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The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self Hardcover – July 22, 2008
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"Rare and compelling in its compassion and its unassuming eloquence...her examples are so vivid and so ordinary they touch the hurt child in us all"―The New York Magazine
"An unpretentious little book with an amazing impact...Many readers find themselves portrayed with an accuracy and empathy that seem uncanny, as if the author had been a silent, unseen witness to their childhood [and] their innermost and secret selves."―Vogue
"Narcissism has rarely been written about with the clarity and quiet insights of this modest, thought-provoking work."―Washington Post Book World
"Full of wisdom and perception."―The New Republic
About the Author
Alice Miller (1923-2010) achieved worldwide recognition for her work on the causes and effects of childhood traumas. She was also the author of many books, including The Truth Will Set You Free, Banished Knowledge, Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, Thou Shalt Not Be Aware, and For Your Own Good.
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Alice describes me and my life perfectly in this book. It was really amazing to read and identify with so much of what she said. Almost everything she talks about was something I hadn't thought of before--at least in the way she explains things. There was also one thing she explains that I have had a profound experience with, that I have never heard of anyone else experiencing. It was amazing to hear that what I had experienced and worked through is actually common.
One thing I could never understand about myself was why I still have low self-esteem. Intellectually, I can see why I (or anyone for that matter) should have self-esteem. I had read many books and done work in therapy specifically for this issue, but it still remained a complete mystery for me.
The ideas in this book have given me the tools to become my "true self" and get that self-esteem I have always lacked. I admit that I have only just finished reading the book and have yet to do most of the work involved in this, but I feel incredibly confident that this is what I have been missing (for me with these type of therapeutic and self-revelations, you know when something speaks to you like this). I now have a plan for working through this issue and I feel confident I now know what has been holding me back.
I can't recommend this book highly enough. I've already purchased another one of Alice's books and I hope it is as helpful for me as this one has been.
What a relief when Alice was describing feelings and experiences. It's like she was seeing through the eyes of my childhood! What a moment! I wept with tears of joy. The feeling of simply being seen, felt, and validated is one that cannot be put into words. This book gave me the hope and courage to press on. Thanks to Alice Miller, and her work upon the planet, I can happily move forward reconnecting with the lost self within. What a gift!
Please honor yourself by picking up this book. Anyone who struggles with their life and pain, this book could a real life changer!
If I have one criticism it's that she stops short of talking about how to proceed in this process of feeling the crucial feelings, clarifying them etc.....I suppose she would say that's what therapy is for.
But good luck finding a competent one even if you can afford it.