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on June 8, 2009
Pam Leo's book on Connection Parenting makes you feel good just from reading it. Her approach is clearly laid out, gentle, kind, logical and very helpful, urging parents and child care people to first connect with children, and then "work with" them. As a person who spent a lot of time on my grandparent's farm, where children were included in everything, taught as the day progressed, and learned to be adults by modeling on the integrity and caring of the adults they spent HOURS of time with, I appreciate Leo's concern for the isolation of children, and her calling parents back to spending time connecting with children, restoring children's ability and willingness to cooperate. Every parent should have this book as required reading. Violence and behavior problems in schools and in our culture would be cut in half, overnight! (I offer this review as a Marriage Counselor with 37 years of experience, a parent educator, and author of books that offer parents help with teaching their children how to deal with the emotions of anger, hurt, grief, guilt, love, intimacy, shame and remorse, loneliness, jealousy and fear. This is a GOOD book!)

Exploring Fear With Your Child
Exploring Hurt Feelings With Your Child
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on August 7, 2015
Invaluable reading for any parent who wishes to become equipped with healthy and effective parenting approaches. These are difficult times in which to raise a child, but if one has sensible and loving tools at hand--hints and rehearsals--of how to act or what to say in different situations, the obligations and responsibilities of being a "good-enough" parent becomes not so daunting and tentative. It's easy to read and grasp the concepts. A MUST read! It's too bad that we, in this society, don't have more classes or places of learning on how to be an effective parent. There simply is not enough focus or emphasis on the necessity of learning and having at hand the tools for parenting. It is the core issue of the ongoing difficulties in our culture: Ineffective and ill-prepared parenting.
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on January 6, 2006
Dear Pam

I just finished Connection Parenting and wanted to write and tell you how much I loved it. I actually read through it and plan to go back and take each chapter by chapter and do all the exercises. Even just reading straight through has helped so much. I finished it yesterday and found myself today trying not say don't and to think twice speak once.

I feel this book has so much needed information for parents. Each chapter I read I kept saying to myself, that makes so much sense. I would take key paragraphs and have my husband read them. He too found it helpful. Though we are attachment parenters to our 20 month old son , there are still things I find myself say or do that I want to change. It also brought me back to childhood and habits I have made sense to me. Like crying when angry and biting my nails for example.

I could go on and on about what I liked about the book, but since it was everything, I just want to share the certain points you made that I can't get out of my head.

The Ghandi/Hitler role reversal section was very powerful. The think twice/speak once had a huge impact on me. It just make total sense. The section where you wrote about babies crying is supposed to bother us is information that I knew, but when you followed it with a child's button pushing behavior is also meant to bother us. Again made total sense. Of course they are trying to tell us something is wrong!

again, this is just a short list of what I loved about the book.

I made a promise to myself after I had my son that when any friend or family member became pregnant I was going to give them a selection of books that I felt were important to read. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, and The Baby Book are at the top of the list. I want you to know Connection Parenting just got added to my must give list and one of the top ones. Though my son is only 20 months, I wish I had had it when I was pregnant. Your book is a must have for any parent.

Thank you so much for this book and I would love to see your workshop in NH!


Jamie Hupfer
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on June 11, 2013
I'm the librarian for an attachment parenting group. This is the one book that our members always refer to and recommend to others who come to us, looking for help. We've had discussion groups using it, and it gets checked out more than any other book in the library. I needed to replace a copy that left and didn't return.
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on November 28, 2013
So insightful. I'm very into natural horsemanship. This should be called natural parenting. The only thing is my child is 5 now, and I feel so guilty for the things I've done wrong so far. I will be playing catch up to correct the mistakes I've made. I've been following the guidelines here for about a month, and the cooperation he has shown has drastically improved. He verbalizes his feelings better, because I am more connected to him, he feels safe, and I'm listening to what he has to say. For anyone serious about raising resilient, thoughtful, cooperative adults, please buy this book and do what it says, and read Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids too
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on March 25, 2007
I believe this is the book to get and give. It is simple yet powerful. Quick to read and you can begin fresh in your parenting right away. A great book to share with your parenting partners. I have read many books I consider very important to my own parenting journey, but this one is the most comprehensive (yet to-the-point). It refers to many other books you can read to follow up for more inspiration like Playful Parenting by L. Cohen. However, in a phone call with Ms. Leo, she indicated two other books that are new that didn't make it into Connection Parenting before it was printed. I got those books and love them, too. They are: ScreamFree Parenting by Runkel(she didn't agree with everything but thought it was overall a great book, and I do too); Raising Our Children Raising Ourselves by Naomi Aldort (fantastic book. Love the S.A.L.V.E. formula which was also something I put to work right away with my toddler.) Change your whole life by trying these 3 books, starting with Connection Parenting, and seeing how far the rabbit hole goes by undoing your own patterns of old behaviors. Anyone can parent more mindfully, more gently, and with more sensitivity to their child and build a relationship based on two-way respect.
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on March 13, 2013
Pam Leo writes so well - this book has literally changed my relationship with my children from the first chapter. Almost like a lightbulb and a switch, she so easily brings to light how best to understand your kids and become closer to them in the process. I keep re-reading the chapters because I really want to remember and implement everything she is trying to convey. And my relationship with my kids is changing so much for the better. I am thankful I was able to come across this book. Would definitely recommend to any parent (and anyone thinking of becoming a parent or is pregnant with their first)!!
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on December 19, 2012
This book should be a mandatory read for anyone having children. It is focused on truly respecting our children, forgiving ourselves for our patterns, and working with it in a constructive and healing way. If you don't want to delve too deeply, you can still glean so much amazing info from this book. I lent it out as soon as I finished it, and will lend it out again as soon as I can.. And if I were a rich woman, I would buy this book by the case and give it away for free at clinics and and anywhere where a soon to be parent may be....
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on December 5, 2013
I've gotten tons of helpful information from this book which I've been able to immediately apply. It's a quick read and gives examples which is a must for me. I appreciate that this book doesn't feel judgmental. It suggests forgiving yourself for past parenting transgressions and doing the best with what time, and patience, you have. Since reading this I have become much more aware of how I speak to my daughter - I'm more respectful and I think we're both happier for it.
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on January 4, 2008
I bought this book on the high recommendation from friends. Boy, was it worth it! I'm not a mom who is working with perfect, well-behaved children trying to hone my skills. I'm a frazzled, anxious mom with 2 children with special needs. Let me tell you, Connection Parenting WORKS!

I've been working on at least 15 minutes of uninterrupted one-on-one time with each child per day (just one of MANY useful tips in this book). It is making a tremendous impact on both children, especially my son. He is much more cuddly and happy. The tips and tools in this book are really amazing. A parenting journal is just essential. It helps heal our past and change us to help our kids' needs.

I can't say enough. Go out and buy it! You WON'T regret it!
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