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10 Days to a Less Defiant Child: The Breakthrough Program for Overcoming Your Child's Difficult Behavior Paperback – May 19, 2006
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This book changed me, and in the process, changed my son. It happened gradually, and we still have a ways to go, but the change is there. It has done more than all the therapists we've seen, combined. It has made me realize that at least 50% of the problem I had with my son was due to how I parented him. This book doesn't assign blame on parents for children's behavior. The author is understanding that when you are dealing with angry, out-of-control kids that our first instinct may be to crack down even more. But, parental anger often makes the child even angrier, and more determined to defy you. This has been the key thing I have taken away from this book. I have to keep MY anger in check when dealing with my son's. I will reread this book whenever I need a gentle reminder.
It's hard to imagine that you could do something differently when you feel that you are at the end of your rope and that you have done absolutely everything possible for your child, but Bernstein compassionately enables you, the parents, to view your child differently and shows you how you can treat her/him differently.
It enables you, the parent, to regain a feeling of control--of yourself first.
We have a 14 year old grandson who is this type of child and it's very difficult to understand why he does what he does. This book has truly helped everyone around him to deal with the situation.