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A Cruzmas Carol: Ted Cruz Takes a Dickens of a Constitutional (White House Sweet '16 Book 1) by [Lacey Noonan]

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Lacey Noonan

A Cruzmas Carol: Ted Cruz Takes a Dickens of a Constitutional (White House Sweet '16 Book 1) Kindle Edition

by Lacey Noonan (Author) Format: Kindle Edition

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What the dickens is wrong with sexy-man Ted Cruz?

He’s got it all… The stunning good looks, the six-pack abs, the women draped all over him, the perfect record as a hard-balling, take-no-guff U.S. Senator.

So why won’t he run for president? What’s his deal? Why’s he being such a Tedbenezer Scruz?

At a party in his honor at Fizzywhigs—the exclusive Washington, D.C. club—Ted surprises one and all with a shocking announcement: He’s retiring from politics! The private sector is calling, its easy, greasy cash flow and lazy requirements are too seductive to pass up.

But his plans are about to change. After a *hot* makeout sesh with his sexy staffer Roberta, Ted has a digestive emergency and sprints to the men’s room, where he runs into an old, long-dead coworker. Irritated, not heeding this magical spirit’s warnings, Ted is told he will be visited by three more ghosts in the bathroom before the night is over.

Ted ignores these omens, and so within minutes is being sucked through glory hole after ol’ glory hole to the past, present and future to learn some heartwarming lessons about America, freedom and also American freedom!

It will take everything that these three “spirits of the men’s room” have to bring Ted to his senses. It’s up to them—the Bathroom Attendants of Constitutionality Past, Present and Future—to warm his heart towards the world, to teach this perfect, sexy politician with the abs of a male model what it means to truly give oneself up to the greater good—and to award humanity with his manhood deep in the Oval Office.

Rich with derisive and scintillating prose, and illustrated with 36 handsome drawings, “A Cruzmas Carol” by Lacey Noonan will leave you satisfied and panting for more.

’Tis the season… the POLITICAL season!

Product details

ASIN ‏ : ‎ B019EP2TAK
Publisher ‏ : ‎ The Dishes Are Done, Man (December 15, 2015)
Publication date ‏ : ‎ December 15, 2015
Language ‏ : ‎ English
File size ‏ : ‎ 6838 KB
Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
Print length ‏ : ‎ 110 pages
Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ 152275573X

Best Sellers Rank: #2,711,619 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #6,001 in Historical Erotica (Kindle Store)
- #7,437 in Historical Erotica (Books)
- #9,400 in Humorous Erotica (Kindle Store)

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4 ratings

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Lacey Noonan

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Lacey Noonan lives on the East Coast with her husband and dog that thinks it's a cat. Come to think of it, that could go for Lacey too (in terms of licking and heaving petting).

When not sipping on fine whiskeys or whipping up some killer veggie tacos, she loves to read and write steamy, strange, silly, psychological and sexy stories. She loves wordplay and foreplay in equal measure. Most days, in her spare time (re: day job) she is a web designer and developer.

For more information on Lacey Noonan, why not slither your browser snake to...

Mailing List:

http://eepurl.com/bEeNgv

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laceynoonan123@gmail.com

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Austin

The perfect Christmas adaptation

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 20, 2019

Verified Purchase

Gather round the fire and dive into this classic Christmas tale with an American twist! If there are two things that raise my flagpole it's Christmas and Ted Cruz.
Why do I like Ted Cruz?
Reason 1: He's definitely a human
Reason 2: He's only one entity and not several
My only complaint is that the author chose to omit Ted Cruz's gruesome past as the Zodiac Killer. Especially since it would become so critical in informing his policy decisions later in life.

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