without a moment of second thought. And guess what, it didn't kill anyone that I was saying no.
Codependent No More did not feel like a guide book or advice being thrown around. It read with an eerie sense of familiarity. As I poured through the case studies, I found myself thinking "that is me!" or "I know this person!". It was soon very obvious that I did not understand what being codependent meant. I had always viewed this as a negative label stuck on those whose loved one where addicts. But it is so much more. In fact this is a problem that effects many.
I cannot recommend this title enough. If you are struggling, read it. If you know someone who struggles, read it. If you do not understand codependency, read it.
There is something to be taken from Codependent No More for everyone. It is a refreshing perspective and read.
It became tiresome to read and it made me feel more anxious. On page 107, under #5 point, the author describes how she asked her husband to watch her out the window as she went to her car because it was nighttime and her car was located in a dark alley in a rough part of town. She then stated this was unnecessary as God is watching over her. First of all, there is nothing wrong with asking someone to make sure you don’t get assalted. If you want to preach that God has your back remember too that God helps those who help themselves...so don’t be stupid and use common sense.
The author seems to have written this in a state of hysteria. The extreme feminist ideology that is advocated in the book (since it seemed to be written more with women in mind) is completely unreasonable. In the Christian religion, there is little room for feminism. I worry about what she has to offer writing this book as she herself has not remarried...
I’m not going to throw out the baby with the bath water. I will continue to read this book and read between the lines.
To give some perspective, I was raised in an atheist nilalistic alcoholic family. Nothing was sacred. God is not a person. God is the result from a series of actions that one takes to create a heaven, in a sense, on earth. Study ethics, virtues, and morality and it will take you to a better conclusion then this book ever will. The Bible was not created by a scorned and bitter person.
Top reviews from other countries
I liked her speaking up for the damaged amongst us, not in a pitiful, condescending way, but in a pragmatic, hopeful manner.
But the content was very dense. I appreciate self-help books to be less essay-based, and structured more to facilitate a 'working-towards', piecemeal approach.
I particularly admired her clarity in describing complicated feelings.