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The Truth Behind The "Fairytale" Marriage...
on August 13, 2014
"Dear Cary: My Life with Cary Grant" (2011) Dyan Cannon reveals the stunning life altering details of her relationship/marriage and subsequent divorce; to Cary Grant (1904-1986) known as an incredibly handsome "debonair screen icon".
Although Grant was 33 years older then Cannon, her youth, beauty, personality, and worldly inexperience likely appealed to him. They were an absolutely stunning couple. They married (at Grants insistence) in a quickie Las Vegas wedding ceremony in 1965. The birth of their beautiful baby daughter Jennifer Diane followed on February 26, 1966. Grant retired from acting shortly after, and they resided at his California mansion.
The "fairytale" marriage was not as happy as it appeared to be publically. Behind closed doors Grant was moody, his remoteness led to unbearably long silences. Cannon could not please him no matter how hard she tried, he either controlled or criticized nearly everything about her and/or their life together. He picked untold fights, deliberately creating drama engineered to create the necessary distance he (seemed) to need. Cannon sought therapy, also advice from Grant's spiritual advisor, who simply said (after Cannon told her about the problems she and Grant were having): "That doesn't sound like love". Grant would also pressure Cannon use/try LSD, (he was an established user) for "improvement" to be a better "enlightened" wife. Not surprisingly, this didn't bridge the distance between them. Cannon refused to take LSD during her pregnancy, though he urged her to do so. Another later time, Grant picked a final fight, and was gone overnight. He soon sent his personal assistant/manager to ask her for a divorce, which Cannon never anticipated, her spirit seemed to be crushed, and worn down from all the conflict.
Although Cannon loved Grant immensely, she knew it would be impossible to meet his unrealistic standards, and they would never find a shred of genuine happiness together. Following their divorce in 1968, Cannon had a complete total mental breakdown and was hospitalized. Her account of this time was tremendously sad and heartbreaking.
Cannon's memoir of her marriage to Grant didn't portray a typical mutually satisfying relationship. Grant seemingly had his own agenda from the day he began courting Cannon; and it didn't involve being a truthful, loving, supportive boyfriend/husband. Cannon has publically denied Grant was gay. To her credit, she has come to terms with his marital neglect/abuse. Grant was after all, the love of her life, the man in and of her dreams, the father of her only child, and she has made peace with his memory. Wonderful photos were included.