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Anastasia Higginbotham

Divorce Is the Worst (Ordinary Terrible Things) Hardcover – April 14, 2015

by Anastasia Higginbotham (Author)

52 ratings

Part of: Ordinary Terrible Things (5 books)

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Kids are told, "it's for the best"--and one day, it may be. But right now, divorce is the worst. With honesty and humor, Anastasia Higginbotham beautifully conveys the challenge of staying whole when your entire world, and the people in it, split apart. Exceptional in its child-centered portrayal, Divorce Is the Worst is an invaluable tool for families, therapeutic professionals, and divorce mediators struggling to address this common and complex experience.

The Ordinary Terrible Things Series shows children who navigate trouble with their senses on alert and their souls intact. In these stories of common childhood crises, help may come from family, counselors, teachers, or dreams—but crucially, it's the children themselves who find their way to cope and grow.

Reading age

4 - 8 years
Print length

64 pages
Language

English
Grade level

Preschool - 3
Dimensions

8.75 x 0.5 x 9 inches
Publisher

The Feminist Press at CUNY
Publication date

April 14, 2015
ISBN-10

1558618805
ISBN-13

978-1558618800
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Standing on My Own Two Feet: A Child's Affirmation of Love in the Midst of Divorce

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Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal

K-Gr 3—This insightful and attractive picture book looks at divorce from a child's perspective. The title opens on a gender-neutral and ethnically ambiguous child being told by (unseen) parents that they're planning on splitting up. The child addresses readers directly about divorce while going about daily life (riding a bike, going to the bathroom). Higginbotham is honest with kids, acknowledging unpleasant truths, such as typical emotional responses (anger, guilt, sorrow) and what to expect from parents (crying, fighting, even offering kids bribes to soften the blow). She also places the burden directly on parents: "We don't decide our parents' lives. What they decide affects our lives." The beautiful collage illustrations (backgrounds look like ripped or wrinkled craft paper with photos and other images pasted on) and hand-lettered typeface give the book a homemade feel that will resonate with children. Higginbotham's decision not to portray the parents is a wise one: because readers never see a mother or a father, the title could be used for same-sex divorces, too. Appended are instructions aimed at helping kids express negative emotions by making a collage of their own. VERDICT While divorce books are plentiful, this one stands above the rest.—Brooke Newberry, La Crosse Public Library, WI

Review

"The illustrations deliver a substantial emotional impact.. But it’s Higginbotham’s directness and refusal to talk down to her audience that will make this book such an asset to families negotiating divorce."
—Publishers Weekly

"While divorce books are plentiful, [Divorce Is the Worst] stands above the rest."
—School Library Journal

"How can you not love a children's author who sees so clearly from her reader's point of view?”
—Julie Bowen, actress, Modern Family

"This book provides, through honest language and evocative imagery, a uniquely realistic view of how children experience divorce. While neither softening nor whitewashing this difficult topic, Higginbotham offers an ultimately comforting message to parents and children experiencing separation and divorce."
—Lisa Spiegel, LMHC, director of Soho Parenting, NYC

"This is a cool book full of medicine for the heartsick child."
—Ani DiFranco, musician

"I wish so much that this book had existed during my divorce, to help my daughter through. I also wish it had existed during my parents' divorce, to help me through."
—Krista Vernoff, Screenwriter, Grey's Anatomy, Shameless

"The illustrations deliver a substantial emotional impact.. But it’s Higginbotham’s directness and refusal to talk down to her audience that will make this book such an asset to families negotiating divorce."
―Publishers Weekly

"While divorce books are plentiful, [Divorce Is the Worst] stands above the rest."
―School Library Journal

"How can you not love a children's author who sees so clearly from her reader's point of view?”
―Julie Bowen, actress, Modern Family

"This book provides, through honest language and evocative imagery, a uniquely realistic view of how children experience divorce. While neither softening nor whitewashing this difficult topic, Higginbotham offers an ultimately comforting message to parents and children experiencing separation and divorce."
―Lisa Spiegel, LMHC, director of Soho Parenting, NYC

"This is a cool book full of medicine for the heartsick child."
―Ani DiFranco, musician

"I wish so much that this book had existed during my divorce, to help my daughter through. I also wish it had existed during my parents' divorce, to help me through."
―Krista Vernoff, Screenwriter, Grey's Anatomy, Shameless

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ The Feminist Press at CUNY (April 14, 2015)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 64 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1558618805
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1558618800
Reading age ‏ : ‎ 4 - 8 years
Grade level ‏ : ‎ Preschool - 3
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 14.6 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 8.75 x 0.5 x 9 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #1,854,420 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #694 in Children's Books on Marriage & Divorce
- #2,466 in Divorce (Books)
- #11,342 in Children's Books on Emotions & Feelings (Books)

