- File Size: 183 KB
- Print Length: 20 pages
- Publication Date: January 8, 2012
- Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B006V73IL4
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
- Word Wise: Enabled
- Lending: Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,282,577 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
The Demon Version Kindle Edition
|Length: 20 pages||Word Wise: Enabled||Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled|
|Page Flip: Enabled||
Matchbook Price: $0.00
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Top Customer Reviews
so its creepy and inventive. i have now read all his other stories and i find myself wanting two things.
1 i want more of them and 2 i want them longer. i swear if there was a full length novel of his i would buy it right away.
as for the story itself its a good demonstration of what someone can do with a short story. you dont need to know every detail of how why and what. it is there and as long as you are drawn into it and riveted to it you will be reading it to the end and find yourself wanting more of it. that is the effect i had from this one.
i once read the acid house by Irvine welsh and i think this is the story he hadnt thought of
The author has a great talent for fitting a lot of story into a little bit of space. The characters are all very well developed and you feel like you know them even though you really only spend such a small amount of time with them. The plotline moves right along smoothly from start to finish and it's an all around enjoyable story that mixes humor with horror perfectly. This story is terrific as it is and would also be brilliant as a much longer version as well.
I'm not going to give anything away with the story because you should really stop reading this review now and go reads the story for yourself. It's well worth it. Great story!
The characters are very much like anyone who may know, or have met at some point, so they feel comfortable right from the beginning. I have to say that it's one of the things that will make me love a story; being comfy with the people I'm reading about.
I'm never one to give anything away in a story, but I will say that I'll read more of his work, and I'll keep my fingers crossed that a full length story gets releases in the future. Well done!
For me, this story didn't really work. There wasn't any build up in tension. Instead we get a mishmash of drinking, chatter and going back and forth thrown together with an unexplained possession from a 'haunted room' which wasn't described or grounded in any sort of lore or back-story. There's a haunted room, one of them went in it, acted a bit odd including superhuman strength & hypnotism then it's all over for no rhyme or reason.
However I do think the author has some potential. If he dropped the colon used to precede speech, and built the creepy up slowly rather than the jerky unsupported approach shown here then he could write a fairly good story. The style of the prose is engaging, and there is an appropriate balance between dialogue and action. It just needed a few tweaks, and a bit more grounding as to what the horror element actually entailed. I wanted to know how the room was haunted, why they stayed there anyway, what effect it had on people and perhaps a lore or legend as to how the 'haunted room' came to be haunted. I'd also like a more detailed ending that shows how she became depossessed.
This has the bare bones of a workable story, but it needs the flesh added. Forehadowing, a reason for the demon's presence and a more grounded approach to how he possesses (and when that possession ends) would improve this story considerably.
All in all, I think a rating of 2.5* rating is a fair reflection of this short story. I have therefore rounded up to 3* taking into account the low price point.
Our story starts with Emily, Aricia and Kira going out for drinks.Read more ›
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