The Dismembered [Blu-ray]
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(Apr 25, 2017)
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After a daring jewel heist, a trio of thieves hold up in an old dark house inhabited by a motley bunch of restless ghosts that only want to dispatch their new guests in the most horrible manner possible - that is if they can get to them before the spirits of an unruly group of dismembered corpses from the nearby cemetery! Shot in Philadelphia in 1962, this low-budget obscurity claws its way out of the cinematic grave to debut on home video for the very first time courtesy of a new HD Blu-ray from Garagehouse Pictures. Directed by Ralph S. Hirshorn, THE DISMEMBERED is an offbeat ghosts-and-gangsters satire that plays like a cross between Roger Corman and Casper the Friendly Ghost, and evokes the spirit of American International Pictures and the drive-in B movie. Featuring homicidal ghosts, creeping severed limbs, cobwebbed sets, graveyard atmosphere and weird musical improvisations by the Main Street Ghouls, THE DISMEMBERED is one strange little movie with lots of ghoulish charm.
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Top Customer Reviews
The film runs a mere 65 minutes and 5 minutes of that is the opening titles. The title sequence is actually done well with everyone in the cast appearing inside of a creepy frame. The opening music is actually pretty cool as well. Sounding like a old Frankie Stein Lp. Jazzy/creepy piano and weird electronic noises. Those same electronic noises get pretty irritating when they randomly happen throughout the film though.
First off the real title is "Oswald,you botched it again!" and that title comes from the main ghost Oswald trying to remove living people from the house of ghosts but accidentally killing them in the process. The "ghosts" are just 4 older people who talk endlessly about keeping people out.
A lot of the music and the way this was shot reminds me any generic 1930's haunted house movie. It's basically shot like a play and the old-timey piano had me expecting a guy in a gorilla suit to show up...thankfully that never happens. The pacing is terribly slow but surprisingly the acting is mostly ok ranging from pretty good to total ham.
Let me save you 65 minutes of your life by summing this up. 3 thieves steal some jewels and use a ambulance to escape. They drive out to a old house in the woods to lay low but it's inhabited by 4 very boring ghosts that can't be seen. The ghosts go on and on about how they don't want anyone there so they try to get rid of the robbers but accidentally kill them. They also keep mentioning "those things in the graveyard" which turn out to be one semi-creepy girl in a white dress and a few random body parts that come crawling into the house in the last 10 minutes.
None of this is done creepily it's all done "for laughs"....but no laughter came out of me...just a few yawns. At 47 minutes in a hand strangles a guy. 53 minuted in the body parts start crawling around. Talk talk talk...THE END.
This could have been pretty good if they had picked a real direction HORROR or HAM? The old house has some real atmosphere,the lighting is good,the makeup is good,and as stated the acting is not atrocious. The director said it was shot in just 11 days. I would have guessed one long weekend.