Customer Reviews:
52 ratings

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Anastasia Higginbotham

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Anastasia Higginbotham is an author, artist, and activist who created the Ordinary Terrible Things children’s book series which includes Divorce Is the Worst, Death Is Stupid, Tell Me About Sex, Grandma, and Not My Idea: A Book About Whiteness, published by Dottir Press. Not My Idea is the only children's picture book that roots the problem of racism in whiteness and empowers white children and families to see and dismantle white supremacy. Higginbotham makes her books by hand in collage on brown grocery bag paper, using recycled materials, including jewelry and fabric. She offers workshops at schools and libraries on art, activism, and how to make meaning through collage out of whatever broken, ragged, unraveling life circumstances we face. A speechwriter for social justice organizations, Higginbotham lives her books' messages and teaches self-defense through Prepare Inc. for students of all ages. Dottir Press will publish her next book, What You Don't Know: Not a Coming-out Story, in January 2021.

Customer reviews

5 star		62%
4 star		13%
3 star		9%
2 star		6%
1 star		10%

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Top reviews from the United States

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Janice Hadsell

Not what I want in my kids heads

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 8, 2020

Verified Purchase

Not sure the audience but book talks of divorce to child that the parents are possibly going to abandon you and the other parent is going to hid in bedroom and cry or be stuck on the couch ignoring you not care neglect people won't care when you are truly hurt but they are likely going to over compensate with inappropriately large gifts. The only thing worse than divorce being meeting your parents new friend. The book was also hard to read because it was unclear the order to be read it switched back and forth between narrator text and word bubbles and wasn't clear who was talking. Also everything about an adult getting a divorce was negative and the adult not saying or doing as they should. I am a better person divorced and so is my ex but it doesn't mean there isn't sadness for my kids who have two people they love not want to be together. It's frustrating to have two houses and not just one to feel a little lost there are so many emotions there and I think a book could help but I don't think this book would help anyone even the people who this reflects there experience with divorce. I realized this is reality for many so it might be more relavent to talk this way than about divorce how I have experienced it.

12 people found this helpful

Helpful

Lauren Kennedy

This book did amazing.

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 18, 2021

Verified Purchase

I bought it for myself after I heard about it on a podcast and read it to my kids. They LOVE the book and now read it to me.

One person found this helpful

Helpful

Anon42

this beautiful and touching book validates all the fears

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on April 11, 2016

Verified Purchase

Written directly to kids whose parents have divorced, this beautiful and touching book validates all the fears, feelings, and concerns that kids may have during this difficult time. It does not demonize parents or the process of a divorce, but rather helps children to understand that the powerful feelings they may be experiencing are perfectly normal and acceptable and are to be expected. This book seems like an invaluable tool for helping kids to get through the roughest time of their parents divorcing.

6 people found this helpful

Helpful

salgal

The collage art work is wonderful!

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on December 3, 2015

Verified Purchase

While I don't think that "Divorce is the WORST" thing that can happen to a child, the author allows the child to experience a wide range of feelings that are helpful. The collage art work is wonderful!

One person found this helpful

Helpful

Maureen Kilbourn

Pitch Perfect

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on December 5, 2015

Verified Purchase

With a combination of real photos and cut-outs, the illustrations for a book exploring a sensitive topic augment to tone of Divorce is the Worst. This book is not maudlin; it makes one smile, nod, and move into a place of better understanding. I would recommend this book for any therapist or family struggling to make sense of a hard part of life for some.

7 people found this helpful

Helpful

Danielle H

Nice

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on January 19, 2020

Verified Purchase

Seemed to open up a nice and honest dialogue about what's going on in our family. Would recommend for parents going through divorce.

3 people found this helpful

Helpful

MKMin

I was hoping more emotion would be expressed. It ...

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on August 14, 2015

Verified Purchase

I was hoping more emotion would be expressed. It seemed to give permission to feel things, but actually left me feeling emotionally flat.

3 people found this helpful

Helpful

S. Morris

Four Stars

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on June 29, 2015

Verified Purchase

Fair to good book

Helpful

Top reviews from other countries

SCH

Excellent book that helps children process all of the raw emotion around divorce!

Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on February 23, 2020

Verified Purchase

A really great book that verbalizes what every child is feeling. An honest piece written by a child herself, I think every parent going through divorce needs to get this book for their children who are 6 and above. It gives the children the permission to say exactly what they're feeling, which will end up helping them process this divorce in a healthier way and get to a better place emotionally in the end. My children and I fully recommend this book!!

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