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Combined Destinies: Whites Sharing Grief about Racism Hardcover – February 28, 2013

4.7 out of 5 stars 13 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Combined Destinies: Whites Sharing Grief about Racism provides a helpful tool to engage white educators with racism at an affective level."—Christine E. Sleeter, Equity & Excellence in Education
(Christine E. Sleeter Equity & Excellence in Education)

About the Author

ANN TODD JEALOUS is a former marriage and family therapist with a long history of supporting civil rights. CAROLINE T. HASKELL is a licensed clinical social worker and founding director of Health and Wellness Services at California State University–Monterey Bay and the campus affiliate director for the National Coalition Building Institute in Washington DC.
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Potomac Books (February 28, 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1612345743
  • ISBN-13: 978-1612345741
  • Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 0.9 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,291,701 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By V. Kack on June 11, 2013
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This collection of experiences shared by whites about how their lives were impacted as we witnessed the separation created by racist attitudes and practices....some of us "carefully taught" by loved ones to hate or stand by when others oppress. This is a conversation that, while painful and uncomfortable to look at, must occur if we are to ever truly heal this terrible legacy in our culture. Racism is not over until every white person stands up and declares his own racial wound, and vows to include, advocate, and resist whenever we or another person is separated because of race.
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Format: Kindle Edition
Wonderful Book! The thoughtful and thought-provoking work is an engaging book and would work well for a teaching tool and great launch point for discussions. The interviews and personal stories illustrate how much pain and struggle about racism and oppression has been worked through, and makes it clear how much more there is to do. The writing is not dramatic, a helpful approach for the topic. The authors start gently and later reveal more severe incidents, with the intent being always to reveal, to create healing space for both the storytellers and audience. It is never to shock readers. Nonetheless, the reality is impacting. The wide variety of incidents and circumstances depicted here allowed me to revisit memories and think about my experiences better.
As a white boy growing up in agricultural southeast Pennsylvania, race discussion for me was minimized and pushed to the periphery, leaving me disconnected and a bit numb to it as a topic. The 'problem' was 'over there'. Curiosity was not encouraged. This book invites rather than demands a fresh understanding, has compassion for all involved and invites readers to pay better attention to all sides of the stories. You can't help but be moved.
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Format: Hardcover
I contributed my story to this book - and learned more about myself and my experiences in the reflection and writing of it. Reading the other stories broke my heart for the pain and suffering endured and expressed--and at a recent happy event, made me acutely aware of how racism is still entrenched in my world. I attended the wedding of my friend's daughter at Monrovia Villa in Saratoga, a very upscale venue and event. My friend flew in two Latina women from out of state who had been her daughter's first nannies. Over the next three days, I had the pleasure of escorting them to wedding events and family parties. Both were welcomed and treated as honored guests. In the privacy of our hotel, one woman confided that when she asked for time off to attend the wedding, her current employer of 18 years said,"(My friend) must not have very many people to invite if she's doing this for you." Or some such words. I grieved for everyone involved. This book has changed my perception / reality, and I know it will yours as well.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This is a fine book relating to understanding the impact that racism has on children. It covers a wide variety of people relating their memories of how racism impacted their lives. These are personal and heartfelt stories written by white people feeling shame and guilt and being able to release at least a part of it by contributing stories to this excellent book. Kudos to the authors.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Jealous and Haskell masterfully blend a symphony of voices on a less explored topic. The personal experiences are poignant and authentic, evoking our own personal awareness. There are many moments for private tears, while the text is also an excellent vehicle for group discussions.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I grew up in the deep South, hating racism, and I hated living in fear of the Clan, I am white, and I hated the way African Americans were treated, and it was so very hard to do anything to help. I lived every day with guilt, helplessness, and fear. The book tells that side of the story.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This rating was chosen because of the distinct view of racism -from whites' points of view and experience. The lingering effects on all people of racist attitudes are examined and described with a sense of sadness, longing, wisdom and empathy.
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