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The Curse of the Capable: The Hidden Challenges to a Balanced, Healthy, High-Achieving Life Paperback – November 3, 2009
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"Bravo! Dr. Ciaramicoli has written his best book. The Curse of the Capable is a wonderful find in the toolshed of happiness. If you are alive, this book is for you. Dr. Ciaramicoli tackles the problems capable people face with impeccable psychological competence and the genuine compassion you can expect from an authority on empathy."
P.M. Forni, Professor, Johns Hopkins University and author of The Civility Solution: What to Do when People are Rude.
"This is a rare and special book, wise and helpful, savvy and profound and should be a real life saver for millions who are actually prevented by their drive and ability from having lives that are genuinely satisfying. A wonderful road map not just to a good life but to a life that feels good."
Mira Kirshenbaum Author of the Emotional Energy Factor, When Good People Have Affairs and Everything Happens for a Reason
Discover what achievers all over the world are realizing.
The story you created about yourself early in life, which is part fiction, is having a dramatic impact on your present lifestyle--how you think and live.
The assumption that all capable people in our culture have peace of mind and are satisfied with their life course is commonplace. Is this notion true? Not always. In fact millions have fallen prey to a belief system that says appearance and status provide the golden road to love and respect. In an attempt to perfect themselves, they are hiding their self doubt through constant achievement at the cost of losing balance and well-being.
Suffering from being overwhelmed emotionally and physically, exhausted and fatigued, often with the health complications of being overweight; they have felt deeply disappointed.
The Curse of the Capable describes how a biased view of yourself can lead to a fragile sense of self, addictive thinking and behavior, and a seemingly mysterious downward spiral that the majority of people can’t see or untangle. Foreword by Phil Simms, Superbowl MVP, NFL Sports Analyst, Former New York Giant
Top Customer Reviews
The Curse of the Capable, provides examples of intellectually keen and competent adults for whom external achievement has not necessarily been accompanied by internal fulfillment; thus, the unrecognized compulsion to repeat this cycle may lead to immeasurable loss rather than true gain. At great cost, as also described in Performance Addiction, the relentless pursuit of "more," paradoxically, yields "less." For these individuals, the emotions of authentic joy and sincere pride, (often assumed by others to come with such remarkable external accomplishment,)in fact, may seem elusive and fleeting.
Dr. Ciaramicoli incorporates an holistic approach so that each individual may become aware of the fundamental choices that he/she needs to consciously make in order to develop a healthy balance of body, mind, and spirituality. The interplay of these factors cannot be over-stated, as they profoundly impact upon one another; thus, significantly contribute to the adaptability and essential well-being of each person.
In order to live a healthful life, The Curse of the Capable provides an invaluable step-by-step guide that empowers each reader to take pause, consider his/her inner-life, challenge historically entrenched assumptions, and make mindful and informed decisions about his/her values and priorities.Read more ›
So many people meet the authors' definition of "capable" -- people who by all outward appearances are doing what they need to do, succeeding, and achieving their goals. They are often the go-to people for everyone around them because they are so able. Yet internally they feel "off" -- something isn't right. Achieving doesn't seem like enough. If this is you -- you really need this amazing book.
In fact after just the first chapter alone you can begin to have clarity about where your story comes from and finally arrive at an understanding about what's happening inside you. One section I find especially helpful is the set of reflection questions at the end of the chapters. When you take the time to thoughtfully write the answers to these questions, you have the opportunity to see your story and your life in a whole new perspective.
You will likely see some or many aspects of yourself in the stories and real life examples of people who also experienced "the curse." To read how others came to become free from their curses provides hope. If someone else can get free, you can get free too.
As you read this book, you have the opportunity to reflect on all the important relationships in your life and how you treat yourself as well. A wonderful read and definitely helpful.
Exercise Physiologist/Personal Trainer
While the book presents theories for the addictive behavior of the high performance individual, one of the most compelling reason to read the book is the never ending stream of real life practical examples that demonstrate how individuals make positive changes in their lives and rid themselves of their destructive, addictive behavior. It shows how ordinary individuals can truly change to truly make their lives better, by improving their marriages, their physical, emotional and spiritual health and relationships with family members and friends.
The book discusses the story that plays inside the heads of those who become performance addicts, the consequences of being a performance addict and how personal situations improve as the addict journeys through the recovery process. The impact of performance addiction on intimate relationships is discussed and how the need for perfection drives us to self-destructive behaviors. It covers the need for balance between our work, personal and spiritual lives to achieve true health and happiness. With today's hectic lifestyles, who doesn't need some coaching on how to live a more balanced lifestyle?Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
John Allen and Dr. C wrote a terrific book detailing how one can learn from the past but not let the past dictate present or future actions.Published on May 30, 2013 by rj
I ordered curse of the capable after I heard and interview With Dr. Ciaramicoli and Deb Micek (@coachdeb). From the second that I heard Dr. Read morePublished on December 22, 2010 by Scott Sylvan Bell
Another wonderful book by an author who challenges us to re-evaluate our lives and set a course that will bring us true happiness and fulfillment - the goals most of us are... Read morePublished on October 9, 2010 by Bryan
Dr. Ciaramicoli has identified a syndrome I have long wondered about. I know and worked with so many capable individuals over the years who lead very dissatisfied personal lives. Read morePublished on September 23, 2010 by RT
Imagine yourself feeling better and stronger. One of the many powerful insights Dr. Arthur Ciaramicoli brings is that "the stories you use to describe yourself . . . Read morePublished on September 23, 2010 by Tom Marcoux
I have been envied most of my life for my accomplishments. I attended good schools, played sports, take very good care of my appearance and now have a desirable job. Read morePublished on June 17, 2010 by Amy