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The Curse of the Capable: The Hidden Challenges to a Balanced, Healthy, High-Achieving Life Paperback – November 3, 2009
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"Bravo! Dr. Ciaramicoli has written his best book. The Curse of the Capable is a wonderful find in the toolshed of happiness. If you are alive, this book is for you. Dr. Ciaramicoli tackles the problems capable people face with impeccable psychological competence and the genuine compassion you can expect from an authority on empathy."
P.M. Forni, Professor, Johns Hopkins University and author of The Civility Solution: What to Do when People are Rude.
"This is a rare and special book, wise and helpful, savvy and profound and should be a real life saver for millions who are actually prevented by their drive and ability from having lives that are genuinely satisfying. A wonderful road map not just to a good life but to a life that feels good."
Mira Kirshenbaum Author of the Emotional Energy Factor, When Good People Have Affairs and Everything Happens for a Reason
Discover what achievers all over the world are realizing.
The story you created about yourself early in life, which is part fiction, is having a dramatic impact on your present lifestyle--how you think and live.
The assumption that all capable people in our culture have peace of mind and are satisfied with their life course is commonplace. Is this notion true? Not always. In fact millions have fallen prey to a belief system that says appearance and status provide the golden road to love and respect. In an attempt to perfect themselves, they are hiding their self doubt through constant achievement at the cost of losing balance and well-being.
Suffering from being overwhelmed emotionally and physically, exhausted and fatigued, often with the health complications of being overweight; they have felt deeply disappointed.
The Curse of the Capable describes how a biased view of yourself can lead to a fragile sense of self, addictive thinking and behavior, and a seemingly mysterious downward spiral that the majority of people can’t see or untangle. Foreword by Phil Simms, Superbowl MVP, NFL Sports Analyst, Former New York Giant
Top customer reviews
If you are in a relationship some of the stories may help you understand why your partner and you have challenges. If you are willing to take the challenges at the end of each chapter you will be able to get a much better perspective on where you are. If possible it may help to read this book and work out the challenges or questions at the end with your partner.
Overall this is a great book and will help you if you put the time and effort into it.
The Curse of the Capable, provides examples of intellectually keen and competent adults for whom external achievement has not necessarily been accompanied by internal fulfillment; thus, the unrecognized compulsion to repeat this cycle may lead to immeasurable loss rather than true gain. At great cost, as also described in Performance Addiction, the relentless pursuit of "more," paradoxically, yields "less." For these individuals, the emotions of authentic joy and sincere pride, (often assumed by others to come with such remarkable external accomplishment,)in fact, may seem elusive and fleeting.
Dr. Ciaramicoli incorporates an holistic approach so that each individual may become aware of the fundamental choices that he/she needs to consciously make in order to develop a healthy balance of body, mind, and spirituality. The interplay of these factors cannot be over-stated, as they profoundly impact upon one another; thus, significantly contribute to the adaptability and essential well-being of each person.
In order to live a healthful life, The Curse of the Capable provides an invaluable step-by-step guide that empowers each reader to take pause, consider his/her inner-life, challenge historically entrenched assumptions, and make mindful and informed decisions about his/her values and priorities. Just as in The Power of Empathy, here again, the author teaches each of us that it is vital to understand the process of being empathic in order to create connections that bring meaning into our day-to-day lives. Empathy is essential as we seek to interact and nurture relationships with others , develop an accurate portrayal of how we are perceived in the here-and-now, and discover the experience of genuine intimacy and love.
The Curse of the Capable provides a path by which to learn, grow, and cultivate resilience. We are able to readily relate to the stories of the individuals and couples that are shared by Dr. Ciaramicoli; their lives inspire courage and hope, showing that change is truly viable. This book may be utilized in a variety of ways that include it being: a private guide to journal one's inner-most thoughts; a catalyst to pursue individual or couples psychotherapy; or an inspiration to seek membership in a coached growth-group.
Clinical Psychologist, Chapel Hill
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