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The Complete A**hole's Guide to Handling Chicks Paperback – May 1, 2003
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About the Author
Karl Marks is a regular performer in the West Coast comedy circuit, headlining at clubs such as the Improv, Friars Club, and Icehouse. Using the stage as his soapbox, he has successfully offended thousands of hateful women to the raucous applause of drunken men. His material spawns from both time spent at the U. of Southern California, where he double majored in public intoxication and freshman sorority girls, and his many years navigating the thankless, Godforsaken prostitution ring better know as the Los Angeles dating scene. His mother and three sisters should be proud.
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The truth is we call winners, alpha males, etc. "bad boys" and "dangerous". Why? Because those that actually create and succeed and get power are often those that know, control, and manipulate the "system"...that is, the integrated business, legal, and social system. "Nice guys" are usually men who don't know the system...nice simply equates to naive...and that is why nice guys work their life away for "bad boys".
But men love "bad boys" too. We love action heros that break the law...Arnold, Dirty Harry, Deathwish. Why? Because deep down we all know that those that break or bend the law make important things happen. Columbus paved a path of cultural destruction and instituted slavery all the way to our nation, cowboys killed indians and Mexicans clearing a nation for others to live in, the Boston Tea Party, the Revolutionary war (and every war) was orchestrated by "bad boys" and actually fought by "nice guys".
And you don't even have to get away with breaking the law. Criminals are loved for their indescretions...from the Crip who killed a cop to the president who got a BJ, most people, men and women, not only have some level of respect for people for daring to have principles of living beyond the laws of other men. They are no one's b!tches. As the Godfather said "I don't apologize - to take care of my family, and I refused to be a fool, dancing on the string held by all those bigshots."
Anyway, women, like everyone, are looking to increase their odds of becoming a 'winner' too. Winner meaning power...the power to not work, the power to travel, the power to buy what they want, the power to not take crap from anyone. So when looking for a mate, they look for signs that a man is a winner: shoes, cars, looks, the ability to communicate, and 'winning' behavior. Acting impolite indicates that a person might just see through the social system, and actually might actually be or become a winner...instead of the zillions of nice mediocre guy.
Frankly, men look for female winners too, but are too egotistic to allow them to be superior than they are. Thus men typically look for good looking women who are a bit dumber than they are. That way the man has someone who makes them look good in front of others, has something nice to screw, and a good-looking baby maker...and yet can't interfere with the decision making.
I'd say generally wanting to be a winner is a good thing. Just try to not to be shallow or immature with how you define 'winning'...or you will lead a shallow and immature life. The best thing really is to become a mature winner yourself first, then find a matching mate.
Concerning the book, it immaturely pushed the women like bad boys theory too much without specifically explaining why. The truth is you can be a winner and be a good husband too, but you had better be ready to bend the law...think Brando Godfather. Not Pacino Godfather. The later was simply TOO willing to break laws...and he lost his wife for it.
The book was quite entertaining, it kept men's feelings pretty real (rare for today's wussy world), and actually had some usable advice for men at their various stages of life. Due to the lack of books about men's sexual needs and about examining the totality of a man's life, I give this book four stars.
Dan Indante is an attorney and Karl Marks is a comedian, and between the two they have collected all available knowledge about how to treat and tame the fairer sex, and condensed it into a highly readable 249 pages. What's truly astonishing about the book is that the insights that the authors offer about women are consistent with those offered by Neil Strauss in "The Game" and what the neuro-scientist Louann Brizendine offers in "The Female Brain": women are highly prone to insecurities and emotional volatility, and whose focus and energy are devoted to winning the praise and support of other women in their youth, and then, in their adulthood, to raising and maintaining a family. That's why assholes in the end always win: with their stupid and selfish, callous and reckless behavior they're always triggering the emotional insecurities of women, causing them to rely on and depend on the very men who disgust and outrage them.
It is hard to discern what drives the two authors to write such a malicious but truthful book. Machiavelli wrote "The Prince" as a job application, looking to become a trusted adviser to the Medici family. But what could the authors possibly hope to gain from admitting that they're assholes who would like to create an army of assholes? I suppose, an army of assholes is one answer -- but who really wants to control an army of assholes, except maybe Dick Cheney and Paris Hilton? The book may be funny and witty at times, but I suspect it is written out of intense self-loathing and disgust. Which woman or women could have possibly driven the authors to such a mad violent reading of an entire sex? Unfortunately, the authors reveal nothing about themselves, which leads us even more to conclude that there must be a sordid, tragic past behind this entertaining and enlightening book.
Most recent customer reviews
Rated one chick at a 30.... less than Butters the dog.
That was the last we saw of her.