In a few words: Inauthentic, clumsy pace, half-hearted, and shallow as a drama. Badly-timed unfunny one liners whose only apparent comedic value is a "gay context." Problematic as "gay cinema."
SPOILER ALERT: This review spoils it all
Act 1, Minutes 1-20:
Colin and Stewart are white, single, gay/bi, middle-aged, lifelong friends, next-door neighbors, and all around BFFs that fooled around in college but (mostly) not anymore; after a few it doesn't count since they can just say they don't remember. Sometimes they watch Sports and eat ice cream like typical gays as depicted by the scene where the typical gays are depicted doing typically gay things. Things like being codependent, long-term, (mostly) non-intimate, life-partners that kind of cohabitate, identify as "best-friends" and "single" but whose relationship immediately crumbles when one of them begins dating.
Colin gets established as bar trawling super-promiscuous alpha gay suit daddy via montage, while Stewart is established as semi-celibate gay via pathetic admission but is entirely motivated by moving this incoherent mess of plot lines to a conclusion.
Colin is a big shot sportscaster personality at work and Tee is the young, black, college intern with a sketchy past and debilitating gay face. Stewart also works for the same company in the same office (which is probably why they "don't live together" and also "don't fool around")
Colin quickly profiles Tee as having daddy issues and totally DTF with his highly developed alpha-daddy-gaydar and on account of Tee's scarlet letter face.
Act 2, Minutes 21-40:
Colin invites Tee out to his career-first happy hour and to cap off the evening late 40's Colin textbook sexually assaults the 21 year old intern in his charge. First by exposing himself in public and urinating on a dumpster outside the bar he just left that I'm guessing has a bathroom and then kissing Tee with dubious consent. Colin has a meltdown after realizing his gaydar may be out of calibration and that he might need to murder Tee right then and there to escape justice. Tee responds by going down on Colin in the alley behind the bar against the disgusting pee-dumpster. Then they just keep going at it like a couple characters in a bad indie movie. Seriously this part of the movie is just a bunch of scenes with implied sex strung together.
Interspersed between implied banging, Colin displays Olympic medalist level red-flag ignoring ability and puts Stewart's 20+ years of "friendship" on thin ice with a barely-there jealousy angle so Stewart retreats to a cocoon spun from newspaper clippings and lab results he finds in a file cabinet in an undisclosed location. Stewart's sole purpose at this point is to be used as a strategic prop placed between Colin and Tee's hips at every opportunity to end the marathon montage of non-sex scenes.
Act 3, Minutes 41-60:
Always-around-booty-call intern Unstable-Tee quickly works on dismantling what is left of Colin and Stewart's sham friendship via aggressive couch space usage and stalwart refusal to wear clothes.
Stewart completes the transformation into a plot device and emerges from his cocoon, unable to use a doorbell but ready to wrap this mess up and prepare all the ingredients for the M. Night Shyamalan twist ending with the heavy subject matter that Colin and Unstable-Tee's whole relationship is a fantasy role play of anyway. But it's OK because Tee is biracial and thus visually dissimilar.
Unstable-Tee and Plot-Device-Stewart begin collaboration on 15ft papier-mâché-like medieval jousting lance constructed entirely of anti-gay religious propaganda, red-flags, and using Unstable-Tee's uneaten food as binding.
Unstable-Tee becomes increasingly erratic and bratty, eventually mouthing off to the wrong one and getting knocked out at the office. And get this, everyone immediately stands up for the assailant and absolutely nobody tries to help Unstable-Tee. This creates an opportunity for Plot-Device-Stewart to alert Colin so he can run across the building and reveal his relationship to Unstable-Tee unnecessarily, later causing his disgraced resignation. When Colin sees the ragdoll-like Unstable-Tee, he suddenly forgets he's supposed to be an alpha male and flings himself to the ground like a wilted flower and whisper-whines "baby" to his unconscious body in front of all his coworkers instead of figuring out who put hands on his boy.
Somehow this serves as irrefutable evidence that they are a couple but it's never really addressed.
Act 4, Minutes 61-89:
Plot-Device-Stewart teleports from the office location to an undisclosed location using the powers of being a plot device in a bad indie movie. He then relocates the cocoon papers, realizing now that in the context of a distribution level sized sack of Adderall, weird anti-gay propaganda, and serial killer amounts of newspaper clippings related to Colin among the actual plot device papers that he's extremely disturbed. He then teleports back to Colin's home and stages an intervention for Colin's chronic inability to see red flags using a red file containing the plot device papers folder as a teaching aide.
Colin and Unstable-Tee arrive from the "hospital" location right on cue and Colin reveals his ability to ignore red flags extends also to red file folders until Stewart uses the power of plot device to make him acknowledge he's holding a plot device. His sudden realization brings into clarity that Unstable-Tee is actually just an errant force of destruction fueled by drugs and red flags that have been sucked into the singularity-like void of morality that exists as the flames of Hell around Unstable-Tee, spewing fumes of mental illness like thick clouds of smoke. Here it is, the big "shattering secret": it is now revealed by Plot-Device-Stewart that Unstable-Tee is Colin's biological son AND that Unstable-Tee knew the whole time, like the whole time. Like before he blew Colin in the alley but did it anyway. That's right, a black gay man that tricked his white cis reproductive alpha-gay sportscaster father, the most acceptable gay, into an incestuous relationship, AKA Satan.
At which point we have a 17 minute resolve-everything-montage of Colin reconciling the fact that he's actually OK with it all by going for a jog, being a waiting room somewhere and crying at Unstable-Tee-Satan, watching sports with Plot-Device-Steven and formalizing their actual-two-father-son relationship status (it's unclear if the sex will stop), and adding a potential 3rd dad to the scenario in Plot-Device-Steven's new live in boyfriend.