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The Courage to Trust: A Guide to Building Deep and Lasting Relationships Paperback – January 2, 2005

4.3 out of 5 stars 43 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“In The Courage to Trust, Cynthia Wall helps us to discover the genuine source of much of our pain and the pain in our relationships and offers us simple, powerful ways to begin to heal it. This wise and beautifully written book is a blessing for every friend, every parent, every lover and every human being.”
—Rachel Naomi Remen, MD, clinical professor of family and community medicine at the University of California, San Francisco, School of Medicine; medical director of the Commonweal Cancer Help Program; and author of Kitchen Table Wisdom and My Grandfather's Blessings

From the Publisher

An impaired ability to trust others can create serious problems for anyone; this book contains step-by-step techniques for understanding an individual's patterns of trust, developing strong instincts about whom to trust and learning how to build strong, lasting relationships.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 176 pages
  • Publisher: New Harbinger Publications; 1 edition (January 2, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1572243805
  • ISBN-13: 978-1572243804
  • Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 0.4 x 9.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (43 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #221,078 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By S. Ryan on April 25, 2006
Format: Paperback
I recently had someone come back into my life that I lied to by omission. Our second time around he was having trouble trusting me. I told a white lie and he blew up. I was sitting there scratching my head thinking what's his problem. I decided to order some books about trust to get a handle on my issue with lying. This book has shown me why I choose to not be truthfull all the time. I am trying to protect myself from how I think the person will react by knowing the truth. I'm not trustfull or trustworthy. I this book is really helping me see a better way to be.
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Format: Paperback
As a psychotherapist and devoted reader I am always looking for books to recommend that simply, clearly, and effectively communicate how we can live our lives with greater freedom. Cynthia Wall has written an elegant book. Her warm voice guides us throught terrain that we may never have attempted to travel without her wise and kind encouragement. And she leads us in such a way that, amazingly!, it's not all that hard, and (really) not too scary. The exercises are great - small, doable steps. Any book I truly value accompanies me to the beach, the coffee house and (if it's really good and useful) to the bathtub. My copy of this book is water logged; the highest possible praise.
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Format: Paperback
Good at helping to understand why we react in a protective manner when we feel threatened.
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By RK on February 16, 2005
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is a must read for anyone looking to find true intimacy and fulfilling relationships. Cynthia Wall helps us understand that we already have the keys to success when we learn to trust ourselves. Not only is the book elegantly and compassionatly written, we are given grouding and practical exercises to help access and understand our own personal trust patterns. I have shared and given this book to many of the most imporatant people in my life.
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I originally bought the book to read about trust after some painful experiences. I found a lot more in it. The author says that there are three distinct parts in each of us, the "Child", the "Protector", and the "Adult". Keeping this in mind i revisited past situations etc. The principle helped me understand A LOT about my own behavior and also the behavior of other people involved. This allowed me to reduce my own guilt for past mistakes and also my anger towards others. Moving forward it has also helped me handle situations better. My expectations are more realistic because I have a better understanding of the limitations of our human nature (in general) and of each specific person (including mine). I can identify if my or the other person's action(s) stem from the Child, the Protector, or the Adult, and respond accordingly. I feel more in-balance as a person and more confident in handling inter-personal situations. All this has helped me open up more, get closer to people, and engage more courageously in relationships with others. Overall a great, eye-opening, and very helpful book that worked for me. I highly recommend it and I hope it works for others too. BTW the book is thin but has LOTS of self-exploring exercises. Unless you have ample time, I would recommend to just read the exercises, then revisit and spend more time on the ones that apply the most.
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Format: Paperback
Until I read The Courage to Trust, I had no idea that many of my personal and professional struggles centered around the issue of being able to trust myself. Cynthia Wall is a warm and loving guide who makes it safe for the reader to venture into uncharted territory. I found the exercises to be extremely helpful. They allowed me to take a deep, honest look at how I react to particular situations. After reading this book, I feel more confident, and have experienced a great deal of success in both my personal and professional life.
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Format: Paperback
The issue of trust -- of others and of myself -- comes up all the time. Whom do I really trust, and how do I build trust with people whom I would like to trust more? How much can I safely let back in people who have betrayed my trust in the past? What moves can I make that will make me more trustworthy? Cynthia Wall's exercises are often helpful in clarifying underlying blocks, allowing me to go much deeper into the real issues.

I am in a process of exploring this issue with my women's group this year; it's a very rich and scary topic. The Courage to Trust is a valuable, compassionate guide for us in this exploration. I think anyone who has ever been betrayed or disappointed by someone will find helpful support in this beautifully and thoughtfully written book.
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Format: Paperback
For any of you who have been hurt--by a dysfunctional family situation or an adult betrayal--this book is helping me to connect how the past is inhibiting me from having all life has to offer. After reading the first 20 pages, I had a few tactics and goals to make a difference in my life. It also confirmed for me that self-trust is the basis for the other types. It's well worth the investment in time and money.
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